Inga Mayakovskaya
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We all have those moments when it seems that things can’t get any worse, that the emptiness inside is forever, and that the meaning of life is irretrievably lost. How to return it, this meaning? Everyone has their own answer, depending on their life experience and level of depression. One will seek the meaning of life through travel, trying to find himself in them or at least get out of a state of melancholy. Another will drown himself in entertainment, a third will go into religion, and a fourth will buy a cat. How can you regain the feeling of fullness of life again? What to look for a way out of the deadlock?
- A radical change in external image. One of the most popular options among girls drowned in search of the meaning of life. All available and not so affordable means are used - strict diets, a complete wardrobe change, a new hairstyle/makeup, a series of procedures in a beauty salon with a course lasting “until it goes away” and even a surgical knife. Will it help? Of course, self-confidence will appear. And many changes in life begin with self-correction. Those very changes that become links in a happy chain leading to happiness and success. Just don't overdo it. Changing your appearance and searching for yourself in image experiments can become an obsession and a “drug” that, instead of calming down, will bring only problems.
- In a healthy body healthy mind! And harmony of spirit and body is impossible in the absence of physical strength. AND back side is - the stronger the spirit (the spirit of the winner), the better health. The right image life - like a “pill” for despondency, depression and states of “whatever it is, whatever it is.” Charging, swimming pool, morning jogging– as a pleasant tradition, life is a sport (let’s go where we’re most drawn), healthy eating etc. There are no cons! Nothing but advantages. In the process of acquiring the habit of a healthy lifestyle, even the need to search for “meaning” is lost - everything falls into place on its own.
- Shopping. A typically feminine remedy for “everything.” Any stress is relieved by shopping. Of course, a shopping trip brings a lot of positive emotions. But the danger of this option is not only in useless purchases and irrepressible spending of money, but in the emergence of a bad habit - to cure every melancholy with purchases. As in the case of eating cakes or in the case of changing your image this method has more minuses than pluses. Learn to treat the blues and look for yourself in what has only positive consequences and creative prospects. Don't let your stress pills turn into bad habits and took over you completely. This is not a “treatment”, but a “respite”.
- Analysis of the situation. Look around. What do you see around you ? Do you have a roof over your head? Don't you go naked? Enough for bread and cheese? And even for a trip to warmer climes? And don’t you particularly complain about your health? So it's time to figure it out psychological problems. When you lock yourself in your shell, think about what is most hindering your life right now? What would you get rid of without thinking? Eliminate sources of irritation, get away from those things and people that make you want to “lie down and go to sleep forever,” radically shake up your life and don’t be afraid of anything. Most often, a state when life loses meaning “covers” in a situation of complete helplessness or loneliness. You have the power to change this. Just start small - understand yourself, stop watching the news that puts you in a state of suspended animation and prostration (sit on social networks, “die” within 4 walls, etc.), look for your inspiration.
- Creation. Easiest to deal with a terrible beast“apathy” (as well as blues, depression and other derivatives) through creativity. Everything that scares you, confuses you, puts you in a state of trance, irritates you, etc., should be thrown out through creativity. Write. As best you can. Clumsily, with errors, in the form of diaries, blank verses or memoirs - this is a powerful antidepressant that allows you not only to lift your spirits and get rid of unnecessary thoughts, but also to understand the meaning. The meaning of everything. Just remember that the ending should ALWAYS be positive! And draw. Whatever you can eat - pencils, construction paints, vegetables from the refrigerator or coal from the stove. Draw your anxieties, fears, emoticons and the future, abstractions and simply your state. Paper and canvas will endure anything. And instead of emptiness in the soul, grace will come. Learn to “drain” the bad in creativity and concentrate the positive from it. Pros: maybe in 5-6 years you will wake up as a famous artist or writer. To all creative people inspiration comes from melancholy and melancholy.
- Adding new colors to life. What haven't you tried yet? Surely, you secretly dream of learning how to belly dance, jump from a diving board into a swimming pool, shoot (very discharges and shakes up the “psyche”), sculpt jewelry or embroider on sofa cushions? Look for yours! An activity that will not only distract and calm nervous system, but will also become a valuable experience, perspective, and the beginning of meetings with interesting people. Get out of the swamp, it's time to act!
