For a long time, the first Sunday after Easter - the so-called Red Hill - was the time of weddings in Rus'

This day was the first when weddings were allowed after a long break. The fact is that according to the church charter, a wedding was impossible as early as Maslenitsa, which is 9 weeks. Over time, the requirements of the church charter became overgrown with folk customs and beliefs. Until now, Krasnaya Gorka is one of the most popular periods for weddings among those couples who are not satisfied with registration at the registry office and would like to seal their union in the Church.

Why is a wedding necessary and what does it give?

First of all, I would like to note that a wedding is not necessary to create a family. Marriage, obviously, is created only by a mutual agreement between two loving friend people's friend. The essence of this agreement is very simple: mutual recognition of each other as husband and wife and taking responsibility for each other and for their future children. This agreement has nothing to do with the so-called marriage contract. We are talking about a mutual personal agreement of future spouses to create a family, to freely sacrifice their freedom, autonomy, and independence for the sake of love. Registration, recognition by relatives, wedding, wedding - all this is secondary to the mystery of the love of two people and their mutual decision to start a family.

No matter how strange it may seem, the wedding of every Christian couple is a relatively young tradition. In Byzantium for a long time Mostly rich people were married, while simple people limited to the blessing of the bishop and shared communion. In Rus', until the 15th-16th century, many peasant families were not married.

The wedding ceremony that we can observe now was formed by the 9-10 centuries in Byzantium. It represents some kind of synthesis church service and Greco-Roman folk wedding customs. For example, wedding rings. They came from the times when rings were common among the nobility - not only jewelry, but also a kind of seal that could be used to seal a legal document written on a wax tablet. By exchanging such seals (and there is still an understanding that the wife wears her husband’s ring and vice versa), the spouses entrusted each other with all their property as evidence of mutual trust and fidelity. This symbolic meaning was attached to the rings; they began to denote fidelity, unity, and the inseparability of the family union. Thanks to this, the exchange and putting on of marital rings became part of the liturgical ritual.

Like rings, crowns were also included in the liturgical rite. placed on the heads of the newlyweds, who appeared not only thanks to folk customs, but also to Byzantine ceremonies. In the church understanding, they testify to the royal dignity of the newlyweds, who will build their kingdom, their world, build as they wish, build for themselves and their children, and no one can interfere. They are free to choose their own advisers.

Before we talk about the meaning and effectiveness of a wedding, let’s focus on one thing: important point, which fundamentally distinguishes the Christian approach to marriage from some others. When we talk about a mutual agreement, about making a decision to start a family, then for Christians this means only one thing - this union is forever. There cannot be a family where there is an initial assumption that the family union is limited, where there is an initial assumption that there may be another marriage, better than the first. Marriage and personal faith for Christians are phenomena of the same order. To believe in God, to believe in God, is almost the same as to believe, to trust in the love of another person. If a person loves and is loved, if he wants to start a family, then he must take, as they say, a leap over the abyss, believe in his future family and take such a step after which there is no turning back.

If a mutual decision to create a family is made, then for its legitimacy at all times of human history, public evidence of mutual love and responsibility, in our time - this is the registration of marriage. This recognition by the public is important, firstly, to minimize cases of deception, quackery, self-interest, etc. Secondly, for the legal recognition of children and for solving any difficulties.

The ancient Romans distinguished two concepts, two types of relationships between men and women: family and concubinage. The latter means mutual cohabitation without any obligations and legal consequences. Concubinage is a completely legal phenomenon, both in ancient times and in our days. Any citizen of our country can choose the lifestyle that suits him.

So, for the wedding to be effective, the newlyweds must meet several conditions. The first of them: only married couples are married - husband and wife. In practice, this is expressed in the mandatory requirement that those wishing to get married have a state marriage certificate. A couple living in a concubinage cannot be married. The second condition: only a Christian family can be married - a union of a Christian man and a Christian woman. The third is understanding the essence of the wedding and accepting it.

A wedding is one of the forms of church blessing of a Christian marriage, but it does not give any benefits to the family, does not deprive it of difficulties, and does not protect it from divorce. At a wedding, God’s grace and mercy are not just taught, but, what is very important, help is given for specific task- to be precisely a Christian family, to be that island of love and peace where Christ reigns. We can say that in a wedding a task is set and the strength is given to solve it, but it depends on the people themselves whether they will accomplish this task or not.

Why does Christianity allow divorce, since divorce is always a tragedy? Orthodoxy looks at the family as a living organism; a wedding does not create it, but churchizes it. The life or death of this organism depends on the spouses themselves. The most important element Christian morality is the doctrine of freedom and areas of human responsibility, which even God does not encroach on. The integrity of the family is something that is in the hands of the spouses themselves, this is their area of ​​responsibility, this is something they themselves decided to do. If people do not have the strength to create a family, there is no love, there is no unity of life, then they are free to decide on divorce or, if they want to save the family, they can ask for help from loved ones, from psychologists, from priests or from God. But neither loved ones, nor psychologists, nor even God can forcibly keep people together, they can provide help, give strength, but the spouses themselves still need to live.

