Everyone always lies. The ability to deceive is an ability that is inherent in human nature. Throughout our lives we deceive even themselves.
Lie can be harmless, sometimes even to our salvation: we deliberately say the wrong things in order to protect a person close to us from the bitter truth.
But sometimes the lie is not so harmless . It can seriously harm someone and lead to trouble.
To minimize the possible negative consequences of someone's lies, learn to recognize a liar.
Here main signs, indicating that there's a liar in front of you:
How to spot a liar
1. He covers his lips or covers his mouth
When a person cheats, they often touch the face, especially the mouth area. Such movements are performed on a subconscious level, as if the liar is trying to hide any further conversation about something.
If it hand covers mouth- This is an absolutely clear sign of deception.
2. He looks closely and for a long time at the interlocutor
This is classic behavior from a liar who is very likely deliberately trying to deceive you. It is likely that a liar will look at the interlocutor for a long time and intently, without blinking.
Thus, the liar wants to divert any suspicion from himself and demonstrate real honesty.
However, statistics tell a different story:
According to studies, people who tell the truth maintain eye contact for a little more than half of the entire conversation. While a liar will stare at you throughout almost the entire conversation.
3. He blinks quickly
Another situation may arise: people who feel uncomfortable blink faster and more often. As a rule, a liar commits 5-6 blinks in a rowd.
This reaction may be a manifestation of stress. There is another explanation for such frequent blinking: it is quite possible that this is a sign that the person telling a lie is trying to be more convincing.
One way or another, you should pay close attention to the person who blinks frequently. This may be a signal that they are trying to deceive you.
How to recognize a liar in communication
4. He uses pointing gestures
Liars gesticulate actively. This can be expressed either physically or verbally. Thus, they try to distract the interlocutor from their lies, focusing his attention on another topic.
He may also be trying to shift the blame and protect himself. The liar moves his finger and becomes aggressive.
All this proves that a person who tells a lie feels that he can be caught in a lie and tries to distract his interlocutor to the last.
5. He pays attention to detail.
A person who lies spends a lot of time on unnecessary details and provides the other person with more information than necessary.
Too much information can be a clear sign that someone who talks too much does not have a clear conscience.
Perhaps the psychology of a liar works like this: the more eloquent he is in a conversation, the more open and honest he seems to the interlocutor.
Signs of lying by gestures
6. Fidgeting and nervousness
We can all feel restless or a little nervous from time to time. But if the nervousness of your interlocutor is too obvious, then this may be a clear sign that this is a liar.
While fidgeting, he can perform many different actions, indicating that he is this moment the person is lying.
For example, a liar straightens his clothes, loosens his tie, fiddles with jewelry, tucks locks of hair behind his ear, wipes his glasses, fidgets with his fingers, cleans his nails, straightens his notebook, twirls a pencil, or wipes sweat from his forehead.
All these actions and some others indicate that the person is currently uncomfortable due to the fact that he is telling a lie.
Nonverbal signs of lying
7. Convulsive throat, sore throat and pursed lips
Is your interlocutor swallowing saliva convulsively, trying to clear his throat, or pursing his lips? Everything indicates that the person is anxious and stressed.
When we are in this state, our body slows down its saliva production mechanism. This causes your mouth to feel dry and uncomfortable.
A liar can be identified by the fact that he begins to quickly swallow saliva before saying anything.
He purses his lips, keeping his mouth closed.
8. Inconsistency between verbal and nonverbal gestures
Typically, our physical actions correspond to the words we speak.
For example, when we agree with someone, we nod as a sign of agreement, and if we disagree with something, we shake our heads from side to side, as if saying “no.”
Inconsistency can manifest itself in the following moments: a person waves his head negatively, saying “yes,” or nods his head, but says a negative “no.”
These contradictory actions are a clear sign that the person is not telling the truth.
Signs of lying by voice
9. Change in voice
Depending on the situation, a liar is able to change the intonation in his voice. He may speak quickly or suddenly slow down, speak quietly or raise his tone, or speak louder than usual.
It is likely that the liar will begin stutter when trying to remember details. If he tells the truth, he is able to remember the necessary information without much effort.
This article is about the signs of nervousness and its causes.
People at any age experience mental stress. If a child can laugh with tears in his eyes, and a teenager forgets about unhappy love after 3-4 days, then an adult worries about any reason, and scrolls through unpleasant thoughts in his memory for a long time, cherishing them inside himself, thereby driving his psyche into a state of stress.
This is explained by the fact that with age, immune defense decreases, hormonal levels change and a person becomes more and more prone to a negative perception of reality. And reasons to be nervous modern world enough - excessive haste, daily stress at home and at work, stressful work, social vulnerability, etc.
Why are we nervous?
- The conditions of human existence have changed, as biological species. At the beginning of evolution, man led a natural lifestyle: the level of physical activity and the neuropsychic stress necessary for survival corresponded to each other. The habitat was ecologically clean, and if it became unsuitable, the community of people changed it to another without trying to change it.
- The information environment has changed. Every decade the amount of information accumulated before doubles. Scientific and technological progress has a colossal impact on the brain: the speed at which information is received does not correspond to the biological capabilities of its assimilation, which is aggravated by a lack of time.
Children at school, especially diligent ones, experience information overload: the mental state of a first-grader when writing tests and the state of an astronaut at the moment of take-off of the spacecraft are comparable.
