1) Introduction…………………………………………………………….3

2) Chapter 1. Philosophical view………………………………………………………..4

Point 1. “Hard” truth…………………………………………..4

Point 2. Pleasant delusion……………………………………..7

Point 3. Separation of lies......................................................9

Point 4. Harm of the truth……………………………………………...10

Point 5. Golden mean…………………………………………...11

3) Chapter 2. Modern view……………………………………..13

Point 6. Is it worth lying?.................................................... ..........................13

Point 7. Survey………………………………………………………..14

Point 8. Modern opinions……………………………………15

4) Conclusion………………………………………………………17

5) List of references……………………………………..18

Introduction.

I think that every person at least once in his life faced a choice: to reveal the true state of affairs or to embellish the situation, if appropriate. This is a difficult choice, many even suffer because they have to choose. There are people who are born liars; there are those who hate lies and prefer the truth; and there are people for whom there are certain situations where lying is considered appropriate and necessary.

So what is better: a pleasant delusion or a “bitter” truth, sometimes even of a sad nature? I want to look at this issue as accurately as possible and go as deep as possible into the essence of the problem, find out what people prefer more in our time and whether their preferences coincide with their actions, and also draw certain conclusions for myself.

Chapter 1. Philosophical view.

“Children and fools always tell the truth,” says
ancient wisdom. The conclusion is clear: adults and
wise people They never tell the truth."
Mark Twain

Quite a lot of events happen in our lives: joy, sadness, luck, love, etc. All good events always alternate with less joyful events. They cannot even be called bad, and rather they are not even events, but certain obstacles that a person has to face. If you think about it, you can notice one very important detail– no matter what, people always demand the “bitter” truth, reliable information, and not “sweet” lies. We often believe in a fairy tale, we live behind these rose-colored glasses, but the reality is much more deceitful and mean. Hiding behind dreams, we do not notice a simple needle in this wonderful world, which, oddly enough, can “prick” us painfully.

Point 1. “Hard” truth.

The most common misconception concerns human feelings and relationships. I remember the work “Woe from Wit” by A.S. Griboedova and one of the main characters of Sophia, who, having fallen in love with Molchanin, accepts his romantic impulse as a gift of fate that will help her become happy . However, all her hopes and dreams collapse at one moment, when after seeing the scene of the declaration of love between Molchanin and the maid, she realizes how wrong her opinion about her loved one was before.

Disappointment is the eternal companion of delusion. And the later the true picture is revealed, the more difficult it is to accept and survive, and most importantly, change something in your life for the better. For example, in Germany, doctors tell patients the whole truth when telling cancer patients about the severity of their condition, and it seems to me that this only at instill in them the desire to resist and fight for their lives. Of course, miracles happen rarely, and maybe they don’t happen at all, but you can’t take away a person’s hope.

German scientists tried to figure this out; they interviewed a number of people and asked them just one question: what would they like “a bitter truth or a sweet lie.” This is what we found out during this survey: “ After examining the patient, the doctor discovered malignant tumor. And what to do next? Lie to a patient, calling stomach cancer an ulcer, lung cancer bronchitis, and thyroid cancer an endemic goiter, or tell him about a terrible diagnosis? It turns out that most patients prefer the second option. A sociological survey conducted among patients in oncology departments of various UK hospitals showed that 90 percent of them need truthful information. Moreover, 62% of patients would like not only to know the diagnosis, but also to hear from the doctor a description of the disease and a probable prognosis for its course, and 70% decided to inform their families about the disease. An important role in determining preferences is played by the patient’s age - for example, among patients over 80 years of age, 13% prefer to remain in the dark, and among their younger “brothers” in misfortune - 6%.” All this suggests that most people prefer the truth, no matter how bitter it is, and no matter what problems it brings in the future.

In love, for example, we often overestimate our chosen one, the sincerity of his intentions: perhaps his words are at odds with his actions. " 40% of women underestimate their age when meeting men" - series "Theory of Lies". " First of all, they lie to those they love." - Nadine de Rothschild. From this we can conclude that when we are mistaken in some issue that is significant to us, we descend into the world of illusions, creating a fairy tale that appeals not only to us, but also to many other people.