A wedding in a church is a sacred rite that gives a husband and wife a church blessing for a happy family life and the birth of children. Many couples decide to celebrate this beautiful and touching event. But in order for the ritual to be not just a tribute to fashion, but to become a serious, deliberate step, it is worth knowing its features.

Important conditions for a wedding

It is allowed to get married on the wedding day or after a period of time: a week, a month, years. The main thing is that all conditions provided by the church are met.

Who can get married?

An important condition for the ceremony is the presence of a marriage certificate. In addition, spouses must be baptized Orthodox Christians. However, in some cases, a wedding may be allowed if the spouse is a non-Orthodox Christian, provided that children born in marriage will be baptized in Orthodoxy. Compliance with the marriageable age is also important: the bride must be 16 years old, the groom - 18. There is no need to be afraid of refusal if the wife is pregnant, since, according to the church, children should be born in a married marriage. The wedding can be held even if the spouses have not received a parental blessing, since it can be replaced by the blessing of the confessor.

There are not many restrictions on the sacrament of marriage. The Church will not approve of the ritual between unbaptized, atheists, blood, and also spiritual relatives, for example, between godparents of the child, between godfather and godson. This ceremony is allowed to be held no more than three times. It is also prohibited to get married if this is already your fourth officially registered marriage.

When is the ceremony allowed?

Often newlyweds decide to get married on the day with the official registration of marriage. But, given that such a sacrament of Orthodoxy is a rather serious step, there is no need to rush into the ceremony: it can be postponed until the birth of a child or carried out after several years of official marriage.

This ritual is not performed every day. Newlyweds are married 4 days a week on Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. However, it is worth considering that there are 4 fasts throughout the year, during which church marriages are not celebrated:
- Rozhdestvensky - lasts November 28 - January 6;
- Great - seven weeks before Orthodox Easter;
- Petrov - depends on the date of Easter, lasts from 8 to 42 days;
- Uspensky - lasts from August 14 to August 27.

The church will also refuse to hold weddings on significant days:
- September 11 - Beheading of John the Baptist;
- September 27 - Exaltation of the Holy Cross;
- from January 7 to January 19 - Christmastide;
- on Maslenitsa;
- on Bright Week (the week after Easter).

Even if the day you choose does not fall on the listed dates, it is still better to go to church to clarify everything with the priest. In addition, the bride must calculate that there are no “critical days” on the chosen date, since it is impossible to appear in church at this time.

What should precede the wedding ceremony?

TO this ritual it is necessary to prepare spiritually. This means that before the wedding the bride and groom need to pray, confess, take communion, and undergo a three-day fast (it is necessary to abstain from food of animal origin). Newlyweds should not enter into carnal relations before marriage, and this condition also applies to a couple who decided to get married after several years of marriage. They need to refrain from intimate relationships for several days before the ceremony.

Preparation for the sacrament of wedding

Choosing a church, communicating with a priest

To decide where to get married, you can go to different churches and choose the church where you feel most comfortable. For a magnificent, solemn ceremony, a large cathedral is suitable, for a quiet, secluded ceremony - a small church. Since the priest is an important character in the ritual, it is worth taking a responsible approach to his choice.

You must register for the wedding ceremony in advance (several weeks in advance). It is also worth discussing all the issues with the priest in advance: the duration of the wedding, what you need to bring with you, whether it is possible to take photographs, etc. It is worth considering that this is a paid ceremony, but in some churches its exact cost is established, in others voluntary donations are provided. This issue should also be discussed with the priest. Moreover, they often provide “ Additional services", for example, bell ringing, church choir.

Selection of guarantors

Two guarantors (witnesses) are usually chosen from close relatives. It is worth considering that they must be baptized. It is not allowed to take divorced spouses or a couple living in an illegal, “civil” marriage as guarantors. Their spiritual responsibilities are similar to those of godparents: they must spiritually guide the family they are creating. Therefore, it is not customary to invite young people who are not familiar with married life to be guarantors. If difficulties arise when searching for witnesses, it is possible to carry out the sacrament of wedding without them.

Choosing an outfit

• Bride
  
  Wedding dress the bride should be no higher than her knees, should cover her shoulders and preferably her arms, should not have a deep neckline (you can use long gloves, a cape, bolero, an openwork shawl, a stole, etc.). It is advisable to give preference to light colors along with dark and bright ones (purple, blue, black) should be abandoned. Sundresses and trouser suits are not suitable for the ceremony. The bride must cover her head. Considering that during the ceremony the newlyweds wear church crowns (crowns), you should not cover the bride’s head with a large hat, as it will look inappropriate.

  You can wear any shoes, but when choosing them, you should take into account that you will have to stand in them for quite a long time, so it is better to avoid uncomfortable high-heeled shoes. To decide on a hairstyle, it is advisable to check with the priest in advance whether the crowns will be placed on the head or will be held by guarantors. The bride's makeup should not be too noticeable; it is also worth remembering that it is forbidden to kiss a crown, cross, or icon with painted lips.