Many professions also create information loads: an air traffic controller, for example, must simultaneously control up to two dozen aircraft, and a teacher must pay enough attention to dozens of students.
- The growth of urban populations has increased the density of human contacts and the degree of tension between people. The number of unpleasant and inevitable relationships in public transport, in queues, and in stores has increased. At the same time, beneficial contacts (for example, family contacts) have decreased and take only about 30 minutes per day.
- The increased noise level, especially in cities, exceeds natural norms and has a negative impact on our psyche and the body as a whole: it changes arterial pressure and breathing rate, sleep and dream patterns are disturbed, insomnia and other adverse symptoms develop. We are exposed to noise almost constantly, sometimes without noticing it (TV, radio).
- Bad ecology also has indirect influence on the brain and psyche. High level carbon monoxide in the air we breathe reduces gas exchange in the brain and its performance. Sulfur and nitrogen oxides disrupt brain metabolism.
Radioactive contamination occupies a special place in the deterioration of mental functioning: our nervous system suffers greatly from its high level. The psychological impact of this factor aggravates the harmful effect, generating fear.
- The scientific and technological revolution has improved the material conditions of human habitation, but at the same time significantly reduced its margin of safety. A decrease in physical activity has led to disruption of the biological mechanisms of the human body.
Strong emotions are usually a defensive reaction to manifestations outside world. We get nervous if we are not confident in ourselves, in our present, we experience fear of the future, dissatisfaction with ourselves and others.
Any living organism, in the presence of a threat, responds with compression (muscle tension) - to become invisible, to hide so that the “predator” does not notice or eat. In the modern world, this “predator” has transformed into different images social, public environment: level of well-being, relationships with superiors, fear of responsibility, fear of criticism and condemnation, small pension, impending poor old age, etc.
These social “predators” scare us, we want to hide and not think about them, but our thoughts always return to unpleasant things willingly and spontaneously. From here it arises again and again nervous tension, which means the body instinctively contracts.
What happens to the body during nervous tension
Strong and prolonged emotions plunge the body into a state of stress: muscle tone increases, heart rate accelerates, digestion slows down, sweating increases, the stress hormone cortisol and the action and anxiety hormone adrenaline are released into the blood.
All internal resources are mobilized to overcome danger, the body is ready for quick action.
Such a defensive reaction is an ancient form of response, genetically determined and necessary for the survival of humans as a biological species. It involves physical activity, the body must work off “adrenaline”. And that is why physical activity helps with nervous tension.
Thus, nervous tension is always accompanied by unconscious muscle tension. With constant nervousness and a sedentary lifestyle, muscle tone becomes chronic. A person seems to be encased in a muscular shell; movement within it requires enormous energy expenditure. Therefore, fatigue is a faithful companion to nervous states.
Due to constant muscle tension, performance decreases, irritability appears, and the functions of the digestive, cardiovascular and other systems and organs are disrupted.
Signs of nervous tension. How to help yourself
Nagging pain in the back, lower back, neck, shoulder girdle. With any nervous overload, the tension of the skeletal muscles increases, while the muscles of the neck, shoulder blades and biceps bear increased load.
Bring your index finger and thumb together and clasp them tightly on both hands.
Do full body stretching exercises and different groups muscles.
Massage your ankles, moving up to your thighs. Do the same for your arms, moving up from your hands to your shoulders.
Sleep disturbance. It is well known that the best and safe medicine when nervous, it’s a dream. However, if you go to bed with a load of problems, then your brain continues to solve them in your sleep, which does not allow you to fully rest. Lack of sleep, in turn, leads to depression. It turns out to be a vicious circle.
A phyto-pillow will help - mix herbs in the following proportions:
o Mint, meadowsweet, lemon balm, wormwood - 1:1:1:2,
o Yellow clover, tansy color, lavender - 2:2:1,
o Chamomile, rosemary color, yarrow - 3:1:1,
Place this herbal-smelling pillow next to you at night. It is better to push the pillow with hop cones onto the floor as soon as you start to fall asleep. Otherwise, you risk oversleeping for work.
Making a phyto pillow is not difficult: put the herbs in a sewn gauze pillowcase, you can simply wrap it. It is better to store in a paper bag.
Recipes for good sleep will also help restore normal sleep.
No interest in sex. The subconscious of a person in difficult life situation, establishes a ban on receiving pleasures from life. So that he doesn’t get scattered and throws all his energy into solving problems. It turns out to be a contradiction: a person in this state, on the contrary, needs positive emotions, namely the pleasure hormones endorphins produced during sex, because these hormones protect the body from stress and minimize its harmful effects.
It is necessary to have sex during difficult periods of life! Experts advise following biorhythms. In men and women, mutual readiness occurs around 16:00, the most unfavorable time is 18:00. But, of course, these recommendations are conditional.
Refusal to engage in a favorite hobby. All efforts are aimed at eliminating the cause of nervous tension (finishing a project, finishing an article, preparing a report, etc.), but there is simply not enough time or energy for the rest of life. The whole body is like a string, all thoughts are about one thing. This attitude towards the problem aggravates mental and physical discomfort.
Make it a rule to give yourself the opportunity to rest. Let your day off be a real break from all your problems. This will provide the necessary energy to solve troubling problems.
Repetitive actions: finger tapping, leg swinging, walking back and forth. This is a natural reaction of a person to emotional stress, this is how he tries to restore balance and calm down.