- Help your neighbor. The call that “sets teeth on edge” is known to everyone. But in this case we are not talking about throwing a couple of coins to an aunt with someone else’s child on the subway. We're talking about real help. For many people real help to others becomes the true meaning of life. Always remember - someone is now much worse off than you. Look around. While you cherish the “meaninglessness” of your existence, someone is already helping lonely, abandoned, sick and people in difficult situations - in orphanages, hospitals, hospices, in the Ministry of Emergency Situations (and even animals in zoos and shelters). On a voluntary basis, at the behest of the heart. By doing good, a person cleanses himself of unnecessary “tails,” brightens his soul, and attracts joy. Start with a couple of kind words for your offenders, with an unexpected visit to your elderly mother whom you have not visited for a long time, with humanitarian aid to those who need it.
- Isn't it too quiet in your house? Isn't it time to liven up your apartment with the patter of little feet and the sonorous laughter of children? Children are the main meaning of this life. Our continuation, our mark on earth. The appearance of a baby (whether your own or an adopted one) changes your life instantly and forever. True, if a child is only a way to get out of a psychological impasse, then it is better to wait with this “method”. A child will only be a salvation if you are already ready for motherhood.
- If maternal instinct I haven’t woken up yet, and the desire to take care of someone is simply unbearable - get a dog. You definitely won't be bored. You are guaranteed morning jogs ( healthy image life), diet (you can’t eat much when those eyes are looking at you and your long tongue is constantly trying to slide across your plate), new acquaintances (girl, what kind of breed is this? Can Rex and I take you for a walk too?), sincere selfless love and devotion to the tip of the tail.
And most importantly, look for motivation. Without motivation, life controls you. With motivation, you control your life.
If you liked our article and have any thoughts on this matter, please share with us. It is very important for us to know your opinion!
Many of us face unforeseen circumstances. We made the decision to create the life we want. The one we expect.
We take all necessary measures to achieve our goals. But then, when we get to them, something strange happens. We feel that this is not what will make us happy...
At first glance, this situation seems terrible to you. You just realized that everything is in vain. You feel like you've wasted your time, money, and energy. That everything is meaningless. Everything is falling apart...
You feel bad. BUT, it's actually not as bad as you think. On the contrary, this impasse may be the best moment in your life.
Now, when your plan doesn't work, you get to the point of using alternatives. What if you don't have them? This is cool! You have come to create it!
When the life we wanted falls apart, we have the opportunity to create the life we really want. So what do you really want? What do you want to want when you wake up every day? To feel good? This is a great opportunity for you! You can become happy!!!
Key Tips to Help You Create the Life of Your Dreams
1. There are no mistakes in your past. You may think that your life is falling apart because you made the wrong choices or that you wasted your time. Or that it's too late for change...
Yes, you cannot get your time back, but you should realize that it is not wasted. And you didn't make any mistakes. Everything that has happened has led you to the present. You are where you should be. It is your path that brought you here, so that you understand something and decide to move forward. Don't get stuck in negative thoughts, don't feel guilty. Instead, acknowledge that everything is going well and you haven't made any mistakes.
2. You have a choice of actions. Every decision you make has brought you to where you are and given you the life you have. If you don't like what you have now, change your mind.
Was your choice genuine? Did he bring you happiness? Was this something you truly believed?
Hearing that the meaning of life has been lost, one can involuntarily shudder. What does it carry? this phrase? Perhaps this is part of a note written by a person who committed suicide? Or are these the words of one who faces prolonged torment? Lots of pain and suffering in this statement. If there is no meaning in life, then why is it needed at all? A depressive state sets in, which is accompanied by sadness and melancholy, because the person does not understand what to do.
There are moments when a person wakes up in the morning and thinks about how he came to such a life. After all, life turned out to be not at all what he imagined as a child. She is filled with emptiness and disappointment. A person wants to become happy, make his own existence bright, and feel the joy of being. But he doesn't know how to achieve that. This leads to the idea of the meaninglessness of one’s own existence.