  It is believed that a wedding dress cannot be given or sold. It must be stored together with baptismal shirts, wedding candles, and icons.

• Groom

  For a wedding, the groom will wear a formal suit. There are no special prohibitions regarding the color of the suit. You should not come to church in casual, denim, or sportswear. The groom should not have a hat.

• Guests

  Guests entering the temple must comply with the requirements for all parishioners: for women - clothing closed type, hats, trouser suits are not recommended, for men - formal clothing, without a headdress.

  In addition, all participants and those present at the wedding ceremony: the bride, groom, guarantors and guests must wear crosses.

What to prepare for the ceremony

For the wedding you will need:
- rings that must be given to the priest before the ceremony for consecration;
- wedding candles;
- wedding icons (images of Christ and the Virgin Mary);
- a white towel (the newlyweds will stand on it during the ceremony);
- two scarves (to hold candles).

The towel on which the bride and groom stood during the wedding in the temple symbolizes the path of life, so it must be kept and not given to anyone. You should also store wedding candles that can be lit when difficult birth, diseases of children.

Photographer's choice

It is important to note that making a video or photographing a wedding ceremony is not allowed in all churches. Therefore, it is worth discussing this issue with the priest in advance. Considering that the lighting in churches is specific, it is advisable to choose a professional photographer who will take into account the nuances of shooting, will be able to choose the right angles, and take high-quality photographs that convey the atmosphere of the temple and the grandeur of the wedding ceremony.

Wedding ceremony

This ritual includes engagement and wedding. It is worth considering that during the ceremony the priest must call the newlyweds by the names that were given to them at baptism (sometimes they differ from the names “in the world”). Engagement passes at the entrance to the church. The bride should stand to the left of the groom. The priest blesses the newlyweds and hands over lit wedding candles, which must be held until the end of the service. After the prayer, he changes the wedding rings three times from the man’s hand to the woman’s hand. After this they become the bride and groom.

Wedding is held in the center of the temple, where the bride and groom will stand on a white towel. During the ceremony, the priest reads prayers, and the guarantors hold crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. After answering the priest’s questions, “Is the wedding performed of one’s own free will?” “Are there any obstacles?” and reading prayers, the newlyweds become spouses before God. Now they can kiss their crowns and drink wine from a cup in three doses, which symbolizes family life with joys and sorrows. After the priest leads them around the lectern and leads them to the Royal Doors, the husband kisses the icon of Christ, and the wife kisses the Mother of God. Now guests can congratulate the newlyweds.

Remember that a wedding is not just a memorable, bright holiday, but also a very important step that should be taken once in a lifetime. It is possible to divorce (debunk) spouses only under serious circumstances, with the permission of the diocese. Therefore, the union of one’s life before God and the sacrament of wedding itself should be approached seriously, with understanding and taking into account all traditions and rules.

Marriages are made in heaven, and this happens through a wedding, a beautiful ceremony with a centuries-old history. Although the phrase “wedding ceremony” may not be entirely correct, because wedding is one of the seven Sacraments of the Orthodox Church, which means the union of two people forever according to the decision of the heart and soul.

Often people get married paying tribute to fashion, and not understanding the very essence of this action. After all, people can get married if they have made a mutual decision to stay together under any circumstances, as long as their hearts beat.

Wedding refers to sacred ceremonies that give a person grace from the Lord and the Holy Spirit.

Wedding in the Orthodox Church - rules

The ceremony is carried out according to certain rules:

1. The wedding is carried out in the presence of a marriage certificate.
2. The husband becomes the head of the family, he is obliged to honor his wife, protect and cherish.
3. It becomes the husband's responsibility to maintain contact with the church.
4. A wife must listen to her husband and recognize his leadership.

A completed wedding is not subject to cancellation or revision, but with special permission, dethronement or divorce is carried out for the following reasons:

• spouse's adultery
• mental illness of the spouse (if at the time of the wedding the person is already ill, this is grounds for refusing to marry the couple).

If the former spouse is alive and well, a second wedding is possible with the permission of the bishop. A petition is written indicating the reasons for the divorce, documents are attached (any church will tell you more, and they will also give you a list of necessary documents).

You should know that the bishop’s permission is given to persons from dissolved unions only out of tolerance for the weakness of today’s Christians:

• the wedding is carried out in the absence of obstacles (previously, an engagement was held, the couple’s intention to tie the knot was announced publicly - so that anyone who knows about the circumstances preventing this could report it);
• a person can get married three times, a third ceremony is allowed extremely rarely;
• the young and witnesses must be baptized and wear a cross during the ceremony.

Church marriages between Christians are allowed, one of whom is not Orthodox, and the baptism of children into Orthodoxy is mandatory:

1. If the person getting married does not know whether he has been baptized, he must tell the priest about it.
2. The couple informs the priest of the temple about their intention to get married.
3. To receive a positive decision from the church to perform the ceremony, the couple must agree to give birth to children and raise them in Orthodoxy.
4. There are age restrictions: men from 18 years old, women from 16 years old.
5. You cannot obtain a wedding permit if:

• not baptized;
• the bride and groom are relatives, even if the relationship is distant;
• one of the spouses has a previous marriage or an established civil relationship that is reliably known.

