Parents' Saturdays - days special commemoration the departed, when with our prayers we can provide great help to our family and friends who have passed on from earthly life. Five of them are reserved for commemorating deceased relatives, two more and the memorial services performed at the same time are called ecumenical. Parental Saturdays require observance certain rules which all believers should know.
The deep meaning of parental Saturday
Please note that strong alcoholic drinks, such as vodka or cognac, are not accepted as donations.
If desired and possible, you can order a memorial service and after the prayers are completed, you are allowed to visit the cemetery, tidy up the grave, replace the flowers, thereby showing that you are preserving the memory of your loved one.
How to spend the rest of the day on Parents' Saturday and is it possible to clean up? Archpriest Alexander Ilyashenko for the online publication “Orthodoxy and Peace” answers this question this way: the ban on cleaning the house on this day is nothing more than superstition, the day, of course, needs to start with visiting the temple, performing prayers, visiting the cemetery, and then If necessary, you can perform your usual household chores.
Another important question that concerns believers is whether it is possible to baptize a child on parental Saturday? Hegumen Alexy (Vladivostok diocese) and other priests of the Russian Orthodox Church remind us of a simple rule - you can baptize a child on all days without restrictions.
During the period of Lent in 2019, the following parental Saturdays fall:
- March 23 - Parental Ecumenical Saturday of the second week of Lent
- March 30 - Parental Ecumenical Saturday of the third week of Lent
- April 6 is Parental Ecumenical Saturday of the fourth week of Lent.
P.S. Prayer for the deceased is the sacred duty of every Christian. A great reward and great consolation awaits the one who, with his prayers, helps a deceased neighbor receive forgiveness of sins.
| Saturday | date | Description |
| Ecumenical Parents' Saturdays | ||
| Trinity Saturday | Saturday before the Feast of the Holy Trinity | On Trinity and Meat Saturdays, an ecumenical memorial service is celebrated. |
| Meat Saturday | The week before Lent | It is called Meat Eating Week because it precedes Meat Eating Week (the Sunday before Maslenitsa). |
| Parental Saturdays of Great Lent | ||
| Saturdays | Saturdays of the 2nd, 3rd, 4th weeks of Lent | During the weekdays of Lent, the usual Liturgy is not celebrated unless big holiday. Consequently, the main liturgical commemoration of the dead is also performed less frequently. In order not to deprive the dead of prayer representation for them, I established these three special day to pray for them. |
| Private Parent Saturdays | ||
| 9th day after Easter, Tuesday | Radonitsa - from the word joy, because this day always falls during the Easter period. Usually on this day a memorial service is held, which includes Easter chants. After the service, believers visit the cemetery to pray for the departed. | |
| Day of Remembrance of Orthodox Warriors | 11 September | The commemoration was established during Russian-Turkish War (1768-1774) |
| Saturday preceding the day of remembrance of the Great Martyr Demetrius of Thessalonica (November 8) | Established by the noble Prince Dimitry Donskoy after returning to Moscow from the battle on the Kulikovo Field (September 8, 1380). Upon returning from the battlefield, Dimitri Ioannovich attended the funeral service at the Trinity-Sergius Monastery. Over time, a tradition developed to perform such a commemoration annually. | |
| Day of Remembrance of all those killed during the Great Patriotic War | 9th May | Afterwards it is served. Special commemoration of all those who died during the years of persecution for faith in Christ is performed on the day of remembrance of the new martyrs and confessors of Russia (the first Sunday after January 25) |
Parents' Saturdays- nine days of special remembrance for Orthodox Christians. Every Saturday is dedicated to the remembrance of the dead, but there are also specially designated Saturday days. They are called parental because parents are the people closest to us, but these days they pray not only for relatives.
All parent ones, except one (May 9), have a moving date.
On these days, funeral services are performed - funeral services. Please note that public worship may begin the night before (i.e. Friday) as The liturgical day begins in the evening.
Of the nine days of special commemoration of the dead, two Ecumenical Memorial Saturdays stand out: Meat Saturday and Trinity Saturday. The main meaning of these “ecumenical” (common to the entire Orthodox Church) funeral services is prayer for all deceased Orthodox Christians, regardless of their personal closeness to us.
Parents' Saturday- a generalized name for the day of special remembrance of the dead. Special, not in terms of something different, but in terms of intensified ones. On this day, the entirety of the Church prays for the repose of the souls of deceased Orthodox Christians. For us - the living - this day of remembrance of our loved ones should, if possible, be spent in prayer. The leitmotif of all prayers for repose is forgiveness of sins. The dead have no time to repent and ask for forgiveness, but we can make every effort and ask God for mercy towards them. And the Lord, seeing our zeal, taking into account our deeds of prayer and alms (and alms can be given for the deceased), can forgive all the sins of a deceased person.
On parent's Saturdays Orthodox Christian, if possible, we need to attend the funeral liturgy and memorial service, pray during the service not only for our loved ones, but also for all deceased Orthodox Christians (in Church Slavonic - “departed from eternity”), then visit the cemetery and there perform a private prayer - a requiem mass, litia or, if time permits, read the 17th kathisma of the Psalter. It is most important. As for the meal, this side of life is not regulated in any way by church rules. There is only one rule - moderation. In everything. And don’t forget: the main thing on this day is prayer.
Priest Pavel Konkov (magazine “Foma”)
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When are funeral services for parental Saturdays held in the church?
The liturgical day begins in the evening, so funeral services often begin in the evening of the previous day. The most important commemoration is at the Liturgy (usually served in the morning).
Is it necessary to go to the cemetery on Parents' Saturday?
Prayerful remembrance in a church is incomparably more important for the deceased than visiting a grave, but the first does not exclude the second. It is important to maintain a hierarchy: worship comes first, a trip to the cemetery comes second. Christians perform the ceremony at the grave or invite a priest.
Why do they bring food to the temple?
Initially, food was brought for a joint funeral meal. In our time - as a sacrifice to the clergy and clergy for the soul's sake.
One should be sober about the tradition of bringing food “to”, based on modern realities. No matter how hard the priests try, they can’t eat 30 loaves of bread or 20 packs of gingerbread, so it makes sense to bring food items that can be stored for a long time. A donation can also be made to the church mug; the church has many needs, not just food.
“Today is parenting!” - a phrase we hear several times a year. With God, everyone is alive, and memory and prayer for our deceased relatives and friends is an important part of the Christian faith. We will talk about what kind of parental Saturdays there are, about church and folk traditions of days of special remembrance of the dead, about how to pray for the dead and whether it is necessary to go to the cemetery on parental Saturdays.