Help yourself with similar repetitive actions: you can walk up and down the stairs, touch your rosary, knit. Even chewing gum has a good effect; chewing movements activate cerebral circulation, which increases resistance to stressful situations.
I wish you a positive outlook and health!
How to stop being nervous for no reason
Divide your experiences into two groups in your mind. In the first group, conditionally include worries about real danger (serious illness, people’s experiences after a disaster, complete loss of housing or property, forced relocation, etc.). Such experiences often help a person solve a difficult problem and give strength to overcome real difficulties. And, once the problem is solved, the anxiety goes away. A person, having steadfastly overcome all hardships, finally returns to his usual course.
The second group of worries is anxiety about an expected, but not yet non-existent danger - the husband was late at work, the daughter’s phone did not answer, a friend suddenly stopped calling, the boss did not answer the greeting. Similar situations seem to be harbingers of a terrible tragedy that is sure to happen. In fact, nothing bad happens, and the disaster exists only in your imagination. Such unrest slowly but surely exposes the body to neuroses and mild mental disorders- sleeping pills and sedatives, which don't help at all. When groundless worries become the background of life, apathy, pessimism and depression gradually develop.
What to do if you start to worry
If suddenly something makes you nervous, do not rush to drink valerian, but try to end the situation in your thoughts. The husband is delayed, and you think that something terrible has happened. But this is not the first time. You might have been delayed at work, missed the bus, or been stuck in a traffic jam, and your phone isn’t answering because the battery is dead. And every time a feeling of anxiety arises, convince yourself that the fear is unfounded.
If you are unable to cope with nervous tension on your own, turn to friends or talk to someone close to you. You shouldn’t “turn your soul inside out” in front of just anyone. Select from your environment a person who has sincere sympathy for you. It will be best if your potential vest is an optimist by nature. No matter how strange it may sound, these are the people who really look at the world. Believe this person if he says that your worries are in vain. And you will very quickly see that you were right when you trusted him. Try to avoid communicating with individuals who tend to dramatize everything. Let only positive people surround you.
If you don’t have anyone to talk to at the moment, relaxing music will help calm your nerves. Moreover, it does not have to be a melody for meditation. Any one you personally like. You can pre-select a music library from the most suitable melodies or songs. And connect with nature. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a bird feeder outside the window or just a leisurely walk through a city forest park: nature is the best doctor for a sick soul.
Love yourself, work on yourself constantly. No one needs your attention more than you. Remember this always, and gradually you will learn to preserve peace of mind, and with dignity drive away all unnecessary fears.
Why are we nervous?
Why are we nervous? - a question that cannot be answered in monosyllables. Reasons to be nervous modern man more than enough - daily stress at work and at home, unsettled personal life, stressful work, and so on. In addition, not every person is able to control their nervousness.
Most often, nervousness manifests itself in anger and aggression, in a feeling of fatigue and apathy. When we are nervous, it is extremely difficult to restrain our emotions - facial expressions, speech patterns, and gestures change. The whole body suffers from nervousness. In order to understand how to behave in such a situation, you need to understand why we are nervous.
Why do we get nervous - psychology and physiology
The causes of nervousness can relate to both psychology and human physiology. Among other things, excessive alcohol consumption can cause nervousness.
Causes of nervousness psychological nature– this is too much overexertion and stress, poor and insufficient sleep, anxiety and fear, depression and other psychological disorders.
The causes of nervousness of a physiological nature are familiar to many women PMS, disturbances or changes in hormonal levels, thyroid and gastrointestinal diseases, brain tumors, hypovitaminosis.
A person’s nervousness is a response to an action that, one way or another, does not satisfy the person, is inconvenient and inappropriate for him. For example, on a weekend morning you really want to get some sleep, but noisy neighbors don’t allow you to make your wish come true. In this case, the desire to sleep becomes even stronger. This is where nervousness is born against the background of fatigue, which becomes stronger if a person cannot sleep, or, on the contrary, subsides if he still manages to sleep.
Few people are able to control their nervousness. As a rule, increasing fatigue begins to overwhelm a person. At the same time, nervous tension and all the accumulated fatigue that has accumulated in a person come out for a long time and had no way out. As it progresses, irritation, which has already become chronic, can lead to the development of psychosomatic diseases.
Another feature of why we get nervous is the ability of nervousness and fatigue to accumulate. Nervous experiences, initially unimportant, which a person is still able to control if a way out is not found, begin to accumulate. For this reason, after some time a person becomes like a bomb that can explode at any moment.
Most often, nervousness is seen as a consequence of a person’s dissatisfaction with himself, with the people around him, with his work and family life. The greater the dissatisfaction, the faster irritability will grow. And prolonged nervous tension can easily lead to the emergence of neurotic character traits, the fight against which takes more than one day. Only constant and thorough work on yourself will allow you to avoid the development of nervousness in the future and its transition to a chronic form. Recommendations for an irritable person are that you should try to analyze situations and control yourself.
A person who is constantly nervous and cannot control it in any way should treat reality “realistically”. In other words, the less different the ideas about the world inside a person and the way it really is, the less likely it is to show irritability. In addition, it is worth reminding yourself more often that irritability can become a serious cause of conflicts with others.
I'm nervous for no reason
Asks: Nastya: 38:07)
Hello, my name is Nastya, I am 14 years old.
IN Lately I am very sad and sad, I want to cry every day. And this is completely out of nowhere, without reason. Everything is fine with friends when they are nearby - during the day, I have fun, and in the evening I feel terrible nervousness and even panic.
