What is a complex
Before getting rid of complexes, it’s worth thinking about why we need them and what they really are.Thus, the classic of psychology Jung considered complexes to be another personality living inside us, more precisely, the shadow side of our self, which sometimes breaks out. Complexes control those parts of the body that you hate and therefore can cause various diseases.
But modern psychologists believe that the complex is the source of our strength. Why? Yes, because sick, depressed and unhappy people often become the leaders in the family, and sometimes learn to manipulate their bosses, friends and relatives. This is a kind of energy vampirism, but we have a lot of our own energy, it’s just often shackled...in the shackles of complexes.
How to get rid of complexes and teach yourself to love in order to remove these shackles?
1. Find out the reasonThink about what complexes are preventing you from living, and then think about where all this comes from? Does it seem to you that people are whispering behind your back, it seems that your bosses are dissatisfied with you, it seems that you have an ugly figure, it seems that you are bad? Keyword-Seems. As for appearance, we actually seem much scarier to ourselves than to others. And the opposite sex has completely different ideas about beauty than we think. We are the only ones to blame for the emergence of our complexes, as well as our low self-esteem, uncertainty and suspicion. By the way, you are very interested in whether there is a capillary network on your neighbor’s skin, do you often pay attention to it? So most people around you don’t care that you have pimples on your forehead: people are too preoccupied with their own troubles to think about a couple of your pimples. No, this is exaggerated, of course, but close to the truth.
2. We assess the situation soberly.
Are there really people who have everything in order: family, money, friends, character... everything is perfect? There are none, that’s the point. Even a lady or Mr. Perfect will have shortcomings and reasons to feel complex, it’s just that some people don’t focus on them and don’t focus their attention on them, while others only think about them, which really attracts the attention of others. Just think that you are not the only one, but someone else faces more serious shortcomings and lives without restrictions. Life will immediately become easier. And someone even kills and robs, without thinking about how bad he is, and at the same time they even respect him...
3.Getting rid of fears
This refers to fear of public opinion. You can’t build your whole life focusing only on it, and it’s not always negative. So don’t be afraid to be ridiculous or funny, don’t be afraid to express yourself and even make mistakes... just take the world more simply and don’t think about every step, and then don’t chew on every word you say or hear. Also, don’t try to please everyone at once: it’s impossible and unrealistic. And don’t get hung up on mistakes: you’re not a robot, and they make them too... Over time, there will be fewer complexes.
4. Let’s go “by contradiction”!
If you're afraid of looking ridiculous, try being ridiculous all day. It’s better, however, to do this with close friends who will understand or on vacation. Immerse yourself in your entire complex, savor it and... forget it!
5. We believe in ourselves and love ourselves!
This is not taught anywhere, so everyone should have their own formula for self-love and self-confidence. In order to love yourself, you need to realize that you don’t have to break into a wall where there are no doors. Well, you won’t grow taller than nature gave you, so why bother gnawing at your baldness because of this? You won’t grow up, and you’ll even get bald spots! This means you need to accept yourself as you are and understand why it’s good to be you and not another person.
Believing in yourself is even easier. Just know that you can do everything and will do everything, and you also have the right to make mistakes. Try to write down on a piece of paper all the qualities that you cannot boast of, but would like to have. Read your list daily and out loud, and over time you will definitely have these qualities! Well, exclude the particle “not” from the vocabulary: they don’t understand, they couldn’t, they don’t like, they don’t appreciate...
6. We act actively
All of the above does not mean that you need to sit down and admire your shortcomings in the hope that they will go away on their own. Neither excess weight nor feelings of inferiority will go away unless you take care of your body or start making contact with people...
The most interesting thing is to put specific task, the achievement of which will help in overcoming complexes. By the way, working on yourself, or rather, the fact of its existence, will help you increase your self-esteem, and this will help in overcoming all complexes.
7. Treat mistakes wisely
IN school years you were probably scolded by your teachers. They scolded everyone, but some convinced themselves that they were bad and somehow unfinished, while others tried to do something with mathematics, which was not easy. Teachers are people too, and so are parents, but often they do not give us the right to make mistakes. And you have it, and you always have a chance to fix it too.