What is Parents' Saturday
Parents' Saturdays (and there are several of them in the church calendar) are days of special remembrance of the dead. On these days, special commemoration of deceased Orthodox Christians is performed in Orthodox churches. In addition, according to tradition, believers visit graves in cemeteries.
The name “parental” most likely comes from the tradition of calling the deceased “parents,” that is, those who went to their fathers. Another version is that Saturdays began to be called “parental” Saturdays, because Christians prayerfully commemorated, first of all, their deceased parents.
Among other parental Saturdays (and there are seven of them in a year), Ecumenical Saturdays are distinguished, on which the Orthodox Church prayerfully commemorates all baptized Christians. There are two such Saturdays: Meat (the week before Lent) and Trinity (on the eve of the Feast of Pentecost). The remaining parental Saturdays are not ecumenical and are reserved specifically for private commemoration of people dear to our hearts.
How many parent's Saturdays a year?
In the calendar of the Russian Orthodox Church there are seven days of special commemoration of the departed. All but one (May 9 - Commemoration of Dead Soldiers) have a moving date.
Meat Saturday (Ecumenical Parental Saturday)
Saturday of the 2nd week of Lent
Saturday of the 3rd week of Lent
Saturday of the 4th week of Lent
Radonitsa
Saturday Trinity
Saturday Dimitrievskaya
Parents' Saturdays in 2014
Parents' Saturdays in 2015
What are universal parental Saturdays?
Among other parental Saturdays (and there are seven of them in a year), Ecumenical Saturdays are distinguished, on which the Orthodox Church prayerfully commemorates all baptized Christians. There are two such Saturdays: Meat (the week before Lent) and Trinity (on the eve of the Feast of Pentecost). On these two days, special services are held - ecumenical memorial services.
What is invillage funeral services
On parental Saturdays, the Orthodox Church holds ecumenical or parental memorial services. Christians use the word “requiem service” to refer to a funeral service at which believers pray for the repose of the dead and ask the Lord for mercy and forgiveness of sins.
What is a memorial service
Panikhida translated from Greek means " All-night vigil." This funeral service, at which believers pray for the repose of the dead, asking the Lord for mercy and forgiveness of sins.
Ecumenical (meat-free) parental Saturday
Meat Saturday (Ecumenical Parental Saturday) is the Saturday a week before the start of Lent. It is called Meat Eating Week because it falls on Meat Eating Week (the week before Maslenitsa). It is also called Little Maslenitsa.
On this day, Orthodox Christians commemorate all the baptized dead from Adam to the present day. An ecumenical requiem service is served in the churches - “The memory of all Orthodox Christians who have departed from time immemorial, our fathers and brothers.”
Trinity Parents' Saturday
Trinity is the second ecumenical parental Saturday (after Meat), on which the Orthodox Church prayerfully commemorates all baptized Christians. It falls on the Saturday preceding the holiday of Trinity, or Pentecost. On this day, believers come to churches for a special ecumenical memorial service- “The memory of all Orthodox Christians who have departed from time immemorial, our fathers and brothers.”
Parental Saturdays of the 2nd, 3rd and 4th weeks of Lent
During Lent, according to the Charter, funeral commemorations are not performed (funeral litanies, litias, requiems, commemorations of the 3rd, 9th and 40th days after death, magpies), therefore the Church has set aside special three days when one can prayerfully remember the departed. These are the Saturdays of the 2nd, 3rd and 4th weeks of Lent.
Radonitsa
Radonitsa, or Radunitsa, is one of the days of special remembrance of the dead, which falls on the Tuesday after St. Thomas week (the second week after Easter). On Thomas Sunday, Christians remember how the resurrected Jesus Christ descended into hell and defeated death, and Radonitsa, directly associated with this day, also tells us about victory over death.
On Radonitsa, according to tradition, Orthodox Christians go to the cemetery, and there, at the graves of their relatives and friends, they glorify the Risen Christ. Radonitsa, in fact, is called so precisely from the word “joy”, the joyful news of the Resurrection of Christ
Commemoration of deceased soldiers - May 9
Commemoration of the departed warriors is the only day of special remembrance of the dead in the year, which has a fixed date. This is May 9, Victory Day in the Great Patriotic War. On this day, after the liturgy, churches serve a memorial service for the soldiers who gave their lives for their homeland.
Dimitrievskaya Parents' Saturday
Demetrius Parental Saturday is the Saturday before the day of remembrance of the Holy Great Martyr Demetrius of Thessaloniki, which is celebrated on November 8 according to the new style. If the saint’s memorial day also falls on a Saturday, the previous one is still considered the parent’s day.
Dimitrievskaya Parental Saturday became a day of special remembrance of the dead after the victory of Russian soldiers in the Battle of Kulikovo in 1380. At first, on this day they commemorated precisely those who died on the Kulikovo field, then, over the centuries, the tradition changed. In the Novgorod chronicle of the 15th century, we read about Dimitrievskaya parental Saturday as a day of remembrance of all the dead.
Funeral commemoration on Parents' Saturday
On the eve of parental Saturday, that is, on Friday evening, in Orthodox harmas a great requiem service is served, which is also called by the Greek word “parastas”. On Saturday itself, in the morning, they serve the funeral Divine Liturgy, followed by a general memorial service.
At the parastas or at the funeral Divine Liturgy, you can submit notes of repose with the names of those who have died close to your heart. And on this day, according to the old church tradition, parishioners bring food to the temple - “for the canon” (or “for the eve”). These are Lenten products, wine (Cahors) for celebrating the liturgy.
Why do they bring food “for the eve”?
Answers p
Bringing food to the temple - “on the eve” - is an ancient practice of performing general funeral feasts, that is, commemorating the dead. According to tradition, the parishioners of the temple gathered a larger common table in order to all together remember the deceased people close to their hearts. Now the food that believers bring and place on a special table then goes to the needs of the parish and to help the poor people whom the parish cares for.
It seems to me that this is a good custom - to help those in need or ease the burden of people who serve in the temple (of course, these are not only clergy, but also candle makers and all those who, for free, by the will of their hearts, help in the House of God). By bringing food to the temple, we serve our neighbors and remember our departed ones.
Prayer for the departed
Rest, O Lord, the souls of Your departed servants: my parents, relatives, benefactors (their names) and all Orthodox Christians, and forgive them all sins, voluntary and involuntary, and grant them the Kingdom of Heaven.
It is more convenient to read names from a commemoration book - a small book where the names of living and deceased relatives are written down. There is a pious custom of conducting family memorials, reading which both in home prayer and during church service, Orthodox people They remember by name many generations of their deceased ancestors.