It is difficult to obtain permission for the wedding of a godfather and a godson.

Pregnancy of a young woman or lack of consent and blessing of parents are not an obstacle to the ceremony.

Wedding time

Weddings are held at any time of the year, but the date is specified during a preliminary conversation with the priest. Autumn and winter are considered the most favorable (after the Intercession and after Epiphany). In the spring they marry on Krasnaya Gorka, in the summer - during the periods between fasts.

Often young people get married after registration, but even then it’s not too late. According to the canons of Orthodoxy, unmarried couples are in fornication, so believing spouses should not delay this - it is wonderful when children are born in a marriage sanctified by the church. The decision to get married should be thoughtful and balanced - both spouses should not doubt the love and devotion of their partner.

When can't you get married?

The ceremony is not held during fasting and on the eve of all major events. Orthodox holidays. The monthly cycle of the spouse should be taken into account - after all, according to the rules, a woman is not allowed to enter the temple during her period.

What is needed for a wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church

To carry out Orthodox sacrament you need to prepare, it is not enough just to make a decision, but also to know the details of preparation for a significant event.

The sequence of actions is approximately this:

• choose a temple;
• decide on a priest;
• the spiritual father of the spouses, even a priest from another parish, can marry a couple;
• talk with the priest and listen to his advice - for this, a preliminary conversation is held with the newlyweds, during which it is explained how the wedding takes place in the church and what is needed for this.

If the priest does not ask the newlyweds to postpone the wedding, there are no obstacles to setting a date and time for the ceremony. During the conversation, it is clarified whether the newlyweds agree to get married at the same time as other couples - so that there is no turmoil that will spoil the impression of the event.

The wedding is very beautiful, so many people want to do video filming and photography. You should coordinate this with the priest and ask him to instruct the operator on the correct behavior.

Young people are ordered to fast, which means refusing the following actions:

• eating meat;
• smoking;
• drinking alcohol;
• intimacy.

It is better to check with the priest during the conversation about the duration of the fast; it is several days.

1. Before a significant date, you need to go to a service.
2. Confession and communion of the holy gifts are obligatory.
3. Consecrated images of the Savior and the Mother of God are purchased in advance.
4. You need candles, a white towel or a table on which the young people will stand. Attributes are purchased by witnesses.
5. Rings are purchased and given to the priest before the ceremony. According to the canonical rules, a man’s ring is gold, a woman’s is silver, but now this is not given any importance.
6. Before the wedding, parents bless the newlyweds, baptizing them with images and presenting them for a kiss. The man is the image of Christ the Savior, the woman is the Mother of God.

How long does a church wedding last?

The ceremony lasts long enough, the newlywed should think about low-heeled shoes.

Cost of a wedding in an Orthodox Church

You have to pay for the wedding. Of course, this is a Sacrament that is not measured in money, but payment is made not for the grace of God, but for the work of the people performing the ceremony.

When communicating with a clergyman, you should clarify this side of the issue. If the amount is too large for the young people, they should say so. Sometimes, instead of payment, the priest invites the couple to make a donation to the church in whatever amount they can.

The cost of a wedding in the capitals starts from 10,000 rubles, this is due to the beauty and celebrity of the temples. The concept of prayer of a place is also important. In other cities and towns, weddings are much cheaper; on weekdays the cost is usually lower.

Church wedding for already married couples a few years after the wedding

It will not be easy for the bride and groom to endure two ceremonies on one day, so these two events are often separated in time. Sometimes the wedding is postponed for several years, and a lot of time passes before the couple decides to legalize their relationship in the church. They get married 10 and 20 years after registration, but if many years have passed, then instead of a wedding, a church blessing ceremony is offered.

Weddings were originally intended for young married couples. The church will bless the long-term union of two people in a different way. Father will explain how a wedding takes place for people who have been together for many years.

The blessing has the same meaning and meaning, but the ceremony looks different:

• crowns and a cup of wine are not needed for people who have lived for eternity together, these symbols mean mutual patience, joint overcoming of difficulties and hardships;
• prayers for childbearing are not suitable for spouses whose children have already grown up;
• Prayers are read that are appropriate in meaning.

Wedding without witnesses

Usually the wedding is held with witnesses who are selected from people close to the spouses. They must be baptized and legally married. Divorced husbands and wives and people in civil marriages cannot participate in the ceremony. It is allowed to get married without witnesses if no suitable persons are found. The parents of those getting married can act as witnesses (if they are legally married, and if they are married, then this is even better).

Wedding without registration at the registry office

The ceremony is not held without registering the marriage at the registry office and presenting the relevant document. This eliminates the possibility of bigamy, since the religious organization does not conduct background checks on parishioners.