We have more of them than shortcomings. Write down all your positive traits. If you don’t find it, ask others and you will understand that they think about you better than it seems. And what you accept as a flaw, your loved ones can highly value and love. Focus on what you can do better than others.
9. Don’t compare yourself to anyone!
There will always be someone who is better. But firstly, this does not mean that you cannot achieve the same, and secondly, you can always be better than yourself yesterday.
10. Love life.
Know that she is beautiful and too short to be killed by sadness and despondency, as well as self-criticism.
Do you have any complexes? Do they interfere with your life? We have tips for you on how to get rid of complexes! Destroy your complexes and be happy!
Welcome, dear reader, to the useful website Success Diary! 😉
We all live in a constantly evolving world.
The earth is a huge organism living its own life.
Every day thousands of people are born on Earth who live, suffer and...
No matter how different people are, they all have the same trait - some kind of complex.
Some are successful get rid of their complexes, others just can’t cope with them.
In this article we will look at what complexes are, where they come from and how you can cope with complexes!
Complexes are a person’s thoughts that limit all his actions and actions.
In other words, in the head of every person there is an invisible limiter on some of his words or actions.
While this limiter is in the “on” mode, a person is not able to do some things.
Where does this limiter come from?
Yes, you just create it for yourself!!!
For example, a teacher at school criticizes Petrov’s essay and comments on the mistakes to the whole class.
What is Petrov thinking at this time?
Instead of taking notes and correcting mistakes, he thinks: “That’s it, I’m stupid, I don’t know anything and I can’t do anything.”
This is how the first complex appears.
However, there is good news!
Reflecting how to get rid of complexes, each person can independently switch his limiter to “off” mode and remove all restrictions from himself.
To do this, you only need to take 5 extremely simple steps.
So let's get started.
How to get rid of complexes: instructions!
Before you get rid of complexes, understand the problem
First, sit down and in a calm environment think about all your complexes.
On a piece of paper, write down all your thoughts without concealment.
Once your list is ready, prioritize it, starting with the most important.
This work must be done, first of all, in order to identify all existing problems.
We identify the cause of the problem and begin to get rid of complexes
When the list is ready, we take the most important complex and analyze it.
In most cases, it seems to us that those around us do not like us, look askance, friends whisper behind our backs, etc.
However, what is the key word here?
That’s right – “it seems to us”!
What should we do when it seems to us?
Remember!!!
All these logical chains take place only in our brain, but not in reality.
There's nothing you can do, but that's just how people are - some people worry about a bad haircut, while others think that the whole world is looking at their pimple on their nose.
Let's think together...
Do you know that sick and depressed people become the most important people in the family? Why?
Yes, because all the attention of family and friends is focused only on this one person! Therefore, the inferiority complex is the source of his strength.
This depressed person constantly complains that he feels bad, that he feels weak, and despite all this, he is the strongest among us all. No matter how rude it may sound, they suppress healthy people!
This should not surprise us, since in this case it is the disease that can give a certain power!
And if you ask yourself the question: “Who are the strongest among people?” I’ll tell you right away - babies! Why?
Yes, because it is babies who rule us, but they themselves remain uncontrollable...That's why analyze real facts and find out the reason for your complexes.
In most cases, any complex appears from fear.
And having conquered fear, you can easily get rid of all complexes.
For example, you are afraid to meet girls.
Having found out the reason for such fear, you gradually...
Often, when meeting a girl, the following thoughts arise in a guy’s brain: I’m poorly dressed, I don’t know what to say, I don’t have money with me, etc.
By understanding the true cause of fear, you can easily eliminate the internal barrier.
After all, before meeting someone, you can dress up, take some money and think about the topic of the conversation.
Take action and you will understand how to get rid of complexes
No matter how many books you read on a similar topic, they will not help you if you do not act.Naturally, acting can sometimes be oh so scary.