Prayer for a deceased Christian
Remember, O Lord our God, in the faith and hope of the eternal life of Your departed servant, our brother (name), and as Good and Lover of mankind, forgiving sins and consuming untruths, weaken, forsake and forgive all his voluntary and involuntary sins, deliver him eternal torment and fire of Gehenna, and grant him the communion and enjoyment of Your eternal good things, prepared for those who love You: even if you sin, do not depart from You, and undoubtedly in the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, Your glorified God in the Trinity, Faith, and Unity in the Trinity and the Trinity in Unity, Orthodox even until his last breath of confession. Be merciful to him, and faith, even in You instead of deeds, and with Your saints, as You give generous rest: for there is no man who will live and not sin. But You are the One besides all sin, and Your righteousness is righteousness forever, and You are the One God of mercies and generosity, and love for mankind, and to You we send glory to the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, now and ever, and to the ages of ages. Amen
Widower's Prayer
Christ Jesus, Lord and Almighty! In contrition and tenderness of my heart, I pray to You: rest, O Lord, the soul of Your departed servant (name), in Your Heavenly Kingdom. Lord Almighty! You blessed the marital union of husband and wife, when you said: it is not good for man to be alone, let us create for him a helper for him. You have sanctified this union in the image of the spiritual union of Christ with the Church. I believe, Lord, and confess that You have blessed me to unite me in this holy union with one of Your handmaids. By your good and wise will you deigned to take away from me this servant of yours, whom you have given to me as a helper and companion of my life. I bow before Your will, and I pray to You with all my heart, accept my prayer for Your servant (name), and forgive her if you sin in word, deed, thought, knowledge and ignorance; Love earthly things more than heavenly things; Even if you care more about the clothing and decoration of your body than about the enlightenment of the clothing of your soul; or even careless about your children; if you upset anyone by word or deed; If there is a grudge in your heart against your neighbor or condemn someone or anything else you have done from such evil people.
Forgive her all this, for she is good and philanthropic; for there is no man who will live and not sin. Do not enter into judgment with Thy servant, as Thy creation, do not condemn her to eternal torment for her sin, but have mercy and mercy according to Thy great mercy. I pray and ask You, Lord, to grant me strength throughout the days of my life, without ceasing to pray for Your departed servant, and even until the end of my life to ask her from You, the Judge of the whole world, to forgive her sins. Yes, as if You, God, placed a crown of stone on her head, crowning her here on earth; So crown me with Your eternal glory in Your Heavenly Kingdom, with all the saints who rejoice there, so that together with them the all-holy may eternally sing your name with the Father and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Widow's Prayer
Christ Jesus, Lord and Almighty! You are the consolation of the weeping, the intercession of the orphans and widows. You said: call on Me in the day of your sorrow, and I will destroy you. In the days of my sorrow, I run to You and pray to You: do not turn Your face away from me and hear my prayer brought to You with tears. You, Lord, Master of all, have deigned to unite me with one of Your servants, so that we may be one body and one spirit; You gave me this servant as a companion and protector. It was Your good and wise will that you would take this servant of Yours away from me and leave me alone. I bow before Your will and I resort to You in the days of my sorrow: quench my sorrow about separation from Your servant, my friend. Even if you took him away from me, do not take your mercy away from me. Just as you once accepted two mites from widows, so accept this prayer of mine. Remember, Lord, the soul of Your departed servant (name), forgive him all his sins, voluntary and involuntary, whether in word, or in deed, or in knowledge and ignorance, do not destroy him with his iniquities and do not consign him to eternal torment, but according to Your great mercy and according to the multitude of Thy compassions, weaken and forgive all his sins and commit them with Thy saints, where there is no sickness, no sorrow, no sighing, but endless life. I pray and ask You, Lord, grant that all the days of my life I will not cease to pray for Your departed servant, and even before my departure, ask You, the Judge of the whole world, to forgive all his sins and place him in the Heavenly abodes, which You have prepared for those who love Cha. For even if you sin, do not depart from You, and undoubtedly the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit are Orthodox even to your last breath of confession; impute to him the same faith, even in You, instead of works: for there is no man who will live and not sin, You are the only one besides sin, and Your righteousness is righteousness forever. I believe, Lord, and confess that You will hear my prayer and do not turn Your face away from me. Seeing a widow weeping green, you were merciful, and you brought her son to the grave, carrying her to the grave; How did You open to Your servant Theophilus, who went to You, the doors of Your mercy and forgave him for his sins through the prayers of Your Holy Church, heeding the prayers and alms of his wife: here and I pray to You, accept my prayer for Your servant and bring him into eternal life. For You are our hope. You are God, the hedgehog to have mercy and save, and we send glory to You with the Father and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Parents' prayer for deceased children
Lord Jesus Christ, our God, Lord of life and death, Comforter of the afflicted! With a contrite and tender heart I run to You and pray to You: remember. Lord, in Your Kingdom your deceased servant (your servant), my child (name), and create for him (her) eternal memory. You, Lord of life and death, have given me this child. It was your good and wise will to take it away from me. Blessed be Thy name, O Lord. I pray to You, Judge of heaven and earth, with Your endless love for us sinners, forgive my deceased child all his sins, voluntary and involuntary, in word, in deed, in knowledge and ignorance. Forgive, O Merciful One, our parental sins as well, so that they may not remain on our children: we know that we have sinned many times before You, many of whom we have not observed, and have not done, as You commanded us. If our deceased child, ours or his own, for the sake of guilt, lived in this life, working for the world and his flesh, and not more than You, the Lord and his God: if you loved the delights of this world, and not more than Your Word and Your commandments, if you surrendered with the pleasures of life, and not more than with contrition for one’s sins, and in intemperance, vigil, fasting and prayer have been consigned to oblivion - I earnestly pray to Thee, forgive, most good Father, all such sins of my child, forgive and weaken, even if you have done other evil in this life . Christ Jesus! You raised up the daughter of Jairus through the faith and prayer of her father. You healed the daughter of the Canaanite wife through faith and the request of her mother: hear my prayer, and do not despise my prayer for my child. Forgive, Lord, forgive all his sins and, having forgiven and cleansed his soul, remove eternal torment and dwell with all Your saints, who have pleased You from the ages, where there is no sickness, no sorrow, no sighing, but endless life: like there is no man like He will live and will not sin, but You are the only One besides all sin: so that when you judge the world, my child will hear Your most beloved voice: come, blessed of My Father, and inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For You are the Father of mercies and generosity. You are our life and resurrection, and we send glory to You with the Father and the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto ages of ages. Amen.