My heart beats quickly, my toes and hands get cold, I begin to become fixated on my breathing, and when I become fixated, it seems heavy and as if something is preventing me from breathing. But when I’m calm and don’t focus on him, then everything is fine. I can’t sleep normally at night, there are so many thoughts in my head - and I often call my mother so that she can sleep with me at least a little, then I feel calmer.
I understand that these are all terrible nerves and it’s impossible to do this, but I can’t do anything. How can I recover from this? It really prevents me from living a full and good life. thanks for the answer.
Hello Nastya! When you are alone with yourself, you encounter something that prevents you from breathing, what is it? you write that it’s hard for you to sleep at night, you have a lot of thoughts, is there a person to whom you can tell about your experiences? Mom?
A state of sadness and melancholy comes to many people from time to time, and sometimes I also feel very sad. At such a moment, you may ask yourself, what is happening to you? What are you sad about? What are you crying about? How can you support yourself? or from whom do you get support from your loved ones? You are at an age when changes occur in you, your body, your emotional condition the truth can range from fun to melancholy. And these are important changes, try to accept them.
Everything will be fine, I believe in you. Breathe deeply and smile more often) at a meeting with a psychologist you can better understand your condition and find optimal solutions.
Sincerely, Natalia
everything that you describe is typical, alas, of adolescence. Hormonal changes cause you to feel sad, sad and want to cry. Both your body and internal organs. The pressure then increases, then suddenly drops, then the fingers become cold, and the heart begins to beat faster to fill the capillaries with blood. During the day, while you are at school, with friends, you do not pay attention to changes in heart rate or breathing. At home, especially in the evening, when you are already tired, all the small “oddities” in the functioning of your body become noticeable to you. Well, when you start to worry about this, you start, perhaps, counting your pulse, listening to yourself: “Well, what else is wrong with me?”, then of course you find another “symptom”. Well, you yourself know this: “I begin to get fixated on my breathing, and when I get hung up, it seems heavy and as if something is preventing me from breathing. But when I’m calm and don’t focus on him, then everything is fine.”
What to do about it? First, remember that what is happening to you is normal. Yes, it’s unpleasant, but we all go through this - and, believe me, it will pass for you.
Secondly, don't overload your nervous system. Avoid coffee, black tea, and cola. In the evening, teas with mint or lemon balm are good. Start getting ready for bed about an hour in advance - during this time, do not eat, do your homework, or watch action movies on TV. It’s better to pack your things for tomorrow, do some beauty treatments, and calmly talk to your mom about something neutral.
Third, learn to relax. There are many techniques - yoga, breathing exercises, pine baths. When the muscles are relaxed, the nervousness goes away.
I wish you a good and fulfilling life now and always. All the best!
Anxiety is one of the most common emotions. Every person has experienced anxiety many times in their life. People can worry for various reasons: shame, a desire to hide the truth, a responsible situation, and so on.
In most cases, the fact that a person is nervous is quite obvious. But when they try to hide their excitement, the question may arise: How can you tell if a person is worried? This can be done in many ways. We will talk about them below.
How can you tell by their face that a person is worried?
Frequent blinking and “shifty eyes.” When a person is worried, he is in a kind of confusion. He has difficulty concentrating. From this, a person’s gaze begins to “run around”, without lingering long on anything in particular. The eyes blink frequently.
Lack of eye contact. As a result of anxiety, especially if it is associated with the desire to hide the truth, a person tries not to look into the eyes of the interlocutor, looks away or down. This behavior is due to the fact that a person either feels guilty (in the case of lying), or unconsciously, and sometimes consciously, tries to hide his excitement from prying eyes.
Licking or biting lips. Anxiety causes dry mouth. Lips also dry out. That's why people start licking or biting them. When they are very nervous, people bite their lips until they bleed. Naturally, they don't do this on purpose. It's just that when you worry, such things are not controlled by consciousness.
Tense lips. When excited, some people may have trembling lips, especially the lower ones. The tension of the lips, the turning of them as if inside the mouth, is caused by a subconscious desire to hide this trembling.
Facial redness. This autonomic reaction of the body often manifests itself as a result of excitement. It is hardly amenable to conscious control and therefore, in the presence of accompanying symptoms, is a sure sign that the person is worried.
Pupil enlargement. Due to the release of adrenaline during excitement, the pupils can become four times larger than normal.
Cheekbones play. When a person is worried, he can involuntarily tense the muscles on his cheekbones. Men especially often “sin” with this.
Flared nostrils. When you are nervous, there is a strong release of adrenaline into the blood, causing your heart rate to increase. Breathing becomes frequent and uneven. In this regard, a person’s nostrils involuntarily flare. Be careful, the nostrils can also flare from anger, fear or sadness, but in this case they flare much more than from excitement.
How can you tell by their voice that a person is worried?
Fast speech. You can determine that a person is worried by the accelerated rate of speech. If a person, in an attempt to hide his excitement, begins to control his speech, then it often turns out, on the contrary, to be slower than usual (this is also a sign of excitement, although not entirely obvious). The pauses between words become a little longer. This is not noticeable to the speaker, but it is quite noticeable to the listener.
Frequent swallowing of saliva. When you are nervous, your throat becomes dry. This feeling is not pleasant, so the person begins to swallow saliva frequently.
Changing the timbre. In moments of excitement, a person’s voice does not sound as usual. This happens because a person is trying to control him.