Look around, take a closer look at the people. You will easily see that the meaning of our own existence is lost among many people around us. You can see it in their eyes. Sad elderly people, for whom the most important thing in life were children, who unexpectedly left their parents' nest and rushed off into their own, independent lives. Suspended middle-aged people, who are deprived of the chance to realize themselves in this life, sit at home and wait for their existence to end and they can start living with clean slate. Young people who hide behind headphones and are very passionate about rock or dubstep, these teenagers prefer to live with one desire - “leave everyone away from me!” If you look at the faces of such people, you can easily read a reluctance to live, deep depression, and melancholy.
You can also notice completely different people. One is enthusiastically chatting on his cell phone with a friend, the second is playing with the children, the third is having fun at the celebration. Such people do not think at all about the meaning of life. They have something to do. One of two options is possible here. Either they simply prefer not to think about it, or they already have it.
What to do?
It would seem a simple question. You just need to realize the meaning of life and find what is lost. However, here a person usually becomes a victim of social stereotypes, other people's aspirations, and generally accepted attitudes. He strives for one thing, starts doing another, and has a complex about a third. As a result, a person simply walks in circles through his own torment. All you need to do is find the meaning of life.
Everyone lacks something of their own. Someone is deprived of the meaning of life, having lost their job, the opportunity to make a career. Or simply because of the small wages. Another person becomes depressed during a divorce, when family happiness and love are destroyed, and the opportunity to communicate with children disappears. Someone feels bad at heart from the lack of opportunity to establish an emotional connection with someone.
The worst thing is for those people who consider the meaning of life to be finding this very meaning, knowing oneself, one’s own character, and desires. Finding all this today is very difficult. Various religious, philosophical and esoteric teachings do not provide a clear answer to the question “what is the meaning of life?” A person tries to find answers in the natural sciences, lyrics, and music. Often only disappointment befalls him. It seems that everything is there: family, child, work, decent salary, opportunity for self-development. But why do this if everything is decay, the person thinks. Gradually, his interest in everything disappears, insomnia appears, and his head begins to hurt. It is very difficult to continue living like this, so a person tries to distract himself somehow, for example, he starts playing a lot computer games, take drugs, or, much worse, commit suicide.
Return of the lost
Any person who believes that his life has a separate meaning is deeply mistaken. Also erroneous is the idea that the meaning of life can be lost. If you isolate yourself or a narrow family circle, after a while you can feel that the meaning of existence is lost, because the child has grown up and moved away from you, you have lost your job, started to get sick, have ceased to mean anything (this is how a person who withdraws into himself thinks). However, by accepting oneself as part of society, understanding one’s own role as a whole, and not in particulars, one can realize that one cannot lose the meaning of life. All people living on the planet have a meaning to life. It cannot be lost. All you need to do is understand yourself, find your own niche, and realize your abilities for the benefit of society.
There are certain methods that a person who has lost his thirst for life should use.
Respite
Give yourself a break. Life is not the easiest thing. You may be very tired at work, have family problems. This leads to restless thoughts and a gloomy state of mind. From time to time you need to sit in silence, listen to your own thoughts, decide in which direction the thread of your life will develop, what needs to be done.
Take one day to write everything down in a private place. good items your life, as well as the bad ones. This must be done when you will definitely not be disturbed or distracted. The procedure will give you the opportunity to re-evaluate what you really want to get out of life. You will probably understand that the meaning of your life lies in family happiness, traveling around the world, career growth, and helping other people. Only a person himself can know what is of any value to him, what needs to be done. Remember what you have good job. Or perhaps you have a large sum in your bank account. Or you have a loving person.
After the good, you need to remember the bad. Don't get hung up on the current state of affairs. Try to find solutions to problems. For example, you have long wanted to visit loved ones who live very far away. Ask yourself how to deal with this. Come up with a plan to get what you want.
Planning for later life
Set yourself three goals that you must achieve in a year. Goals can be small, for example, saving up for something you’ve been wanting to buy for a long time, getting a new one pet, do exercises in the morning. You can also simply concentrate everything own strength on major positive changes in life.
Don't be afraid to ask friends and family for help if they can help you with what you want to do. Think big often. Life is given only once. It is necessary to live and fully use all its possibilities, without fear of seeming ridiculous. If you want to start new love relationship If you want to find a new partner, first decide what kind of character he should have. Think about where you might meet the right person for you. You will probably need to increase the number of your friends or meet people in an original way.