Wedding in Orthodox Church- this is one of the seven main sacraments and believers try to observe the rules for it as carefully as possible. Wedding, along with baptism, confirmation, repentance, communion, priesthood and consecration of oil, constitute the center of spiritual life and embody the fullness of a person’s entry into church life. You will read everything that the bride and groom need to know before such an important step as a wedding in our detailed article. It will also be of interest to those who have already performed the sacrament, but want to learn more about it.

The meaning of a wedding in the Orthodox Church

According to the Christian worldview, two people are united in a union sanctified by God and become one flesh. That is why divorces, which are so common today in Christian circles, are considered an unnatural phenomenon, as if a mother decided not to live with the child she gave birth to. Sometimes such a rupture is associated with amputation of a limb or organ - a painful process that makes a person disabled.

The Lord created Adam and Eve and blessed them to multiply and fruit the earth. Adam immediately recognized the spiritual and physical relationship with his wife: the first thing he did when he saw Eve was call her his flesh and blood, because he fell in love with her:

“And the man said, Behold, this is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she will be called woman, for she was taken from [her] husband” (Gen. 2:23).

Therefore, before taking this step, people must realize the seriousness that they promise to God by this act.

Young love, as well as long-awaited love, is characterized by haste and seeing one’s partner in “rosy” colors. The virtues that any person has - since everyone is created in the image of God and inherited perfect traits from Him - a loving person perceives exaggeratedly and it seems to him that the object of love is perfect. At the same time, his shortcomings - which everyone also has, since we were all subjected to original sin and its consequences in the form of illness, death and passions - seem to be smoothed out and do not lend themselves to rational analysis.

Therefore, in a church where young people have come to talk with the priest about the upcoming event, you can encounter an unexpected reaction from the church minister. So, if the priest observes the charter of the holy fathers and honors traditions, then he will advise lovers to wait at least a year before the wedding, during which time they can get to know the person better in different circumstances and experience their feelings in practice.

At the same time, this year is not blessed to live intimate life. In the case when the newlyweds came after an established relationship and confronted the priest with a fait accompli, he explained to them that early sexual intimacy before legal marriage leads to unfavorable consequences for future relationships and their strength.

After an explanatory conversation, if the young people have realized their guilt, the priest invites them to fast for three days, then confess their sins and receive communion. On the eve of the wedding, the newlyweds must take communion in order to feel this day as the most important in life - the day when two destinies become one destiny, two souls become one soul and two bodies become one body.

How to prepare for a wedding?

First you need to choose the day and place for the wedding and notify the priest in advance. It must be remembered that not every day of the year the Orthodox Church is allowed to perform this sacrament.

The sacrament of weddings is not performed on Tuesdays and Thursdays, since these days precede fasting, which believers observe on Wednesday and Friday. Also, the sacrament is not performed on Saturday, since Sunday (and the church day begins at 20:00 the day before) is Little Easter, a sanctified day.

It is also forbidden to get married on designated dates. Ecumenical Councils posts – these are 4 posts a year with a total duration of 5-6 months with different frequencies.

As a rule, the Orthodox Church of Russia has established a centuries-old tradition of getting married on Red Hill - this is the name of the holiday on the first Sunday after Easter. This day is called church calendar Anti-Easter marks the beginning of the period of national wedding festivities, which occurred en masse in Rus' at all times.

The sacrament is also not performed on the eve of single fast days - for example, September 11 on the feast of the Beheading of John the Baptist; V special days joy and celebration after Lent and Advent - on Christmastide and Bright Week; before and during the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross.

After choosing the day, it is necessary to begin preparation, which, first of all, does not include the external preparation of individual items, inviting guests and the plan of events for the celebration - but the internal state of the newlyweds, which consists of preparing for the sacrament of Confession and. Both sacraments necessarily precede such important event. After all, the Lord calls the Kingdom of Heaven a wedding feast, and Communion at such a feast on the wedding day is a communion of God’s love and strengthening for the entire future journey together in life.

The priest sets the time for the wedding immediately after the liturgy, which is held every morning. Ideally, if the newlyweds manage to defend the liturgy and receive communion at it immediately on the eve of the celebration. After all, it is much more important to spend your energy on contributing to the sacrament than to save it for evening festivities (which it is advisable to avoid and leave guests as early as possible for privacy).

What do you need for a wedding in a church?

The rules for preparing for a wedding in the Orthodox Church lie mainly in internal awareness and responsibility for this step. In the understanding that there is no turning back and all difficulties of character, adjustments, disagreements cannot now be a reason for dissolving the union that God has sanctified.

This is a serious step, but many today take it frivolously, without calculating the strength and strength of their feelings. Unfortunately, such people do not understand that after the breakup of a married union, it will be more difficult to make the next family harmonious and they should take care of what they have.

And secondly, it is necessary to prepare an outfit, documents, items for the sacrament and other things needed on this day.