After all, it’s much easier to crawl under the covers, curl up and be angry at the whole world.
But this won't help!
When you start doing the exercises, you may feel that it is stressing you out.
You immediately start looking for reasons why you shouldn’t do these exercises.
This is absolutely normal!
Beginning fight complexes, you step out of your comfort zone and fear starts to nip in your heels.
Don't be afraid of this condition.
Show your body who is boss and don’t stop, go towards your goal!
Cutting out fear
As you already understand, fear is the cause of all our failures.
If we obey fear, then all our lives we will be afraid of the opinions of others.
Fear will never allow us to change a job we hate, expand our social circle, sign up for a cancan, etc.
We will live our whole lives in fear and worry about public opinion.
But answer the question: do you care how your neighbor from next door is dressed, but how she wears makeup?
Or maybe you are worried about the capillary network on her buttocks?
Then why should she care about you?
Don’t try to please absolutely everyone – that’s not possible.
The main thing is that you must like yourself and be individual!
Appreciate your strengths, get rid of your weaknesses
Usually we think about our shortcomings, talk about them, harp on them over a bottle of beer, but completely forget about our own merits.
We always downplay our strengths and exaggerate our weaknesses.
Do you agree?
Tell me, do you know at least one person with ideal appearance, career, marital status and friends?
Personally, the only thing that comes to mind is iron Man, but it’s not real, and therefore doesn’t count.
No person is perfect.
Some people have protruding ears, some are not very intelligent, some are bad at sports.
But why shout about it at every corner?
Protruding ears can be covered with hair, the absence of intelligence can be replaced with strength, and the absence of strength with intelligence.
Therefore, from this day on, try to remain silent about your shortcomings and talk about your advantages.
Within a few days you will notice positive metamorphoses taking place in your mind and you will easily get rid of complexes.
simple but very effective advice how to overcome your complexes:
Don't let your complexes take power over you.
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Instructions
First, you need to determine the reason for your complex. Think about what specifically you are not happy with about yourself. The root of the problem can be very different. Most complexes come from childhood: many are teased by their peers, which deeply hurts especially sensitive children. Perhaps someday close person abandoned you, or someone systematically insulted you, joked evilly about your shortcomings. It happens that a strong emotional shock takes you out of the game, depriving you of a sense of self-confidence. Help in the search the real reason complex psychologists can.
After identifying the problem, you need to take action. Fight your fears. If, for example, you cannot speak in public, try to overcome your fear. You can start small: make a toast in family circle, make a small announcement in front of your work colleagues, etc.
Love yourself. You should always remember that every person is unique, and so are you. Take a piece of paper and try to list your positive qualities or achievements. When your advantages are recorded, you will feel important and powerful. Don't forget to praise yourself. Personal recognition is most important. Every morning in front of the mirror, smile, tell yourself that you look great, and you will succeed.
Do whatever makes you feel confident. Dress in clothes that are comfortable for you. If you feel comfortable and confident in business suit– buy a suit, prefer sports shoes – wear sneakers or moccasins, consider yourself overweight – exercise at least twenty minutes a day. If you have skin problems, visit a cosmetologist. Remember that no matter how perfect your appearance is, what is inside plays a much more important role. Therefore, it is necessary to improve your knowledge.
Make plans for the future. Success is achieved by those who are not afraid to set themselves difficult tasks. Learn foreign language or learn to play the guitar, become a professional in your field. Of course, it’s not easy to achieve all this, but you set your own deadline.
Try to start new life. Divide everything into “before” and “after”. And leave your complexes in the past, you no longer need them. Tell yourself: “I can do anything. I . There have been and will be quite a few obstacles in my life, but I have dealt with them and will continue to deal with them with ease.”
Video on the topic
People whose lives are poisoned complexes, much more than meets the eye. Not too demanding of their partner, place of work and income, they are content with the role of gray mice. And few people realize that behind this complex image there may be a bright, interesting personality hidden.