Speech through teeth. Wanting to hide the trembling in his voice caused by excitement, a person tries to take control of his speech. As a result, it seems that the person is talking through his teeth.
Other obvious signs of anxiety
Trembling in hands and knees. When a person is nervous, their hands and knees may shake. With strong excitement, trembling can cover the entire body. In such situations they say that the person is “shaking” with excitement.
Hands in pockets. To hide trembling hands caused by excitement, many people try to hide their hands. It's easy to guess that the most suitable place for this is pockets. Sometimes the hands are placed behind the back or intertwined on the chest.
Hands involuntarily clench into fists. For the same reason as described above, the hands are clenched into fists. The only difference is that a person consciously hides his hands in his pockets, but clenches them into fists, as a rule, unconsciously. But for the same purpose - to hide the trembling.
Increased sweating. You can determine that a person is worried by an increase in sweating. Sweat on the upper lip and perspiration on the forehead - sure signs unrest.
Intense gestures. As a rule, during a conversation, if a person is excited, he begins to gesticulate intensively or tries to occupy his hands with something else. For example, he constantly twirls something in his hands or fiddles with a ring on his finger.
Dry mouth. With severe anxiety, dry mouth appears. Because of this, the voice may change and the person begins to cough slightly.
A person constantly experiences some kind of emotion. Without them, he would not have been able to even take a step, they play such an important role in our lives. They can be different: both negative and positive. Some are able to control them, while others are constantly nervous and worried, not trying to change this behavior. But this is a completely unreasonable attitude towards yourself and your health. Because the habit of being nervous, even when there seems to be a reason for it, does not help to deal with a difficult situation, but only aggravates an already difficult situation. Besides this, there are many more reasons why, for your own good, you shouldn’t be nervous about whatever happens.
Why you shouldn't be nervous often
It is impossible to live life without shocks, troubles and joyful events. But if pleasant moments are worth experiencing, unpleasant ones clearly do not deserve to waste not only your time, but also your nerves.
But unlearning being constantly nervous is not so easy. You can't do this without serious motivation. The fact is that changing a person’s behavior pattern is a difficult task, because it takes years to develop. And it’s very difficult to take it and change it in an instant. No one is able to change if he does not understand why it is necessary, what benefit he will receive from it, what he will be saved from and get rid of. No matter how strong his desire and conviction that it will work out, he will not find the strength to overcome all the difficulties that stand in his way. Even if for a short time he will be able to develop several correct habits, such as doing exclusively what he likes, no matter how strange and scary it may sound.
Therefore, before changing your usual way of life, you need to understand, realize and remember in advance what you are saving yourself from by deciding to treat what is happening differently.
Overreacting to troubles causes a host of health problems. First of all, this deals a crushing blow to the nervous system, which often becomes the very cause of a lot of psychosomatic problems and leads to various diseases, ranging from allergies, which can become chronic and turn into eczema, and ending with vegetative-vascular dystonia, which almost untreatable. In general, there is an opinion that the impetus for the development of any disease is nervous tension. So it is impossible to predict what the next nervous shock will lead to. But obviously not good. And over the years the situation gets worse.
True, the opinion that stress is always a threat to the body is quite controversial. According to the scientist Selye, who studied the nature of stress, negative impact It is not the stress itself that causes distress, but distress—stress that continues for quite some time. long time. It doesn’t matter at all whether it is caused by positive emotions or negative ones. It is very important to avoid prolonged tension. It is important to do everything to get rid of it as soon as it arises, by playing sports, listening to music, simply relaxing, or by solving the problem that gave rise to its appearance. You urgently need to distract yourself, do what you love, create an atmosphere of calm, coziness and comfort.
It is not so dangerous to experience joy or sorrow for a short period of time, so you should not try to be a person who does not react to anything at all. Breaking yourself and turning into a soulless robot can in itself cause a lot of health and mental problems.
Any experiences to which an adequate response does not immediately arise become the cause of internal worries and tension. When an annoying situation arises, it is very important to respond to it in such a way that it does not leave any negativity behind. No matter how traumatic it is, you must either accept it as a given and adjust your behavior, or do everything to fight back, get rid of what frightens, hurts, upsets, offends or irritates.
Tolerate, reconcile, or pretend that nothing happened, but in your soul continue to feel resentment, guilt, fear, a desire for revenge - this is the first step towards neurosis and a huge list of diseases that arise in neurotics. Diseases of the cardiovascular system, blood pressure, problems with the digestive tract, muscle pain - this is just a small list of what awaits those who still do not understand why one should not be nervous often.
Pregnant women should not worry, as this will negatively affect the unborn child. This not only harms his health and interferes with his full development, but can also transmit excessive anxiety to him and make him a nervous and restless child.
For healthy people, the habit of worrying rather than solving the problem that has arisen, over time, threatens with a mandatory visit to a cardiologist, therapist and neurologist, and these are just a few specialists who will have to be visited in order to return to a normal lifestyle with the help of medications, or even stay alive. Even if at the moment you do not feel any health problems and are deeply convinced that you should not be nervous about those who already suffer from hypertension, have suffered a heart attack or stroke, think about it, but they were healthy before, it is unlikely that these are their chronic diseases. Why did they buy them?
Why is it bad to be nervous?
In addition to the danger to health, constant tension, feelings of anxiety, prolonged worries, and an overly emotional reaction to what is happening creates additional problems to those that already exist.