Children's prayer for deceased parents
Lord Jesus Christ our God! You are the keeper of the orphans, the refuge of the grieving and the comforter of the weeping. I come running to you, an orphan, groaning and crying, and I pray to you: hear my prayer and do not turn your face away from the sighs of my heart and from the tears of my eyes. I pray to You, merciful Lord, satisfy my grief over separation from my parent (my mother), (name) (or: with my parents who gave birth and raised me, their names) - , and his soul (or: her, or: them), as having gone (or: gone) to You with true faith in You and with firm hope in Your love for mankind and mercy, accept into Your Kingdom of Heaven. I bow before Your holy will, which was taken away (or: taken away, or: taken away) from me, and I ask You not to take away from him (or: from her, or: from them) Your mercy and mercy. We know, Lord, that You are the Judge of this world, you punish the sins and wickedness of the fathers in children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, even to the third and fourth generation: but you also have mercy on the fathers for the prayers and virtues of their children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. With contrition and tenderness of heart, I pray to Thee, merciful Judge, do not punish with eternal punishment the unforgettable deceased (unforgettable deceased) for me Thy servant (Thy servant), my parent (my mother) (name), but forgive him (her) all his sins ( her) voluntary and involuntary, in word and deed, knowledge and ignorance, created by him (her) in his (her) life here on earth, and according to Your mercy and love for mankind, prayers for the sake of the Most Pure Mother of God and all the saints, have mercy on him (her) and eternal save me from torment. You, merciful Father of fathers and children! Grant me, all the days of my life, until my last breath, not to cease to remember my deceased parent (my deceased mother) in my prayers, and to beg Thee, the righteous Judge, to order him in a place of light, in a place of coolness and in a place of peace, with all the saints, from nowhere all sickness, sorrow and sighing have fled. Merciful Lord! Accept this day for Thy servant (Your) (name) my warm prayer and give him (her) Your reward for the labors and cares of my upbringing in faith and Christian piety, as He taught (taught) me first of all to lead You, my Lord, in reverently pray to You, trust in You alone in troubles, sorrows and illnesses and keep Your commandments; for his (her) concern for my spiritual progress, for the warmth of his (her) prayer for me before You and for all the gifts he (she) asked me from You, reward him (her) with Your mercy. Your heavenly blessings and joys in Your eternal Kingdom. For You are the God of mercies and generosity and love for mankind, You are the peace and joy of Your faithful servants, and we send glory to You with the Father and the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages. Amen
Is it necessary to go to the cemetery on Parents' Saturday?
Answers p Rotopriest Igor FOMIN, rector of the Church of the Holy Blessed Prince Alexander Nevsky at MGIMO:
The main thing is not to go to the cemetery instead of services in the temple. For our deceased relatives and friends, our prayer is much more important than visiting the grave. So try to get into the worship service, listen to the chants in the temple, turn your heart to the Lord.
Folk traditions of parental Saturdays
In Rus', folk traditions of commemorating dead people were somewhat different from church traditions. Ordinary people went to the graves of relatives before major holidays - on the eve of Maslenitsa, Trinity (Pentecost), Intercession Holy Mother of God and the day of remembrance of the Holy Great Martyr Demetrius of Thessaloniki.
Most of all, people revered Dmitrievskaya parental Saturday. In 1903, Emperor Nicholas II even issued a decree on holding a special memorial service for the soldiers who fell for the Fatherland - “For the faith, the Tsar and the Fatherland, who laid down their lives on the battlefield.”
In Ukraine and Belarus, days of special commemoration of the dead were called “Grandfathers”. There were up to six such “Grandfathers” a year. The people superstitiously believed that these days the family funeral meal all deceased relatives join invisibly.
Radonitsa was called “Joyful Grandfathers”; people loved this day very much, because they went to the graves of loved ones with the happy news of the Resurrection of Christ. There were also Pokrovskys, Nikolsky Grandfathers and others.
Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh. Sermon on the Remembrance of Orthodox soldiers who died on the battlefield
We are accustomed in our lives to the fact that for every need, for every occasion, we turn to God for His help. And for our every call, for every cry of anguish, suffering, fear, we expect that the Lord will intercede for us, protect us, comfort us; and we know that He does this constantly and that He showed His utmost care for us by becoming Man and dying for us and for our sake.
But sometimes it happens in the life of our world that God turns to man for help; and this happens all the time, but often barely noticeable, or goes completely unnoticed by us. God constantly turns to each of us, asking, praying, persuading us to be in this world, which He loved so much that He laid down His life for it, to be His living presence, to be His living care, sighted, good-acting, attentive. He tells us: whatever good we did for any person, we did for Him, calling us by this to be, as it were, in His place.
And sometimes He calls some people to more personal service to Him. In the Old Testament we read about prophets: the prophet Amos says that a prophet is a person with whom God shares His thoughts; but not only with your thoughts, but also with your deeds. Remember the prophet Isaiah, who in a vision beheld the Lord looking around and saying: Whom shall I send? - and the prophet stood up and said: Me, Lord!
But here, among the prophets, among the people who served God with an undivided heart, with all the great strength of their soul, there is one, whose memory we commemorate today and whom Christ called the greatest among those born on earth.
And indeed, when you think about his fate, it seems that there is no fate more majestic and more tragic. His whole fate was, as it were, not to be, so that in the consciousness and vision of people the Only One Who There is: Lord.
Remember the first thing that is said about him in the Gospel of Mark: He is a voice crying in the wilderness... He is only a voice, he is so indistinguishable from his ministry that he has become only God’s voice, only an evangelist; as if he, as a person of flesh and blood, a person who can yearn, and suffer, and pray, and search, and ultimately stand before impending death - as if this person does not exist. He and his calling are one and the same; he is the voice of the Lord, sounding and thundering in the midst of the human desert; that desert where souls are empty - because there were people around John, and the desert remained unchanged from this.
And further. The Lord Himself says about him in the Gospel that he is the Friend of the Groom. A friend who loves the bride and groom so much, so deeply that he is able, forgetting himself, to serve their love, and to serve so that he will never be superfluous, never be there and then when it is not needed. He is a friend who is able to protect the love of the bride and groom and remain outside, the keeper of the secret of this love. Here, too, is the great secret of a man who is capable of, as it were, don't become in order for something greater than him to was.
And then he speaks about himself in relation to the Lord: I need to decrease, come to naught, in order for Him to increase... It is necessary that they forget about me, and remember only about Him, so that my disciples turn away from me and leave, like Andrew and John on the banks of the Jordan, and followed Him with an undivided heart: I live only so that I am gone!