What is needed for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, list:

1. Marriage registration certificate. According to the rules established by the Holy Synod, marriages that are not registered with the registry office cannot be married. Such conditions are dictated primarily by the seriousness of the newlyweds’ intentions, because after the revolution and collapse Russian Empire The church has lost the power to influence the rights and obligations of the parties; the function of regulating legal relations is now performed by the registry office.
2. Icons of the Savior and Mother of God. What icons are needed for a wedding? Any images and settings will do, but the main thing is that you can pick them up without any problems. This pious tradition used to mean the blessing of parents for marriage and was passed on by inheritance - on the bride’s side an icon Holy Mother of God, and on the groom’s side there is an icon of the Savior. The blessing of parents had sacred value and was sacredly observed.
3. Gold wedding rings. Previously, a woman's wedding ring was silver, recalling that in a Christian family a woman is a helper to her husband and is submissive loving husband. My husband had Golden ring, which corresponded to the symbolism of the royal metal - like Christ, the husband is obliged to love his wife, who symbolizes the Church. It is the husband who will be responsible for his family before God at the Judgment.
4. Wedding candles. They can be purchased on site at the temple. They are a symbol of the grace of the Holy Spirit, who is invisibly present and sanctifies.
5. White board. It can be like a regular store-bought towel white, and hand-embroidered fabric by the bride (which was often practiced in the past). Can also be purchased locally at the Temple. It is laid on the floor and raised up at a certain point in the process of the sacrament. The plat symbolizes the purity of thoughts and aspirations of those getting married.
6. Some churches have a fixed donation amount for the sacrament. The cost must be paid before the sacrament so as not to forget about it after. If there is no fixed fee, then you can leave a voluntary donation after the wedding. It should be remembered that the state does not provide church workers with salaries and their living depends on our donations.
7. Worthy appearance those getting married. The girl (woman) should have a headdress (scarf or a fuller veil for a wedding), covered shoulders, the outfit should be modest, covering the knees and not have a deep neckline. A man must wear trousers. Shorts, breeches and other shortened options that expose legs are not allowed for men in the temple. It is better to choose light, pastel colors for the bride's dress. Traditionally, a pure, chaste girl emphasizes her innocence with an absolutely white dress and fresh flowers in her hands. It is better to choose comfortable shoes for the bride, with flat soles, so that you can perform the service without any problems.

After the church lost its legitimate civil power to regulate legal issues, the presence of witnesses is not mandatory and is rather of the nature of a pious tradition. The witnesses were guarantors of the spouses and knew them well. They invited witnesses who were wise in experience and had their own families, difficult situations could give good advice.

What wedding rules in the Orthodox Church do you need to know?

The priest chosen by the newlyweds to conduct their sacrament will clearly explain how to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church. But general rules remain the same.

A marriage registered by the registry office is a graceless, but not lawless cohabitation. This form is respected by the church and is permitted in cases where a church marriage cannot be performed. But it cannot be accomplished in several cases:

• When civil marriage was registered more than three times - according to church canons you cannot marry more than three times;
• when one or both spouses do not belong to the Orthodox Church, are not baptized, or are not brought in voluntarily;
• when there was no actual dissolution of marriage with the previous spouse: for civil registration, a divorce certificate is required, for church registration - the blessing of the bishop for entering into a new marriage;
• when the bride and groom are related by blood or spirituality - including if they are godparents of the same person;
• The rules for the age of those getting married in the Orthodox Church are limited to the upper threshold of 60 years for a woman and 70 for a man, the lower threshold: 16 years for a girl and 18 for a guy.

When preparing for the wedding, everything should be discussed controversial issues in matters of worldview, so that the sacrament is performed with a pure heart.

How long does a wedding take in a church? 40-60 minutes.

What to do with wedding candles and other attributes after the wedding?

From such family heirlooms you can arrange a small collection. For this purpose, a separate box is created, where attributes are placed after weddings, baptisms and other memorable family events. The box can be shown to children, illuminating for them the details of a significant day, refreshing your own memory and plunging into memories in happy events. You can also place various souvenirs brought from the pilgrimage there.

Wedding candles can be lit during prayer to ask God for something important for the family, for special gratitude to Him, or at other times.

All of these things are reminders of important milestones in the family's development and are part of the emotional life of family members. However, in themselves they do not carry sacred value. If for some reason the relics are no longer needed, they can be eliminated in a special way. Since the items took part in the holy rite, it is better to burn them - yourself or hand them over to the church with a request to dispose of them blessed candles and objects participating in the sacrament.

Seeing the symbols of the wedding in front of them, spouses can, through memories, find ways of mutual understanding, when difficult moments arise, through tangible evidence of their union, which they entered into before God, the spouses remember the importance of the family hearth and draw new strength to go through life together hand in hand. hand.

The rules of weddings in the Orthodox Church consist, first of all, of a moral basis, which consists of purity of intentions, the absence of selfish and dishonest goals and a firm determination to unite with a loved one. The purpose of such a union is to receive from the Lord the gift of like-mindedness for Christian life and raising children. You can learn more about weddings from the book.

The church service during which a Christian marriage is illuminated and blessed is called a wedding or church marriage ceremony. Its essence is to bless future spouses for a happy family life, giving birth and raising children. This sacrament should not be a fashion statement or a mandatory element of the wedding. Such a decision is made consciously; each spouse must be aware that they are ready to be with this person for the rest of their lives.