Instructions
Analyze where your complexes came from. You can do this either independently or with the help of a psychotherapist. Perhaps you got them because your classmates teased you, or because your parents were always dissatisfied with your achievements. Think about why these people treated you this way at one time. For example, your classmates might tease you for having plump lips, and your mother, who had to give up dancing as a child, tried to make her dream come true with your help and severely scolded you for every failure.
Think about whether their accusations are justified for you at the moment, when your plump lips have become sexy and are a source of your pride, and you are a welcome guest at any disco.
Write down your talents, skills and positive qualities on a piece of paper. Ask your loved ones to complement it.
Try not to communicate with people who constantly criticize and find fault with you. If this is a relative, reduce communication with him to a minimum. If your boss is nagging you about little things, consider changing jobs.
Being very thin or too tall, freckles on the face, small breasts, long nose - these or similar gloomy thoughts prevent many women from being self-confident, lower self-esteem and prevent them from building normal relationships with people around them. How to learn to accept and love yourself, get rid of complexes and insecurities?
What are complexes and how do they arise?
The very concept of “complex” was first introduced by the Austrian physician, physiologist Joseph Breuer. Complexes are a person’s distorted idea of his own physical and moral shortcomings. Exaggeration of non-existent flaws is always accompanied by strong feelings: fear, anxiety, shame. It seems to you that you are not worthy of the company of successful and prosperous people, that you do not deserve prosperity and happiness.
Many complexes from childhood. An unpleasant review, a careless word from an adult, spoken in an emotional outburst, leaves a painful mark on the soul and is remembered by the child for many years.
Often the source of complexes is negative comparisons: “My friend is beautiful and successful, not like me!” Comparing yourself to others, or hearing such comparisons from people close to you whose opinions matter to you, can make you feel inferior and deprived.
Another important reason for the emergence of complexes is fear. Fear of looking funny in the eyes of others, fear of doing or saying something wrong. If you live with a constant eye on the opinions of other people, then sooner or later you will begin to be overcome by uncertainty and complexes will appear. To overcome complexes, psychologists advise taking a number of simple but effective steps.
Find out the reason
Do you know how you developed complexes? It seems to you that others do not like your character or appearance. It seems that representatives of the opposite sex are completely indifferent and do not even look in your direction. Management seems to constantly find fault with your work. Do you understand what the key word is? That's right - it seems! There can be a great many indirect reasons, but the main one is that only you are to blame for your complexes. Low self-esteem, self-doubt, suspiciousness, suspicion - these are the qualities of your character that are the basis for the appearance of complexes. Therefore, in order to get rid of complexes, you need to change yourself.
Analyze the situation objectively
Remember that no matter how successful a person is, he will also have shortcomings and reasons for complexes. IN real life there is no ideal. It’s just that some people don’t focus on their flaws and weaknesses, while others, on the contrary, only think about them. Although this is precisely why they attract the attention of others to their weaknesses. Accept that everyone has flaws and let it go.
Get rid of fear
To cope with complexes, it is very important to overcome the fear of public opinion. Allow yourself to be free and not look at other people's opinions. Don't be afraid to make mistakes. Only those who do nothing make no mistakes. Express yourself, try something new, don’t be afraid to seem funny. Don't try to please everyone around you. Treat the world around you more simply and the burden of complexes will fall off your shoulders.
Believe in yourself
Let your motto in life be: “I will try, I can, I will succeed!” Prove to yourself that everything is possible, you just have to try. Use psychological techniques and exercises. Write down on a piece of paper a list of qualities that you would like to acquire. Re-read your list daily, say it out loud, and over time you will definitely acquire the desired qualities. Another piece of advice from psychologists is to eliminate the particle “not” from your speech and from your life. Stop saying: “they don’t like”, “they don’t appreciate”, “they don’t understand”, “they don’t support”.
Set goals and take action
To achieve results, you will need effort and active action. You won't lose weight unless you eat right and start going to the gym. If you do not try to find a common language with your work colleagues and management, your professional inferiority complex will not decrease. Set yourself clear and specific goals that will allow you to overcome your complexes.