And the last is the terrible image of John, when he was already in prison, when the ring of death was narrowing around him, when he no longer had a way out, when this colossally great soul wavered... Death was coming towards him, the life in which he had there was nothing of our own: in the past there was only the feat of self-denial, and ahead was darkness.
And at that moment, when his spirit wavered, he sent his disciples to ask Christ: Are you the one for whom we have been waiting? If That - then it was worth in my youth die alive; if He, then it was worth diminishing from year to year so that he would be forgotten and only the image of the Coming One would increase in the eyes of people; if He - then it was worth it even now to die the last dying, because everything for which he lived was fulfilled and perfect.
But what if He is not the One? Then everything is lost, youth is ruined, mature years are ruined greatest power, everything is ruined, everything is meaningless. And it’s even more terrible that this happened, because God seemed to deceive: God, who called him into the desert; God, who took him away from people; God, who inspired him to the feat of self-death. Has God really deceived, and life has passed, and there is no return?
And so, sending the disciples to Christ with the question: Are you the one? - he does not receive a direct, comforting answer; Christ does not answer him: Yes, I am He, go in peace! He only gives the prophet the answer of another prophet that the blind receive their sight, that the lame walk, that the dead are raised, that the poor preach the good news. He gives an answer from Isaiah, but does not add His words - nothing except one formidable warning: Blessed is he who is not offended because of Me; go tell John...
And this answer reached John in his dying anticipation: believe to the end; believe, without requiring any signs, or evidence, or proof; believe, because you heard inside, in the depths of your soul, the voice of the Lord, commanding you to do the work of the prophet... Others can somehow rely on the Lord in their times greatest feat; God supports John only by commanding him to be the Forerunner and for this to show utmost faith and confidence in invisible things.
And that’s why it takes our breath away when we think about him, and that’s why, when we think about a feat that has no limit, we remember John. That is why, of those who were born among people by natural birth and ascended miraculously by grace, he is the greatest of all.
Today we celebrate the day of the beheading of his head. Let's celebrate... We are used to understanding the word “celebrate” as “joy,” but it means “to remain idle.” And you can remain idle because joy overwhelms your soul and there is no time for ordinary affairs, or it may happen that you give up from grief and horror. And this is today’s holiday: what will you take up in the face of what we heard about today in the Gospel?
And on this day, when we give up before the horror and greatness of this fate, the Church calls us to pray for those who were also in horror, and trembling, and bewilderment, and sometimes died in despair: they died on the battlefield, they died in dungeons, they died the lonely death of a man. After you venerate the cross, we will pray for all those who laid down their lives on the battlefield so that others could live; bowed to the ground so that another could rise. Let us remember those who, not only in our time, but from millennium to millennium, died a terrible death, because they knew how to love, or because others did not know how to love - let us remember everyone, because the Lord’s love embraces everyone, and it will be for everyone, praying, the great John, who went through the whole tragedy of the sacrifice of dying and death without a single word of consolation, but only according to the sovereign command of God: “Believe to the end, and be faithful to the end!” Amen.
Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh. About death
I have a peculiar attitude towards death, and I would like to explain why I treat death not only calmly, but with desire, with hope, with longing for it.
My first vivid impression about death - a conversation with my father, who once told me: “You must live in such a way that you learn to expect your death the way a groom expects his bride: wait for it, long for it, rejoice in advance about this meeting, and meet it reverently, affectionately." The second impression (of course, not immediately, but much later) was the death of my father. He died suddenly. I came to him, to a poor little room at the top of a French house, where there was a bed, a table, a stool and a few books. I entered his room, closed the door and stood there. And I was overcome by such silence, such a depth of silence that I remember exclaiming out loud: “And people say that death exists!” What a lie this is!” Because this room was full of life, and such a fullness of life that I had never seen outside it, on the street, in the yard. This is why I have such an attitude towards death and why I experience the words of the Apostle Paul with such force: For me, life is Christ, death is gain, because while I live in the flesh, I am separated from Christ... But the apostle adds further words that also greatly amazed me. The quote is not exact, but this is what he says: he completely wants to die and unite with Christ, but he adds: “However, it is necessary for you that I remain alive, and I will continue to live.” This is the last sacrifice he can make: everything he strives for, everything he hopes for, everything he does, he is ready to put aside because others need him.
I have seen a lot of death. I worked as a doctor for fifteen years, five of which were in the war or in the French Resistance. After that, I lived for forty-six years as a priest and gradually buried an entire generation of our early emigration; so I saw a lot of death. And I was amazed that the Russians were dying calmly; Western people are more often with fear. Russians believe in life, go into life. And this is one of the things that every priest and every person must repeat to himself and others: we must not prepare for death, we must prepare for eternal life.
We know nothing about death. We don’t know what happens to us at the moment of dying, but we at least know rudimentarily what eternal life is. Each of us knows from experience that there are some moments when he no longer lives in time, but with such a fullness of life, such a jubilation that does not just belong to the earth. Therefore, the first thing we must teach ourselves and others is to prepare not for death, but for life. And if we talk about death, then talk about it only as a door that will open wide and allow us to enter eternal life.
But dying is still not easy. Whatever we think about death, about eternal life, we know nothing about death itself, about dying. I want to give you one example of my experience during the war.
I was a junior surgeon in a front-line hospital. A young soldier of about twenty-five, my age, was dying. I came to him in the evening, sat down next to him and said: “Well, how are you feeling?” He looked at me and answered: “I’m going to die tonight.” - “Are you afraid of dying?” - “It’s not scary to die, but it hurts me to part with everything that I love: with my young wife, with the village, with my parents; and one thing is really scary: to die alone.” I say: “You will not die alone.” "So how?" - “I’ll stay with you.” - “You can’t sit with me all night...” I replied: “Of course I can!” He thought and said: “Even if you sit with me, at some point I will no longer be aware of it, and then I will go into the darkness and die alone." I say: “No, not at all. I will sit next to you." you, and we will talk. You will tell me everything you want: about the village, about the family, about childhood, about your wife, about everything that is in your memory, in your soul, that you love. I will hold your hand . Gradually, you will become tired of talking, then I will talk more than you. And then I will see that you are starting to doze off, and then I will speak more quietly. You close your eyes, I will stop talking, but I will hold your hand, and you will periodically you will shake my hand, you will know that I am here. Gradually, your hand, although it will feel my hand, will no longer be able to shake it, I myself will begin to shake your hand. And at some point you will no longer be among us, but you will leave not alone. We will make the whole journey together." And so, hour after hour, we spent that night. At some point, he actually stopped squeezing my hand, I started shaking his hand, so that he knew that I was here. Then his hand began to grow cold, then it opened, and he was no longer with us. And it's very important point; It is very important that a person is not alone when he goes into eternity.