Faced with unpleasant events When they find themselves in a difficult situation, offended by someone for something they did or said, people become completely immersed in their emotions. And they lose the energy and self-control necessary to accept right decisions. Instead of immediately reacting to what happened by doing as their soul tells them, they try to find best option solutions to the problem, without considering that their reaction already suggests it. But, without listening to her, they try to act as their inner fears tell them.
When the boss is rude, few people tell him that they are unpleasant similar attitude. On the contrary, in order to convince themselves to remain silent and not react the way they want, everyone begins to remember that they will lose their job, income, and they have a family, loans, utility bills, dreams, etc.
But they do not understand that although this may be true, and it is indeed better to remain silent rather than give a civilized rebuff, the anger remains inside. After all, you can get rid of him only by accepting as a fact that their financial security is possible only with this boss. And no longer allow his offensive behavior into your soul, realizing that he is a deeply unhappy person and his words should simply be ignored.
Similar behavior, when people do not want to fight those who, in their opinion, offend them, without taking for granted that thanks to unpleasant emotions they have the financial status that such an unpleasant job or marriage gives them, leads to the emergence of neuroses, and in advanced cases, to depression, from which it is very difficult to get out.
When a person ignores the small arsenal he has for solving emerging problems and tries to sit on two chairs at once, he dooms himself to a miserable existence. Nature has given us only two ways out. The first is to accept the situation. Don't put up with it, be patient, waiting for it to end. Namely, accept, like the sunrise and sunset, as something that exists and cannot be changed. And the second is to fight and defeat the enemy, to eliminate from life what causes negative emotions so as not to have to deal with this again or to know in advance how to react in order to minimize the consequences.
Whether you want it or not, you will have to make this choice so as not to be nervous anymore, not to experience anger, resentment, fear, irritation, anxiety, nervous tension, lack of self-confidence or self-confidence. Otherwise, emotional and professional burnout, chronic fatigue, asthenia, neuroses and, as a result, depression, which requires drug treatment under the supervision of a psychiatrist and quite possibly in a hospital.
Emotions, undoubtedly, will not disappear anywhere; they are an integral part of a person, an indicator of his attitude to what is happening to him and around him. But when a person is used to experiencing all the time negative feelings, making him nervous, he risks earning himself a whole bunch of diseases. After all, no matter how familiar it may sound, the aphorism that “All diseases come from nerves” very accurately describes the cause of the most dangerous diseases. And awareness of this should become the motivation that will allow you to become more balanced and calm, and learn to avoid irritants.
Any manifestation of external and inner world finds a response in a person in the form of emotions. Our health directly depends on what emotions are, negative or positive, strong or not. This article is about the signs of nervousness and its causes.
People at any age experience mental stress. If a child can laugh with tears in his eyes, and a teenager forgets about unhappy love after 3-4 days, then an adult worries about any reason, and scrolls through unpleasant thoughts in his memory for a long time, cherishing them inside himself, thereby driving his psyche into a state of stress.
This is explained by the fact that with age, immune defense decreases, hormonal levels change and a person becomes more and more prone to a negative perception of reality. And there are plenty of reasons to be nervous in the modern world - excessive haste, daily stress at home and at work, hard work, social vulnerability, etc.
Why are we nervous?
Objective reasons
The human condition has changed as a biological species. At the beginning of evolution, man led a natural lifestyle: the level of physical activity and the neuropsychic stress necessary for survival corresponded to each other. The habitat was environmentally friendly, and if it became unsuitable, then a community of people changed it for another without trying to change itb.The information environment has changed. Every decade the amount of information accumulated before doubles. Scientific and technological progress has a colossal impact on the brain: the speed at which information is received does not correspond to the biological capabilities of its assimilation, which is aggravated by a lack of time.
Children at school, especially diligent ones, experience information overload: the mental state of a first-grader when writing tests and the state of an astronaut at the moment of take-off of the spacecraft are comparable.
Many professions also create information loads: an air traffic controller, for example, must simultaneously control up to two dozen aircraft, and a teacher must pay enough attention to dozens of students.
Urban population growth increased the density of human contacts and the degree of tension between people. The number of unpleasant and unavoidable relationships has increased in public transport, in queues, in stores. At the same time, beneficial contacts (for example, family contacts) have decreased and take only about 30 minutes per day. Increased noise level, especially in cities, exceeds natural norms and has a negative effect on our psyche and the body as a whole: blood pressure and respiratory rate changes, sleep and the nature of dreams are disturbed, insomnia and other unfavorable symptoms develop. We are exposed to noise almost constantly, sometimes without noticing it (TV, radio). Bad ecology also has an indirect effect on the brain and psyche. High levels of carbon monoxide in the air we breathe reduce gas exchange in the brain and its performance. Sulfur and nitrogen oxides disrupt brain metabolism.
Radioactive contamination occupies a special place in the deterioration of mental functioning: our nervous system suffers greatly from its high level. The psychological impact of this factor aggravates the harmful effect, generating fear.
Scientific and technological revolution improved the material conditions of human habitation, but at the same time significantly reduced its margin of safety. A decrease in physical activity has led to disruption of the biological mechanisms of the human body.
Subjective reasons
Strong emotions are usually a defensive reaction to manifestations of the outside world. We get nervous if we are not confident in ourselves, in our present, we experience fear of the future, dissatisfaction with ourselves and others.