Why do you need a church wedding?

Initially, among the Slavs, the wedding ceremony was endowed with a magical meaning - to protect newly-made spouses from the evil eye, damage, evil spirits. They prepared for it in advance: they sewed special clothes, hats, and prepared protective dishes. With the emergence of Christianity in Rus', the church custom continued to exist. It was believed that a wedding in a church brings happiness, prosperity to a married couple, and protects them from troubles.

The meaning of a wedding is not only an agreement to take care of each other, but also a decision to raise children together, according to Christian traditions. Wedding is a sacrament after which marriage is not subject to divorce. Currently, young people decide to consecrate their marriage in church for a number of reasons:

• a married couple receives a blessing from God;
• internal forces appear to create strong family;
• protecting the marriage from troubles and troubles;
• the emergence of a strong connection on a spiritual level;
• responsibility for offspring;
• receiving protection from God in joy and sorrow.

What do you need for a wedding?

Before performing the sacrament, you need to talk with the priest and prepare a wedding pair of icons, candles, and a towel. Wedding rings are required. Peculiarities:

• According to Orthodox canons, the bride wears a silver jewelry, and the groom wears a gold one. This is explained by the fact that a woman personifies the image of the Church, and therefore should, like silver, radiate light and grace. The man is considered the image of Christ, whose Divine Glory is symbolized by gold.
• In the future, things used in the ritual will help. So, candles can be lit during family problems, and the icons will give strength, protecting the spouses.

What kind of icons should there be?

Icons necessary for pious tradition are called wedding couples. According to traditions, newlyweds must receive a blessing from their parents, while the bride is blessed with an icon of the Most Holy Theotokos, and the groom with an icon of the Lord Pantocrator. Currently, the use of any handwritten image of the Blessed Virgin Mary and Christ is allowed. The wedding icon of the Kazan Mother of God is often used for these purposes.

Conditions for a wedding in the Orthodox Church

Not every official marriage can be blessed and illuminated. There are a number of contraindications and restrictions for getting married in a church, including the age of the newlyweds. So, the future wife must be over 16 years old, and future husband- 18 years. According to church canons, there are days of the week and holidays on which sacred rites cannot be performed.

When can I get married?

Many spouses plan to get married on the day of marriage registration at the registry office. This is a serious intention that should not be rushed. It is better to postpone this decision until the birth of the child or after several years of marriage. When choosing the date for the sacrament, it is important to remember that it is not always possible to perform church ceremony weddings Unacceptable days for this: Tuesday, Thursday: they precede fast days. You cannot get married on Saturday - the day before the day off.

On patronal and twelfth holidays, and multi-day fasts, weddings are prohibited. This:

• Christmas post: 28.11-06.01;
• Cheese week;
• Petrov's fast, depending on the date of Easter, lasts 8-42 days;
• Assumption Fast: 14.08-27.08;
• Beheading of John the Baptist (September 11);
• Exaltation of the Holy Cross (September 27);
• Christmas time (07.01-19.01);
• Maslenitsa;
• Bright week after Easter.

Even if you have decided on a date that is not included in the fast, it is worth going to the temple and additionally checking with the priest so that there are no misunderstandings. Other restrictions on holding a church wedding ceremony include: night time, “critical” days for women and permanent holidays such as Christmas, Epiphany, Annunciation, Easter.

Obstacles to marriage

A prerequisite for a wedding is the conclusion of an official marriage. Those getting married must be baptized Orthodox Christians. Although there is an exception to this rule: a non-Orthodox Christian is allowed to get married, provided that the children born will be baptized into Orthodoxy. Other restrictions when the ordinance is not performed include:

• unbaptized;
• atheists;
• living in a civil marriage;
• people with blood or spiritual kinship;
• fourth official marriage;
• mental disorders and diseases.

Rules

Conduct in church should be reverent and respectful towards the sacred things and each other. Loud conversations, laughter, and whispering are not allowed here. About Cell phones You also need to forget: turn off the device or put it in silent mode. While in the center of the church, you must not turn your back on the holy images. All attention should be directed to prayer, because subsequent family life depends on it.

Preparation

To choose a church for a wedding, you need to walk through different churches and feel “your” place. It is also important to find a priest you like, talk to him, discuss all the details. Then you need to make an appointment for the wedding a few weeks in advance. The issue of cost needs to be discussed in advance: in some churches it is a fixed amount, in others it is a voluntary donation.

The bride and groom should prepare for the wedding not only financially, but also spiritually: confess and receive communion. Without these procedures, the couple will not be able to receive blessings from God in the church. Newlyweds must pray, ask for salvation, forgiveness from the offended, let go of grievances, and pay off debts. Only after their souls are cleansed are spouses allowed to receive communion.

Prayers

Treat your prayers with attention and reverence, because a wedding is not just a ceremony. During the entire sacrament, the Church prays only for the bride and groom, with the exception of prayer for the raising parents. Church ministers, those getting married, witnesses, guests and everyone present should, with their words, thoughts, and prayers, ask God for happiness and a strong family for the spouses. It's important to focus on what's important.