But it also happens differently. Sometimes a person is sick for a long time, and if he is then surrounded by love and care, it is easy to die, although it hurts (I will also say this). But it is very scary when a person is surrounded by people who are just waiting for him to die: they say, while he is sick, we are prisoners of his illness, we cannot move away from his bed, we cannot return to our lives, we cannot rejoice in our joys; he hangs over us like a dark cloud; as if he would die quickly... And the dying person feels it. This can last for months. Relatives come and coldly ask: “How do you like it? Nothing? Do you need something? do not need anything? OK; you know, I have my own things to do, I’ll come back to you.” And even if the voice does not sound cruel, the person knows that he has been visited only because it was necessary to visit, but that his death is eagerly awaited.
But sometimes it happens differently. A person dies, dies for a long time, but he is loved, he is dear; and he himself is also ready to sacrifice the happiness of being with a loved one, because this can give joy or help to someone else. Let me now say something personal about myself.
My mother had been dying of cancer for three years; I followed her. We were very close and dear to each other. But I had my own job - I was the only priest of the London parish, and besides, once a month I had to travel to Paris for meetings of the Diocesan Council. I didn’t have the money to make a phone call, so I came back, thinking: will I find my mother alive or not? She was alive - what a joy! what a meeting! .. Gradually it began to fade away. There were times when she would ring the bell, I would come, and she would tell me: “I’m sad without you, let’s be together.” And there were times when I myself felt unbearable. I went up to her, leaving my work, and said: “It hurts me without you.” And she consoled me about her dying and her death. And so we gradually went into eternity together, because when she died, she took with her all my love for her, everything that was between us. And there was so much between us! We lived almost our entire lives together, only the first years of emigration we lived apart, because there was nowhere to live together. But then we lived together, and she knew me deeply. And once she told me: “How strange: the more I know you, the less I could say about you, because every word I would say about you would have to be corrected with some additional features.” Yes, we reached the point when we knew each other so deeply that we could not say anything about each other, but we could join in life, in dying and in death.
And so we must remember that everyone dying in a situation where any kind of callousness, indifference or desire “for it to finally end” is unbearable. A person feels this, knows it, and we must learn to overcome all the dark, gloomy, bad feelings in ourselves and, forgetting about ourselves, think deeply, peer, and get used to the other person. And then death becomes victory: O death, where is your sting?! O death, where is your victory? Christ has risen, and not one of the dead is in the tomb...
I want to say something else about death because what I have already said is very personal. Death surrounds us all the time, death is the fate of all humanity. Now there are wars, people are dying in terrible suffering, and we must learn to be calm in relation to our own death, because in it we see life, eternal life emerging. Victory over death, over the fear of death, lies in living deeper and deeper into eternity and introducing others to this fullness of life.
But before death there are other moments. We don’t die right away, we don’t just physically die out. Very strange phenomena happen. I remember one of our old women, Maria Andreevna, a wonderful little creature, who once came to me and said: “Father Anthony, I don’t know what to do with myself: I can’t sleep anymore. Throughout the night, images of my past rise in my memory, but not light ones, but only dark, bad images that torment me. I turned to the doctor and asked him to give me some sleeping pills, but sleeping pills don’t relieve this haze. When I take sleeping pills, I am no longer able to separate these images from myself, they become delirium, and I feel even worse. What should I do?" I then told her: “Maria Andreevna, you know, I don’t believe in reincarnation, but I believe that we have been given by God to experience our lives more than once, not in the sense that you will die and come back to life again, but in the sense that what is happening to you now. When you were young, you, within the narrow limits of your understanding, sometimes did wrong; in word, thought, and action they defamed themselves and others. Then you forgot this and at different ages continued, to the best of your understanding, to act like, again, humiliating, desecrating, defaming yourself. Now, when you no longer have the strength to resist the memories, they pop up, and each time they pop up, they seem to say to you: Maria Andreevna, now what are you over eighty years old, almost ninety - if you were in the same position that you are now I remember when you were twenty, thirty, forty, fifty years old, would you have acted as you did then? If you can look deeply at what happened then, at your condition, at events, at people and say: no, now, with my life experience, I could never say this murderous word, I could not do that what I did! - if you can say this with your whole being: with your thought, and your heart, and your will, and your flesh - it will leave you. But other, more and more other images will come. And every time the image comes, God will pose the question to you: is this your past sin or is it still your present sin? Because if you once hated a person and did not forgive him, did not reconcile with him, then the sin of that time is your present sinfulness; she has not left you and will not leave until you repent.”
I can give another example of the same kind. I was once called by the family of one of our decrepit old women, a bright, bright woman. She clearly should have died that day. She confessed, and finally I asked her: “Tell me, Natasha, have you forgiven everyone and everything, or do you still have some kind of thorn in your soul?” She replied: “I have forgiven everyone except my son-in-law; I’ll never forgive him!” I said to this: “In this case, I will not give you a prayer of permission and will not commune the Holy Mysteries; you will go to God's judgment and will answer before God for your words." She says: “After all, I will die today!” - “Yes, you will die without a prayer of permission and without communion, if you do not repent and reconcile. I will return in an hour" - and left. When I returned an hour later, she met me with a shining gaze and said: “How right you were! I I called my son-in-law, we explained ourselves, reconciled - he is now coming to see me, and I hope we will kiss each other to death, and I will enter eternity reconciled with everyone.”
Nika Kravchuk
Parents' Memorial Saturday - a time to pray for deceased relatives
With God, everyone is alive - the expression is known to many. Death in Orthodoxy is perceived as a door to another life, where a person perceives and feels everything, but cannot pray for himself. Therefore, it is customary in the church to offer prayers for the departed. There are also special days - parental memorial Saturdays. One of them is Dmitrievskaya, which precedes the day of remembrance of the Great Martyr Demetrius of Thessalonica (November 8).
- Meat-eating (universal parent);
- 2nd week of Great Lent;
- 3rd week of Great Lent;
- 4th week of Great Lent;
- Radonitsa (on the 9th day after Easter);
- May 9 - commemoration of deceased soldiers;
- Trinity (before the Feast of Pentecost);
- Dmitrievskaya memorial Saturday.
Two of them - Myasopustnaya and Troitskaya - have the status of “universal”. That is, these days the Church prays for all baptized Orthodox Christians. In general, all of them are called parental, since at this time they remember, first of all, the closest people - parents and relatives.
In 2015, Demetrius Memorial Saturday falls on November 7, the eve of the feast day of St. Demetrius of Thessaloniki. It has been known as a date of special commemoration since 1380. Then the Church prayed for those who died during the battle on the Kulikovo Field. But already in the sources of the 15th century it appears as a day when they pray for all the dead, and not just for soldiers.