Any living organism, in the presence of a threat, responds with compression (muscle tension) - to become invisible, to hide so that the “predator” does not notice or eat. In the modern world, this “predator” has been transformed into different images of the social and public environment: level of well-being, relationships with superiors, fear of responsibility, fear of criticism and condemnation, small pension, impending poor old age, etc.
These social “predators” scare us, we want to hide and not think about them, but our thoughts always return to unpleasant things willingly and spontaneously. From here, nervous tension arises again and again, which means the body instinctively contracts.
What happens to the body during nervous tension
Strong and prolonged emotions plunge the body into a state of stress: muscle tone increases, heart rate accelerates, digestion slows down, sweating increases, the stress hormone cortisol and the action and anxiety hormone adrenaline are released into the blood.
All internal resources are mobilized to overcome danger, the body is ready for quick action.
Such a defensive reaction is an ancient form of response, genetically determined and necessary for the survival of humans as a biological species. It involves physical activity, the body must work off “adrenaline”. And that is why physical activity helps with nervous tension.
Thus, Nervous tension is always accompanied by unconscious muscle tension. With constant nervousness and a sedentary lifestyle, muscle tone becomes chronic. A person seems to be encased in a muscular shell; movement within it requires enormous energy expenditure. Therefore, fatigue is a faithful companion to nervous states.
Due to constant muscle tension, performance decreases, irritability appears, and the functions of the digestive, cardiovascular and other systems and organs are disrupted.
Signs of nervous tension. How to help yourself
Nagging pain in the back, lower back, neck, shoulder girdle. With any nervous overload, the tension of the skeletal muscles increases, while the muscles of the neck, shoulder blades and biceps bear increased load.
Bring your index finger and thumb together and clasp them tightly on both hands.
Do stretching exercises for the whole body and different muscle groups.
Massage your ankles, moving up to your thighs. Do the same for your arms, moving up from your hands to your shoulders.
Sleep disturbance. It is well known that the best and safest medicine for nervousness is sleep. However, if you go to bed with a load of problems, then your brain continues to solve them in your sleep, which does not allow you to fully rest. Lack of sleep, in turn, leads to depression. It turns out to be a vicious circle.
A phyto-pillow will help - mix herbs in the following proportions:
o Mint, meadowsweet, lemon balm, wormwood - 1:1:1:2,
o Yellow clover, tansy color, lavender - 2:2:1,
o Chamomile, rosemary color, yarrow - 3:1:1,
o Hop cones.
Place this herbal-smelling pillow next to you at night. It is better to push the pillow with hop cones onto the floor as soon as you start to fall asleep. Otherwise, you risk oversleeping for work.
Making a phyto pillow is not difficult: put the herbs in a sewn gauze pillowcase, you can simply wrap it. It is better to store in a paper bag.
Recipes for good sleep will also help restore normal sleep.
No interest in sex. The subconscious of a person in a difficult life situation establishes a ban on receiving pleasure from life. So that he doesn’t get scattered and throws all his energy into solving problems. It turns out to be a contradiction: a person in this state, on the contrary, needs positive emotions, namely the pleasure hormones endorphins produced during sex, because these hormones protect the body from stress and minimize its harmful effects.
It is necessary to have sex during difficult periods of life! Experts advise following biorhythms. In men and women, mutual readiness occurs around 16:00, the most unfavorable time is 18:00. But, of course, these recommendations are conditional.
Refusal to engage in a favorite hobby. All efforts are aimed at eliminating the cause of nervous tension (finishing a project, finishing an article, preparing a report, etc.), but there is simply not enough time or energy for the rest of life. The whole body is like a string, all thoughts are about one thing. This attitude towards the problem aggravates mental and physical discomfort.
Make it a rule to give yourself the opportunity to rest. Let your day off be a real break from all your problems. This will provide the necessary energy to solve troubling problems.
Repetitive actions: tapping fingers, swinging legs, walking back and forth. This is a natural reaction of a person to emotional stress, this is how he tries to restore balance and calm down.
Help yourself with similar repetitive actions: you can walk up and down the stairs, touch your rosary, knit. Even chewing gum has a good effect; chewing movements activate cerebral circulation, which increases resistance to stressful situations.
I wish you a positive outlook and health!
Source: Ivleva E.I., Shcherbatykh Yu.V. "Psychophysiological and clinical aspects of fear, anxiety and phobias."
I highly recommend watching the following video about how to overcome difficult situations without driving yourself into stress, draw the necessary conclusions and continue to move forward to healthy life, full of Inspiration, Success, Wealth and Happiness.
Prominent people share their proven and powerful techniques. The film received a Certificate of Recognition from the California State Assembly for its positive contribution.
“A super film, although it didn’t seem so great from the beginning. Thanks for posting. The film is worthy, on the level of The Secret, I would call it “ Step-by-step instruction on finding success,” is one of the many reviews.
Elena Valve for the project Sleepy Cantata.
In the following articles:
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Beauty and HealthLove and Relationships
Most failures in life are most often due to the fact that a person worried unnecessarily and thereby deprived himself of the opportunity to see and do what was important to him. And the reason for this is the peculiarities of everyone’s psyche specific person. After all, one person in any situation can pull himself together and not react so violently at all, while the other is almost hysterical. By finding out why people often get nervous over trifles, you can stop yourself in time and save your health and even life.