Choosing an outfit for the bride

The wedding dress should cover the shoulders and arms and be no higher than the knees. A deep neckline is not desirable, but you can use a cape, an openwork shawl, a bolero, or a stole. It is better to choose a light color for the outfit; avoid dark and bright ones. Sundresses and trouser suits are not appropriate for this occasion. The bride's head must be covered. A hat is not suitable for this occasion, since during the ceremony the newlyweds wear church crowns.

Shoes can be anything, the main thing is that they are comfortable. You must remain on your feet throughout the entire procedure. The wedding lasts a long time, so it is better to avoid high heels and uncomfortable shoes. Makeup should be light and discreet. It is forbidden to kiss icons, crosses, or crowns with painted lips. The wedding dress is stored with wedding candles, icons, and baptismal shirts. It cannot be sold, given away or given to anyone.

How does the wedding take place?

During Divine Liturgy emphasize the importance of the Sacrament of Marriage and the spiritual purity with which one must approach its conclusion. This is followed by betrothal - the consolidation of the mutual promises of the spouses before the Lord. Heavenly marriage takes place in the church and means that the husband accepts his wife from God himself. The engagement is secured with wedding rings, which the priest puts on first to the groom, then to the bride, while saying prayers. Afterwards, the spouses exchange rings three times in honor of the Holy Trinity. Everything ends with a prayer for a Guardian Angel for the new family.

Then comes the wedding:

• The newlyweds hold candles in their hands and solemnly follow the priest with a censer to the altar. This means that on its own life path they must follow and keep the commandments of the Lord.
• The couple is greeted by the Choir singing Psalm 127, which blesses the marriage.
• The newlyweds stand on a white or pink board located in front of the lectern.
• The bride and groom once again confirm their voluntary decision to marry, remain faithful and create a union made in heaven.
• The wedding ceremony begins with the liturgical exclamation: “Blessed is the Kingdom...”
• Then prayers are read, after which the most important moments of the sacrament begin - everything that was asked for in the prayers is accomplished, strengthening and illuminating the future family.
• The priest places a crown on the groom and gives him to venerate the image of the Savior. In the same way, he blesses the bride, allowing her to kiss the icon of the Most Holy Theotokos.
• The priest reads a prayer for the acceptance of crowns immaculate and undefiled in the Kingdom of God.
• Following is the letter of the Apostle Paul to the Ephesians, which husbands and wives should fully know.

Spouses, adorned with crowns, appear before the face of God Himself, awaiting blessing. The solemn moment comes. After reading the prayers, the priest gives wine to drink first to the groom and then to the bride. Everyone takes 3 sips. The priest then connects the husband's right hand with right hand wife, covers them with stole, and places his hand on top. Such a gesture means that through the hand of a clergyman, the husband receives a wife from the Church itself forever in the earthly world.

The young couple walks around the lectern 3 times, from that moment their joint procession began, hand in hand. Having completed the movements, the priest removes the crowns from the married couple, brings them a cross for kissing and hands the image of the Savior to the groom, and the image of the Most Holy Theotokos to the bride. The great sacrament of wedding lasts 45–60 minutes. A church wedding ends with a wedding meal for spouses, guests, and witnesses.

How many times can you get married in Orthodoxy?

A wedding is a responsible decision for two adults. loving people. This is the step that seals marriage ties and makes them inseparable. If there is a feeling of fear or uncertainty, it is better to wait. Having decided on the sacrament, you should not perceive it as a beautiful church ceremony, and even more so as an obligatory element of the wedding. It's something more. Jesus said in the Bible that people cannot destroy a union blessed by God, but there are situations when a church marriage does break up.

There is no such thing as “debunking,” but the church still recognizes the possibility of dissolving a married union. According to church canons, a Christian is not allowed, but tolerated, a second marriage. Permission for it can be obtained only by writing a petition addressed to the ruling bishop and submitting Required documents. This is followed by a conversation with a priest to explain the reasons for the dissolution of the first marriage. The Church allows remarriage:

• widowers;
• those who are left with small children;
• if one spouse was never married, and the second was divorced not on his own initiative;
• after adultery;
• in case of criminal punishment of one of the spouses;
• in the presence of a disease that is incompatible with the birth of children (AIDS, syphilis);
• in the absence of a spouse for more than 3 years;
• in case of severe mental illness incompatible with family life(including drug addiction, alcoholism).

According to church rules, a repeated sacrament leads to excommunication from communion for 1-2 years, and for a third wedding – up to 5 years. The temple interprets the second and third marriage as adultery and polygamy. The ceremony will no longer take place the same way as during the first wedding. Prayers will be not only for the happiness of married life, but also demanding repentance of those who have retreated from church rules marriage. It is permissible to marry for the third time only due to the exclusion of disorder in personal life and fornication. This is not the norm for a believer. The fourth marriage is not considered by the church in any way: it is prohibited.

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