Why remember the dead in the temple?
Deceased relatives, like no one else, need prayer help. After death, a person goes through ordeal - a private trial, after which it becomes known where the person will stay until the Second Coming. If everything is clear with the righteous - they deserve the heavenly abodes, then sinners still have a chance to make their path easier. How? Only through the prayers of relatives and the Church.
Therefore, every candle, every particle at the proskomedia, every alms, every loaf of bread brought to the temple during commemoration, every note and sincere prayer can help people dear to us get closer to the Kingdom of Heaven.
How is prayer for the deceased different during parental memorial Saturdays?
The Church has a special service for those who have passed into another world, which is called a memorial service. A joint appeal to the Lord is required so that He will forgive the sins of the deceased and grant them eternal bliss. Its final part is called litia - a short prayer appeal to God, which can be read even by a layman at home or in a cemetery. Memorial Saturdays are sometimes also called parental memorial services.
On Friday evening, parastas is served - a special evening service. It is also called the Great Requiem Service, or the Funeral Vigil. His distinctive feature is that at this time the Immaculates (17th kathisma from the Psalter, it is usually read for the dead) and the full canon are sung.
Why do they bring food to the temple?
It is customary to bring food to funeral services, which is placed on the eve - a table with a crucifix. It is on such a table that candles for repose are usually placed. This is also part of our help to our deceased neighbor.
Surely many have witnessed how even people who are generally distant from the Church handed out cookies and sweets on the day of remembrance of their deceased relatives. This is not at all accidental - the Church believes that we can help our loved ones through prayer and alms given for them.
Therefore, at the funeral service in particular, and during memorial Saturdays, they bring various food products - from bakery products before home canning. There are no rules, everyone is guided by own desires and income. Very often they bring bread and sugar. The first symbolizes Christ (in the Gospel Jesus says about himself: I am the Bread of Life), and the second symbolizes the sweetness of being in the Kingdom of Heaven. The brought Cahors is used for communion.
The food brought to the temple is then distributed to church employees (singers, those who usually work for free behind the candle box, clean up) and to everyone in need (very often parishes help the poor, the homeless, and large families).
***
Your prayer during your parents' memorial Saturday will be a small thank you to your loved ones who have passed on to another world. Remember all those times when these people were nearby and helped you in the most difficult situations, supported in difficult times. Today you can support them with your sincere prayer, participation in church commemoration and distribution of alms.
Demetrius Memorial Saturday closes the cycle of days of special prayer for the dead. Of course, it is possible to perform a service for those who have passed on to another world on other days. But in these seven certain days There is special power: all Orthodox Christians in different churches, cities and villages simultaneously turn to God with a common request - to grant endless life to their deceased relatives.
Take it for yourself and tell your friends!
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The Orthodox tradition pays great attention to the memory of the deceased. Dead Christians are remembered in churches several times a year on Saturdays. But there is a special, parental Saturday, when funeral services are held in the church, paying attention specifically to deceased relatives, and people hold wakes and visit cemeteries. Due to the many years of negative attitude of the Soviet government towards religion, when traditions and rituals were banned and some customs were forgotten, now many are at a loss as to how to spend parental Saturday.
In particular, people are concerned about what they should and shouldn’t do on this day, what they should take with them to the cemetery and to church. Our ancestors tried to spend parental Saturday with dignity, filled with events as much as possible, since, according to tradition, it was necessary to have time to complete a lot of tasks and rituals. Let’s take a closer look at how to properly remember the dead on Parents’ Saturday, and how it differs from other days.
IN Orthodox calendar There are several commemoration dates per year. But the most revered among the people are those that precede major religious holidays, such as Trinity, Maslenitsa, and Intercession. Despite the name “parental”, this does not mean that this Saturday is intended to commemorate exclusively one’s deceased fathers and mothers. This name, rather, comes from the root “clan”, since traditionally people remember their closest relatives first, but then all their deceased acquaintances.
The following key memorial days are highlighted:
- Meat Saturday;
- Radonitsa;
- Trinity;
- Dimitrovskaya.
On the eve of the celebration of Maslenitsa week, before Lent, in all Orthodox churches There is a universal, or big parental Saturday - the day of remembrance of ancestors. This parental Saturday before Easter is also called Meat Saturday. This name is due to the fact that this Saturday falls before the meat day - the last day of the year before Lent, when believers can afford to eat meat.
There is also a separate date that comes not before, but after a major Christian holiday. This is parental Saturday after Easter, also called Radonitsa. It is celebrated on the ninth day after Easter Sunday, and it always falls on Tuesday, but folk tradition They want to go to the cemetery on Saturday. As a rule, this day is celebrated in April, unless Easter is late (then Radonitsa falls in May). The specific number of Radonitsa can be found out on the calendar, since it is directly tied to Easter, which, as you know, happens on different dates every year.
The next major Saturday is celebrated on the eve of the celebration of Trinity. This parental memorial day differs from others in that traditionally people used it in ritual actions a large number of greenery and flowers. Important people also attach importance to Dmitrievskaya parental Saturday, which is celebrated in early November. This is the last special Saturday of the year, and therefore the people prepared for it especially carefully.
Dmitrievsky parent memorial day is also traditionally intended for special commemoration of the soldiers who fell for their homeland.
Important moments of parent's Saturday
The key event of any parent's Saturday is going to church and then to the cemetery. The funeral Divine Liturgy is served in churches, in the churchyard priests perform requiem services over the graves, and people in the church and at home read special prayers for the repose of the souls of the dead. To spend Parenting Saturday correctly, you need to go to church a little earlier than the service. This is necessary in order to have time to submit a note of repose at the church. In this note, indicate the names given to the deceased relatives and friends at baptism (sometimes they do not coincide with the worldly names of the people).
In addition, on Parents' Saturday it is not customary to go to church empty-handed. According to a long-standing tradition, a special table for offerings is installed in the temple. For this purpose, it is customary to bring food, usually lean food, as well as red Cahors wine to the church, which is then used for the liturgy. Please note that other types of alcohol, such as vodka or cognac, cannot be brought as an offering to the house of God. It is interesting that previously there was a custom for the whole world to gather food and wine, and after the service in the courtyard of the temple one was served big table, behind which the parishioners then commemorated their deceased relatives. Nowadays this tradition can still be found in small towns or villages, but for the most part it has already disappeared from modern life. Nowadays, the products that were brought by parishioners on Parents' Saturday are used for the needs of the parish and to help the poor.