On the one hand, a “sweet” lie, or as it is also called a “white lie,” is quite appropriate. But do you want to lie to your loved ones? After all, this lie can lead not to a positive outcome, but to pain and disappointment.

I don't like it when people lie to my face
Trying to save me from pain!
I don't like being told the wrong thing;
Why did they want to say that at first!
I hate pity eyes
Which pierce my soul!
I hate, I hate
When they say one thing, but I hear another!
I don't accept sweet talk
Which are so flattering and false!
I hate a world where you are nobody's
Where everyone is afraid of the truth, everyone is cowardly!
I don't want deception and lies
I don't want pity or flattery!
I hope I deserve the truth
And I dream of only truth.
Let it be bitter, like a straight arrow,
Not the one that is so nice to hear,
Let it hurt me sometimes
Let the heart hear only the truth! 1

It seems to me that this poem shows us very well that a person not only does not want to hear a lie, he also hates it. In his work, the author speaks of truth as something sacred that must be earned.

« When in doubt, tell the truth" - Mark Twain. This

1 http://www.proza.ru/avtor/196048

the quote is true, because having lied, it is you who has to unravel all the threads that you have twisted. A pleasant delusion may help only at first, but then it will be much worse.

And as they say in the feature film “Brother-2”: “- Tell me, American, what is strength? My brother says that power is in money. You cheated on someone, you became richer, so what? I believe strength is in the TRUTH, whoever is right is stronger ».

Point 2. Pleasant delusion.

In contrast, I want to quote, unfortunately, I don’t remember the correct presentation, so I’ll change it in my own way: “ If you want to harm a person, then it is not necessary to slander and gossip, it is enough to tell the truth about him" People really always want the truth and try to find it. Although they themselves do nothing but hide, conceal, keep silent. How often do you tell the truth to your superiors? Do you often tell the truth about what you really think about your friends and acquaintances? Have you ever told the whole truth about yourself? Without hiding anything, to your parents, for example? Or the same friends?

I think the answer will be negative, the truth is too “bitter”. " The unpleasant truth, inevitable death and mustaches on women are three things we don’t want to notice.” series "The Theory of Lies". We lie at work to colleagues, I tell them about happy life our family. We lie to our family by not telling them about problems at work. We also lie to our friends so that they don’t think that in some situation we feel weak and helpless. The worst thing about all this is that any lie, even a small one, is subsequently revealed.

And how can your family, friends, and colleagues trust you after this? If you constantly leave things unsaid. " We like people who boldly tell us what they think, as long as they think the same as we do." - Mark Twain. 2 All this leads to the loss of loved ones and friends, because now they

2 http://www.wtr.ru/aphorism/new42.htm

They think that you don’t trust them because you’ve always hidden something.

And the worst thing is that your harmless lie can turn into a “big one” that borders on betrayal. So, maybe you should train yourself to tell the truth?

As an example, I would like to give an old parable about truth:

Man, by all means,
I set out to find the truth.
I put a lot of effort into this,
It was not easy for him on the way:
Walked the road less traveled
And in the cold, and in the rain, and in the summer heat,
I wounded my feet with stones,
He lost weight and became as gray as a harrier.
But he achieved his cherished goal -
After long wanderings and losses
He's in the hut of Truth indeed

He opened the unlocked door.

An ancient old woman was sitting there.
It was clear that no guests were expected.
The man asked, gathering his courage:
- Isn’t your name Pravda?
“It’s me,” the hostess answered.
And the Seeker then exclaimed:
- Humanity has always believed
That you are beautiful and young.
If I reveal the Truth to people,
Will they become happier?
Smiling at our hero
Truth whispered: “Lie.”

Point 3. Separation of lies.