You can also immerse yourself in some hobby, pay attention to your own child, go to another city, study foreign language. Do what you have long wanted to do.
Finding goals requires leaving your comfort zone. You need to constantly work to achieve your goals, but your life is in your hands, so be brave.
Assessing your own career
Many people believe that the meaning of life lies in labor activity which they are doing. Think about whether it’s good for you to live in the current state of affairs, decide what needs to be done to change the situation better side. Understand who you've always wanted to become.
You have probably always wanted to work in a field that involves traveling around the planet or contacting people. Maybe you like to help our smaller brothers. If you are on the wrong path, perhaps it is time to reconsider your own views on the world of work and ask yourself what you need to do to fully realize your talents.
Ambitions should be greater the further your real purpose is from receiving money. If you want more responsibility at work, talk to your boss and decide if there are opportunities for you. career growth. You may need to take additional advanced training courses. All this must be done with enthusiasm.
Thinking about your own relationships
The most valuable part of life is relationships with other people. Previously, you probably had little time to communicate with old friends or your loved ones, especially if you were immersed in work.
Make time for your own friend. Chat with him over a cup of tea. No reason needed, just chat about whatever you want. Call your brother, sister. Find out what they do.
Visit your parents more often. If this is not possible, you can at least talk to them on the phone. After a stressful working day An ordinary conversation on the phone with a loved one works real miracles, makes it possible to get rid of stress and feel great.
So what's the point?
Summarizing all that has been said, we can draw a simple conclusion: the meaning of life lies in being true to yourself. You must be the creator of your own destiny, try to achieve pure happiness. Try to see the beauty in the everyday. Find meaning in every small circumstance that comes your way life path. First of all, love yourself, and then your life will be filled with great joy and happiness.
Question to a psychologist
Effie, good time. Let me start by saying that in your letter it is not at all clear who you are? What gender? How old are you? And this already makes full communication difficult...Perhaps in life, on the one hand, you want communication, support from friends, but, on the other hand, you do everything to prevent this from happening...Apparently, for this you have serious grounds. The question of meaning arises, as a rule, in difficult moments for a person. It is impossible to invent meanings; they come or don’t come. And even when, at first glance, there is no meaning, this also has a certain meaning)). In order to help you somehow, there is not enough information about you. Who you are? What kind of family do you have, who are your friends? What is your relationship with your loved ones? What are your hobbies? What are the features? And just like that, without knowing a person, it is impossible to offer him some of your own meanings. In such cases, it makes sense to seek support from a psychologist in person. Sincerely, Marina Silina.
Silina Marina Valentinovna, psychologist Ivanovo
Good answer 1 Bad answer 0 
According to F. Nietzsche, “he who knows the “why” of living will overcome almost any “how”...
I recommend that you read about the meaning of life - V. Frankl:
http://psiholog-dnepr.com.ua/view-and-read/logotherapy
Perhaps you can find answers to your questions...
With uv. Kiselevskaya Svetlana, psychologist, master's degree (Dnepropetrovsk).
Good answer 0 Bad answer 1 
Hello, Effie.
It's obvious that you're not going through the most fun time in your life right now. There is a lot of disappointment, fatigue and at the same time powerlessness and helplessness in your letter. Sometimes this condition can be so painful that various desperate thoughts may arise. It feels like you don’t like this state, and you would like to feel the colors of life again, but apparently you don’t know how. In order to start creating a different, colorful life, filled with joy and your satisfaction, you should think and answer the following questions: does this often happen to you? If not often, then when did such a period begin? I consider it necessary to answer these questions for myself, at least in order to understand whether this condition is connected more with your personal characteristics or something external life affects you greatly. In addition, this may be a temporary, crisis period associated with your development and it will pass, you just need support.
It may also be that you yourself do something in your life in such a way that leads you to such a state (if this state is repeated often). And then you should figure out what exactly you are doing wrong, what other options you have. This work is quite difficult, it requires time and the help of a psychologist.
It is also possible that events in your external life or people significant to you somehow influence your mood. Then you yourself can, after analyzing everything latest events, what is happening to you, after analyzing the relationships that are significant to you in life, draw a conclusion for yourself - who or what influences you so much. But then comes an equally important question: what to do about it? Can you let others influence you so much, or will you manage your life yourself?