According to Orthodox church rules, the deceased should be properly remembered in this way. You need to come to church twice - first on the eve of parental Saturday and then in the morning on the memorial day. On Friday, go to the evening service, during which the Great Requiem and Parastas are celebrated. Then go to church again in the morning to attend Divine Liturgy and a general funeral service. According to the clergy, it is very important to pray for the dead, since only prayer can help them find peace. Few people foresaw their departure from life and managed to communicate with the priest who absolved them of their sins. Therefore, only living relatives can remove the burden of sins from them, who with their fervent prayers ask the Almighty for forgiveness for the deceased.
After the service on Parents' Saturday, it is customary to go straight to the cemetery. There you need to tidy up the grave and the area next to it, change the flowers on the grave. It is permissible to remember the dead at the cemetery by sipping a little alcohol and having a snack. But official church is categorically against large feasts in the cemetery. The main memorial dinner on parents' Saturday should be held after returning home. There you can gather relatives and, at a set table, remember with a kind word your deceased relatives and close friends.
Don’t forget to give alms on the way to and from the cemetery and treat the beggars, who can often be found at the churchyard gates, with food. This gesture of mercy corresponds to one of the key dogmas of Orthodoxy - to help your neighbor.
Controversial issues
Many people are worried about whether it is permissible to do their usual household chores on parental Saturday - doing laundry or doing housework. The clergy have no prohibitions on this matter. Moreover, the special Sabbath initially implies that a person must definitely go to the cemetery in order to:
- clean up the area there;
- if necessary, adjust the cross;
- repair the fence;
- paint the tombstone.
Women need to set the funeral table, which is also a type of work. And we need to treat the beggars to the pie so that they will pray for the departed. therefore, you can safely do everything planned and not worry about prohibitions on physical labor on parent’s day. On the other hand, the priests point out at that moment that no work should be an obstacle to attending church on parental Saturday and the day before it and listening to the service.
There are also a number of questions regarding other worldly matters that fall on parental Saturday. In particular, there are situations when newlyweds set a wedding date without checking with church calendar, and as a result, their wedding falls on their parents’ Saturday. When they find out about this, they begin to worry and fill their heads with unpleasant superstitions about this. Although the priests have a more loyal view on this issue than one might imagine. The clergy say that on Saturday weddings are not held in church, and you can sign at the registry office freely. Another thing is that it’s not entirely convenient to have a wedding on the eve of major events. religious holidays, as, for example, on Trinity Parents' Saturday. The first days of summer are considered the beginning of the time for weddings, and therefore many newlyweds find themselves in a double situation on Trinity Day. According to the priests, believers on this day should be absorbed in preparations for the celebration of Trinity - one of the largest religious holidays. This means that people need to go to the evening service the day before and confess. Therefore, a wedding on this parent’s Saturday may be unacceptable.
If the wedding date for Trinity Saturday has already been set, and it is not possible to change it, folk wisdom I have a few rituals that will help me come to terms with this. It was believed that on the morning before the celebration, the newlyweds should each visit the cemetery separately to place fresh flowers on the graves of their closest relatives. In the event that one of the parents of the newlyweds did not live to see this solemn day, it is important for the two of them to come to the grave to ask the deceased for a blessing for the marriage.
Ancient traditions of parental Saturdays
A huge layer of rituals associated with parental Saturdays has been preserved to this day. There are also many signs that people still pay attention to. For example, rain was expected on Radonitsa. A shower or light rain meant that a rich harvest would be harvested in the fall. People even tried to invite rain by looking at the clouds. If the heavens had mercy on their requests and the first drops fell, then everyone hurried to collect rainwater in their palms to wash themselves with it. This ritual was believed to bring happiness and good luck. And young girls and women used rainwater in even more intricate ways. They collected it in a container intended for this purpose and then put gold or silver rings into the water - whoever had what wealth. Our ancestors believed that this ritual kept girls youthful and pretty.
Even more unusual traditions have been preserved on Trinity Parents' Saturday. Our ancestors were sure that on Parental Saturday their deceased relatives could temporarily go out into the world of the living to communicate with their loved ones. It was believed that on the eve of Trinity, their spirits were hidden in the greenery - flowers, bushes, herbs and trees. Therefore, people rushed to visit the cemetery on this day to decorate the graves of the deceased with fresh green herbs and bright flowers.
Like Radonitsa, Trinity Memorial Saturday in the old days was divided into three parts.
If everything is clear with the first two points, then what happened in the evening parent's day? Elderly people stayed at home and spent the evening praying, but young people gathered for fun. It should be noted that parental Saturdays were not only days of remembrance of the dead, but also a kind of holiday praising life. On Trinity Parents' Saturday, young people gathered together near the reservoir. On the shores of lakes or rivers they lit large fires and had fun.
And here Dmitrievskaya Saturday famous for its feasts. If on the parents' Saturday after Easter the funeral table should have been covered with Easter dishes, then in the fall the key dish of the parents memorial day there were a variety of pies. According to tradition, preparations for this day began on Friday. On Friday evening, after finishing dinner, the housewives completely cleared the table and covered it with a fresh tablecloth. Then the table was set with new food. With this symbolic gesture, the souls of the deceased were invited to the table. After this, all family members had to wash thoroughly in the bathhouse. The last person to visit the steam room left water and a broom in a tub so that the deceased relatives could freshen up.
On Parents' Saturday, after the traditional visit to the church and cemetery, people began a large funeral meal. On this day, the housewives set a rich table. The main dishes were the favorite food of the deceased relatives. They also certainly put it on the table;
- pancakes;
- uzvar (compote made from dried fruits);
- kutya;
- jelly;
- roast;
- pies.
According to tradition, pies on this day had to be oblong. Also, another tradition associated with pies concerned people who had recently gotten married. Those who got married in October were required to prepare a special funeral cake and take it with them to the cemetery.
There was also a special ritual on this parental Saturday. A clean plate intended for the deceased was placed on the table with the funeral dinner. Each participant in the funeral meal put a spoonful of food from his plate on this dish. This plate was not removed at night. It was believed that the souls of the dead were treated to dinner at night.
Modern people partially continue to follow the traditions of their ancestors. A striking example is that at a funeral meal there is always an empty plate and a glass covered with a piece of bread. From the point of view of the clergy, this is nothing more than a relic pagan traditions, since in Christian faith there is no such ritual. But many priests are lenient towards such actions of members of their parish. But what, in their opinion, must be done on Parents’ Saturday is to attend church.
In the event that a person cannot come to church due to illness or is on the road that day, then you just need to pray for the souls of the dead. Prayer is of key importance, and you can come to the cemetery to remove the grave of your deceased relatives on any other convenient day.