« The average person lies three times in a ten minute conversation." This is a quote from the series “The Theory of Lies.” Man is designed in such a way that he cannot help but lie; lying is a part of our life. Even when we are asked “How are you?”, we answer “everything is fine” or “fine”, despite what state we really have, simply justifying this by the fact that we do not want to share problems with those around us, it is not enough acquaintances, people. Agree, although this is a small lie, it is still a lie. Answering this way almost every day, we get used to lying and in order to somehow justify it, we begin to divide lies: into positive and negative.

/ / / What's better " sweet lie"or the "bitter" truth? (based on Gorky’s play “At the Lower Depths”)

What is better “sweet lies” or “bitter truth”? I think everyone will have their own answer to this question. In the play "" Maxim Gorky raises before us the same problem of "sweet lies" and "bitter truth", but does not directly answer the question posed.

It seems to me that for the heroes of the play “At the Bottom” the “sweet lie” turned out to be better than the “bitter truth”, because it gave them hope for a better life.

All of them: Satin, Kleshch, Actor, Bubnov, Nastya themselves wanted to be at the bottom of their lives, they themselves chose their family. Gorky shows them as people deprived of dreams and goals in life. They are simply wasting their lives in a stuffy shelter.

But everything changes with the arrival of old man Luke. He became a kind of catalyst, pushing everyone to action. By showing compassion and comforting them, Luke gave many people hope for a better life. It becomes amazing how very a short time, thanks to warm words, gained a huge influence on the characters in the play. For example, he was able to calm the dying Anna by telling her about better life V the afterlife. The girl dies with a certain hope, with the belief that in the next world she will have a comfortable life, devoid of suffering and deprivation.

The former employee of the Actor Theater did not go unnoticed by Luke. The old man showed him that not everything is lost, that everything can be returned. He also gave him hope for new life. Unfortunately, this was not destined to happen. Hope can be lost as quickly as you gained it.

It seems to me that the Actor committed suicide not through Luke’s fault. This happened due to weakness of spirit and lack of self-confidence. Luke wanted with his compassion to at least somehow brighten up the difficult fate of the heroes of the work. He did not show them the real order of things again, thereby pushing them even further; he would not have changed anything by doing so. Thanks to his “sweet lies,” he wanted to show them that there is a way up, you just have to believe in yourself.

In the play, Gorky shows us his negative attitude towards lies; he does not advise living in dreams and illusions. But, despite this, the words of old man Luke had such an impact because they were “sown” in the soil of the illusions of the main characters.

“When you tell a person a lie, you lose trust. By telling the truth, you lose a person.”

From a scientific point of view, lying is one of the natural ways psychological defenses characteristic of humans. A person, as a rule, consciously makes a decision, the result of which is a lie. From a moral point of view, a lie is “bad”, the truth is “good”. And, despite all the social censures, we use lies every day in everyday life.

In Islam, for example, lying is only permissible in three cases:
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Lying is permissible only in three cases: between husband and wife, to achieve each other’s satisfaction; during the war; and lies, in order to reconcile people.”

Why is it sometimes so much easier for us to lie than to tell the truth?
It seems to me that we are trying to protect ourselves from unpleasant situations. I think lying to preserve relationships with dear people is justified.

BUT, everything secret sooner or later becomes clear. And even the most bad news can be presented in completely different ways. You can talk about this with panic and pessimism, or you can assure loved one that there is a way out of the situation, and you will look for it together, etc.

I know cases when people lie simply for any reason. It's probably a disease. Even in seemingly completely simple questions - Where are you now? (I know that the person is sitting at his computer), but for some reason he answers, “I’m somewhere else, at a business meeting... I’ll be home in a few days... I really don’t understand this kind of lie.”

I know, on personal experience that the truth can “kill” a relationship. Not everyone can bear the bitter truth. It's better to live in a sweet lie. But for me personally, this very truth helps me grow and change in better side. Sometimes an outside opinion “opens” your eyes.