In any case, you can always seek face-to-face help from a psychologist.
Sincerely
Paryugina Oksana Vladimirovna, psychologist Ivanovo
Good answer 1 Bad answer 1 
Effie, I repeat once again - such periods happen in the lives of each of us. And then it makes sense to ask for help.
When sadness overwhelms you, sometimes you really want to end it all so as not to suffer. However, there is another way out. Judging by the ending of your letter, you are ready to fight. And regarding meanings: it has been discovered that meanings are not given to us ready-made, we discover them throughout life. Sometimes they disappear, but they can be opened and found again. Effie, choose a psychologist, someone you can trust and with whom you are ready to talk. Anything is possible, you just have to start. Sincerely, Svetlana Gorbashova.
Gorbashova Svetlana Vasilievna, psychologist Ivanovo
Good answer 0 Bad answer 1Hello, Effie. This usually happens when you, as a person, have lived your entire life according to parental instructions, rules, attitudes, preferences, but not your own. In this case, you did not live your life, but spent your whole life pleasing to be good. And now you have discovered that you don’t need anything for yourself. Since this was never quoted. And now it is important to again build up the forbidden skill of being yourself. Think about who you are, what you want, and for the first time follow your interests and inclinations, explore life with from the point of view of your interests and your place in it. This is a difficult task if you don’t have childhood experience in this. Therefore, it is important to begin to take an interest in yourself, forcing yourself to do something for yourself. The pleasure of the result will stimulate new interest. And only in this way, gradually it will become a habit. The format of psychotherapy is welcome.
Karataev Vladimir Ivanovich, psychologist Volgograd
Good answer 3 Bad answer 1Yes, you heard right, I said “He will come again”! After all, many people ask themselves this every day, every hour... Perhaps in some world organization dozens of smart people are studying this problem, thinking about it around the clock and cannot find an answer.
This is truly one of the global issues of humanity, and this is not just my speculation! What can I say - try typing this question into the Google search engine and see total requests.
Each of you gets up in the morning, washes your face, has breakfast and gets ready for work, school or somewhere else, each of you does what you know how to do. But some people do something differently: they go to work around lunchtime or in the evening, they do not what they know how to do, but what they like... Someone does nothing at all for days on end, either because they are too small , or because he’s too old. Someone cannot do something purely physically, someone was unlucky - they broke an arm, leg or neck in the gym, someone, like a fat hog, lives with the grief of others and forgot when last time I did something not for myself, but for people.
This is part of the answer to the question I asked. Everyone will have their own answer to this question... I don’t want to say that all the answers will be completely different, this simply cannot be, but the answer of each person depends on his mentality, state of mind and the setting of his life priorities.
Many people live by work and think about it around the clock - their answer to the question will be related to work. Many people live with family and they will answer you: Take time for your family and friends and you will not waste time. But some people just don’t care about you, this issue and everything else... this may be a temporary condition, it may be a way of life, but be that as it may, you will be sent where no one knows the way...
Which of these types of people are you? Have you thought about this? For some reason I started thinking... I don’t know why and most importantly I don’t know what type I myself am... I sometimes lose the meaning of life and then what I did yesterday seems stupid to me, what I did last week seems senseless... I I understand that all this is just stupid fuss, it’s a burden Everyday life... This is all just very stupid, if you look from the outside...
What are you doing?
- I'm studying
-For what?
-To work later!
-For what?
-To make money!
-For what?
-To provide for yourself and your loved ones!
- Isn’t it possible to do this without money?
-No, this has long been impossible: the world is ruled by the economy, the economy is based on money - the world is ruled by money!
Well, doesn't all this sound stupid? But this is simply unthinkable! Is it supposed to be like this? It is here that it is worth mentioning Bodrov’s words:
Who is strong?
-Who's behind the money?
-NO
-The one who has the truth behind him is the strong one!
I don't want to tell you all that I'm flawless, that I don't need money, or that the truth is only mine, but I understand that by reading this article you will think of me as a person prone to lecturing... This is not true...
And I don’t know why I wrote all this, I only know that now I always know how to answer this question when it suddenly arises in my thoughts again...
What to do?
-Do what you do, don’t repeat the mistakes of yours and others, think about those around you, don’t forget your friends, family and loved ones, live and enjoy life!