Understanding why people are nervous
A person's life is filled with a variety of events. Some make you happy, others make you sad, others destroy the established world, which has to be rebuilt or radically changed. There are no those who would not react in any way to what is happening; emotions are an integral part of a person. They perform an important role: warning, protecting or stopping. But the strength of their manifestation depends on what kind of psyche someone has. When something unpleasant happens or something that a person has not encountered before, he begins to get nervous. True, this is not always necessary and beneficial. Because too much nervous tension can cause many problems.
But the whole life is structured in such a way that it is becoming more and more difficult every day to avoid the reasons that provoke internal tension. The past years leave behind memories of both good and bad events, some of them brought joy, while others left scars on the soul and fear. And more often than not, we subconsciously remember more about those who caused pain rather than joy. And this becomes the reason that with age a person turns into an increasingly tense person, who is more likely to expect bad things than good things and tries with all his might to protect himself from this.
And the surrounding reality is depressing, especially if you listen to the problems of others or watch the news. Negative experiences, failures, problems in self-realization and personal life, constant haste, the imposition that only those who earn a lot and work day and night can be successful - all this creates tension, which over time results in anxiety and, as a result, becomes cause of chronic irritation.
Any event that does not fit into our picture of the world makes us nervous. Because it disrupts the course of events, the comfort zone that we tried to create in order to live more or less calmly. And since no one is immune from various accidents, and the behavior of others is quite difficult to predict, it turns out that with age people become more and more nervous and worried. Some problems give way to others, years pass, something ceases to be unattainable, but this does not inspire self-confidence, because these goals are always replaced by others.
It is also difficult to remain unperturbed because the human psyche has remained virtually unchanged over the past millennia. The process of assimilation of information remained almost the same as when we didn’t even travel on horses, but walked, but the world around us became completely different: too unpredictable and fast.
The colossal events that took place changed environment and it is necessary to constantly respond to this, which is why people are nervous, because they are not mentally ready to immediately process so much information, meet the imposed requirements, the level of knowledge and performance that employers, parents, legislators and many other people would like to see today, and the man himself. After all, in order to achieve success, we are told like a mantra that we need to work hard, study hard, get up early and go ahead.
But people are all built differently, and not everyone can bear such pressure painlessly. In principle, there is almost no one who would argue otherwise. A person can remain calm and achieve success, in the form in which he understands it, only in the only case when he does what he likes and is not in a hurry. You can't be happy, passing life by in order to achieve what is an ideal for others, but not an ideal for him.
When you can’t live in harmony with yourself and the world around you, accepting yourself and it as you are, anxiety, stress, neuroses, asthenia, depression and many other dangerous conditions and diseases that need to be removed and treated with the help of specialists appear on the scene. . Therefore, it is so important to independently find this harmony with yourself, otherwise your whole life will pass under the slogan “Fight with yourself.”
How to stop being nervous
To cope with excessive nervousness, you need to accept the fact that it does not help you get the desired result, but rather reduces the chances of it. Instead of being at your best during a job interview, first date, first day of work, taking exams and any other events that are important to you, you become tense, awkward and unable to use your full potential at 100%. It doesn’t hurt to work on what causes tension and stress. Why are you so worried about this or that, what fears provoke this? There may be a fear of being rejected because you don’t have a high enough opinion of yourself or you think you’re unworthy of love. Find the reasons that provoke nervousness. Having realized what fear makes you worry about an upcoming event, imagine what such a terrible thing could happen if something that frightens you so much happens. The person you like will reject you, so what?! Is life really over here, and there is no one around who will be a hundred times better than him. Or you won’t be hired for this job, but who said that tomorrow you won’t have a job that will become the most beloved and interesting. And if suddenly at alumni meetings you don’t look as respectable as one of them, the earth will stop or it will somehow affect your life in a really negative way. In the end, if you set a goal and take a close look at the lives of successful people, you can see so much negativity that it’s time to envy yourself that everything is not so bad for you. A high level of anxiety is also provoked by certain work, which forces you to experience high stress and find yourself in situations too often. stressful situations. The body is simply forced to be nervous about what is happening. This includes any work with people, the position of a dispatcher, military service and law enforcement agencies, a job where a person is responsible for others and their life and health depend on him. Therefore, such work is usually hired after passing certain professional tests, which should show whether a person has high stress resistance, whether he is ready for such stress and whether he will not get confused in difficult situations. Factors such as constant noise, a large number of people in cities, rush also become the reasons why people get nervous. Living in the countryside, or at least where there are parks and green areas, promotes relaxation, even in urban environments. If this is not possible, be sure to find time to play sports. Physical activity helps strengthen the nervous system. Sports in moderate but constant quantities can relieve tension and teach the body to react less to various irritating factors. Not everything is so sad for those who are confident in themselves. In most situations, they are able to avoid any excitement. They don’t think that by the age of 40 they need to become this and that, have this and that, otherwise they will be failures. They do what they like. They enjoy it, they are satisfied with life and everything they do. Therefore, any events are perceived by them as something to which sometimes it is necessary to react, and sometimes not necessary, and not as a reason once again get nervous. 
No matter how old you are, it is worth remembering that sometimes there is something to learn from children. Of course, adults have much greater capabilities. They know more, they can do it. But they should learn one quality from children, remembering that they were once like that: the ability to quickly switch to other events in their lives, leaving unpleasant memories and traumatic events in the past. This is what allows adults to be much calmer and maintain health for many years. Constantly being nervous, they do not solve the problems that provoked this condition, but only destroy their health, creating unnecessary stress, and complicating the situation even more.
Tags: why people get nervous, how to stop being nervous