And how to stop lying? Psychologists advise:

1. Try not to lie for one day, one week, one month. If you are surprised to find that this is quite difficult, then we can say that you have formed a habit of lying.
2. To do this you must make a firm decision. Ask yourself whether your attitude towards yourself will change when you get rid of this habit.
3. Observe yourself. When do you start lying? And you will see some patterns: you lie only in the presence of people of the opposite sex; you lie only at work, only at home; only for the mother, and maybe for the child. You lie only when intoxicated, only in unfamiliar company. You lie to yourself when you say: “I’ll eat the last bite, and tomorrow I’ll go on a diet.” The more information, the better.
4. Analyze how you benefited when you lied. Maybe you wanted to remain nice and hospitable in the eyes of others when, citing being busy, you refused to meet your friends? Did you want to look more respectable in the eyes of new acquaintances? Or maybe you don’t know how to say “no”? Or did they simply receive momentary pleasure from their own importance or from admiring glances?

In face-to-face communication between two adults, the share of unreliable information is 25% of everything said. When we talk on the phone, the figure rises to 40%. But if the dialogue is carried out through correspondence via e-mail, the percentage of untruths drops to 14. Psychologists explain this by unconscious responsibility for what we sign up for, faith in the printed word...

It must be hard to live in a world where everyone will only tell the truth. Is this how people want lies to disappear?

How often do you use lies to achieve your goals? And what is best for you?
Just let's be honest :)))

What a parable

White lie

One merchant came to his friend the soothsayer to find out how successful the deal he had planned for the next day would be. “Invest in the business,” said the soothsayer, “only a tenth of the money that you were going to invest.” The income will be the same.

The merchant listened, invested a tenth of his money in the business, and in the end lost all this money.

The angry merchant ran into the soothsayer's house, intending to bring down the entire burden of indignation and resentment on him.

The soothsayer was already waiting for the merchant at the entrance and, without allowing him to say a word, addressed him with the following speech:

Do not rush to give vent to your anger, although your nature responds more readily to feelings than to reason. My prediction came true, because if you spent the remaining nine parts, the income would be the same - you still would not receive anything.

Vile deceiver! - the merchant could not stand it - I lost my money, and this would not have happened if you had warned that the deal would not bring any income!

“When you came to me,” the soothsayer answered, “from your behavior I realized that you had already made a decision about this deal, and, knowing your nature, I did not dissuade you, because all my efforts would have been in vain.” But I was determined to save you most of the money that you were going to lose and therefore advised you to invest only a tenth in the business. I didn’t tell you the truth, because a person believes only in what he wants to believe, and then a clever lie is more necessary than a useless truth. Let this incident serve as a lesson to you, and the lost money as a reminder to help you avoid many vicissitudes of fate, or even ruin, in the future.

No wonder the wise say: “Smart friends mean a happy life...”

Parents, raising their children, teach them that lying is bad. But sometimes situations arise in which you simply cannot do without a slight distortion of the facts.

In a relationship between a man and a woman, both always want to be completely honest with each other, trust, discuss pressing problems, and share experiences. But in reality this does not always happen. In life, people often play a game by calculating their moves in advance, and not only their own.

If you look back and remember several moments in life, you can understand where we left something out, embellished or hid something. So, for example, when getting ready for a date and taking a long time to choose an outfit, eventually being late for the meeting, women deceive men by telling them that, for example, transport was delayed. Or, rushing to the phone, abandoning everything we are doing, we talk, saying that we are not at all distracted. When we are late for work, we lie to our bosses, saying that something happened to the key, when in fact we simply overslept. Such petty lies are also considered a kind of deception, and they are constantly present in our lives. Even justifying our actions with the well-known saying “better the bitter truth than a sweet lie,” we do not relieve ourselves of responsibility. There are, of course, situations that are much more serious. So, for example, having learned that your friend cheated on her husband, you will not go to tell him the truth, because you hope to save the family, and by telling him, you will become enemy number one. You will also become one if the betrayal is discovered. This raises the question: who needs such truth?

Most people deceive others because of differences in their perception of reality. So, for example, if you know how a person will react to a particular situation, you think that it would be right to hide something in order to avoid misunderstandings and an explosion of emotions on his part. An elementary situation: you went to a club with your friends and hid information from your young man so as not to upset him. But if he finds out about this, trouble cannot be avoided.