Focus on your strengths
By constantly thinking about your shortcomings, you forget what you have and positive sides and there are much more of them. Remember the training with the list, it will also come in handy here. Just now write down all your positive qualities. Ask your friends why they value you, and ask your family and friends why they love you. Rest assured, they will tell you many advantages that you didn’t even know about. You will understand how you look in the eyes of others. You will also be surprised to learn that some qualities that you considered your flaw are perceived by others as yours. characteristic feature and advantage.
Take care of the beauty of your soul
You are unique and unrepeatable, that is your beauty. Look around and you will see that a woman who gathers a crowd of friends and admirers around her does not have ideal external characteristics. She's just charming, cheerful, sociable, kind. People are attracted to the inner light. Develop and cultivate femininity, generosity, gentleness and other positive qualities and people will definitely be drawn to you.
Complexes... They appear from nowhere and ruin the life of their owner. They depress, cause depression, make a person perceive himself distortedly and believe that others perceive him the same way. How to get rid of complexes, erasing them from your life forever? The secrets of success in the fight against these enemies of the human psyche are in our article.In order to get rid of complexes, you need to take the following steps:
1. Find out the cause of the complex. Do you know where the legs of our complexes come from? It often seems to us that others don’t like us in some way. It seems that the boss is not satisfied with the quality of our work. It seems that the opposite sex does not like you because you are ugly. It seems that friends are whispering about something behind their backs. Notice what the key word is here? That's right - it seems to us. Therefore, there may be indirect reasons a large number of, but the real reason is one and only - we ourselves are to blame for the emergence of complexes. Low self-esteem, suspicion, lack of self-confidence - these are the qualities that serve as good soil for the appearance of complexes. Means, the only way fight complexes - change yourself!
2. Soberly assess the situation. Do you think there is a person in the world for whom everything in life is perfect: appearance, career, and Family status, and friends? It is unlikely that there will be such a lucky person. Everyone has shortcomings - accordingly, a reason for complexes. However, if some people do not focus on their shortcomings, others only think about them. And at the same time, they draw the attention of others to their weaknesses. Therefore, you should honestly admit to yourself: “I’m not the only one, all people have shortcomings” - and it will immediately become much easier!
3. Get rid of fear. An important step towards overcoming complexes is the ability to overcome fear, first of all, fear of public opinion. Do we really have to do everything in our lives with an eye on the opinions of others? And is it always as reprehensible as we think? In any case, don’t be afraid to express yourself, don’t be afraid to make mistakes, and finally, don’t be afraid to be funny! Try to relate more simply to the world around you, stop thinking about your every step, don’t try to please everyone around you (after all, this is simply impossible!) - and the burden of complexes will gradually fall off your shoulders.
4. Believe in yourself.“I can, I can!” - should be your motto. Inspire yourself that everything in this life is achievable. A simple one will help with this psychological training: Take a piece of paper and write on it a list of qualities that you do not possess, but would really like to acquire. Reread this list every day, saying it out loud. We guarantee that over time you will acquire these qualities. Also eliminate from your life the particle “not”: “they don’t like”, “they don’t understand”, “they don’t appreciate”.
5. Take active action. Psychological training is good, but the fight against complexes also requires active action. Excess weight will not go away unless you start going to the gym, and your inferiority complex will not decrease unless you try to establish contact with others. Set specific goals, the achievement of which will help you overcome your complexes. 
6. Think about your strengths. Focusing on our shortcomings, we often forget about our advantages, of which we undoubtedly have much more. The same training with a piece of paper can be repeated here - this time write your positive qualities on it. Are you too self-critical to make a list like this? Seek help from your family and friends. Rest assured, they will tell you a dozen or two of your advantages. At the same time, you will learn that you do not look like such an insignificance in the eyes of others.
7. Love life. Life is beautiful - remember that! Smile at every new day, at the people around you, at your own reflection in the mirror. Remember - life is too fleeting to waste it on despondency and sadness. Fighting complexes should be a pleasant and easy task - then they will recede forever.
We wish you success in the fight against complexes!