We also often justify our lies by saying that we don’t want to spoil our relationships with our friends. So, for example, if you don’t really like your friend’s companion, you will never tell her about it openly, since you can offend her with these words, and in the future the relationship can completely deteriorate.

Therefore, a white lie should not always be perceived very negatively. Sometimes there are omissions and interpretations in the description various situations can prevent conflict, save friendships or relationships. This is especially true for women with their fantasies, emotions and inability to initially adequately assess the situation. However, you should be careful not to constantly hide anything from your loved ones.

Sometimes, after all, the truth can be presented in such a way that no one will be offended or upset, if you think everything through well beforehand and formulate your thoughts correctly.

The material was prepared on the basis of open sources.

Margins around the form

Since time immemorial, humanity has lived in a false world, which is such thanks to man. All people lie: from the cleaning lady to the president. How more people They lie, the more they understand that doing so is ugly, but knowing this does not stop them from lying less. Some are in small things, some are larger and larger-scale, but there is not a single one who does not lie. It is believed that lying is a bad, terrible habit that needs to be fought. The one who lied is shamed and scolded. It's funny that the one who shamed yesterday is ashamed himself today. The man is quite a contradictory nature. On the one hand, he considers it an absurd thing to lie, and on the other, no less ugly, to say what he thinks. Although those who are blessed with straightforwardness lie less - they do not take the opportunity to think about what to say, and thus do not have time to come up with a lie. Why is straightforwardness also a vice? Because, as they believe, in this way you can offend a person by telling an unpleasant interlocutor that he is really not attractive. It is believed that it is better to remain silent. But by holding back our words, we nonverbally express sympathy. In this case, it’s still time: isn’t a sweet smile to an unpleasant person a lie? Of course, if you go into more detail into facial expressions and gestures, you can catch what will express your true attitude, but this, alas, is only given to a professional. Is this how people want lies to disappear? One can imagine a world where there is no such thing, and everyone tells each other only the truth. Ugly people or not very smart people will not be flattered about how good and smart they are, and the truth will depress them even more. And if now people are fanatically trying to be like some ideal they themselves invented, then what will happen then? The number of notorious, unhappy, angry people will increase, and as a result, the mentally ill. And if now they think that lies are the cause of many disasters, then in that fantasy world they would have thought so in relation to the truth. Humanity cannot even imagine what negative global proportions the general truth would reach. Now politicians different countries we have to smile at each other and, so as not to offend anyone, a country with a bad economy, low GDP and so on is called “developing”. In a “truthful” world, these countries would be honestly called “underdeveloped” or “wild,” which would cause conflicts and wars: not for lands, oil and other resources, as now; a war would be provoked by human resentment and patriotism - how is it that the American president told the whole world that all other countries are underdeveloped? It’s touching when parents read a lot of books, something like “How to teach a child not to lie.” They probably don’t think that this is a priori impossible. How can a child not learn to lie when he has been lied to since birth? About the fact that if you don’t listen, the old woman will take you away, about Grandfather Frost, finally. And aren’t everyone’s favorite fairy tales about non-existent characters and talking animals a lie? They also lie about how the child was born, saying that it was found in cabbage or brought by a stork. I always wondered why it was the stork that was in the cabbage? Of course, parents are more satisfied with the truth. And instead of the usual: “Mom, I’m at Lyuda’s, we’re teaching math,” it will be easier to hear, “No, why do we need this math. We walk and drink vodka. There are four guys here and they are all so cute.” The parents will calm down and fall asleep serenely - after all, the daughter told the truth! Has anyone ever thought that lying is one of the components of happiness? Especially the one that is called “white lie.” Yes, my beloved lied about being at work, but only so that once again don't worry your wife. Trying to fight lies, people deliberately do not want to eradicate them. After all, it’s simpler, it’s better, one might say it’s more humane. Lying helps when applying for a job, in love relationships and communicating with other people. People do not want to know the whole truth; they prefer to be deceived.

What if men told the truth: Lies versus Truth.

Lies versus Truth part 2. What if women told the truth
Margins around the form