Every person has the right to privacy, but when you are a real celebrity, albeit one who lived decades ago, your intimate secrets sooner or later they will float to the surface. This is what happened to these rulers, writers and scientists, whose sexual preferences can hardly be called normal.
1. Maxim Gorky
Everyone famous writer- proletarian Maxim Gorky, was faithful to high ideas not only in relation to his homeland, but also in matters of sex. No, of course, he did not refuse it, however, in his youth, when his peers were already fully discovering the wonderful world of sexual pleasures, Maxim behaved a little differently. He also visited “public establishments”, but did not take an active part in the action itself; instead, he watched everything, retreating to the wall and... singing folk songs.
2. Fyodor Dostoevsky
Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky was known as a supporter of rather aggressive sex. Turgenev even compared him with the Marquis de Sade himself. Such inclinations of the writer were confirmed by his second wife Anna Snitkina. According to her, among other things, her husband asked her to describe in detail all the sensations that she experienced while having sex with him. She also emphasized that Fyodor Mikhailovich was incredibly excited by the fact that young Anna found him a sexually attractive man.
3. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
One of the greatest musicians in human history was obsessed with excrement. Although, it must be admitted that he began composing music at the age of 5. So Wolfgang Amadeus wrote 600-odd pieces of music, as well as a bunch of letters to his cousin, where he quite openly admitted that he dreamed of “defecating on her face.”
4. James Joyce
The greatest writer of Ireland and the surrounding area, a pioneer of modernist literature, the creator of such masterpieces as “A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man,” “Dubliners” and “Ulysses” was very fond of unconventional sex. While away, he liked to write long and frank letters to his wife Nora. If it weren’t for them, humanity would never have known that the literary classic loved Nora for her “thick thighs” and permission to blow farts in her face.
5. Catherine the Great
Catherine has always been famous for her restless sexual appetite. There was even a special room in her palace with a huge bed. If necessary, a secret mechanism divided the bed into two parts by a wall - the favorite remained on the hidden half, and on the second the empress, not cooled down from love pleasures, received ambassadors and ministers. In addition, some historians claim that Catherine passionately loved horses, and we are not talking about platonic feelings here.
6. Peter III
The husband of Catherine II had a very unusual oddity, for which some historians classify his sexual orientation as non-traditional. The fact is that Peter III could not achieve an erection until his wife put on a man's military uniform, and not just any one, but the enemy’s, that is, (for that time), the uniform of a German soldier.
7. Benjamin Franklin
Politician, diplomat, statesman, the scientist and inventor forever imprinted on the $100 bill, had fun not only with natural electricity and lightning rods, but also with elderly young ladies. He chose as his mistresses women 20-30, or even 40 years older than himself. Why did he prefer old women as mistresses, although he was a zealous defender of the institution of marriage? Because, as he wrote in a letter to a friend: “They have more experience, they are more reasonable and restrained, they keep secrets better and do not arouse suspicion of adultery. As for what is below the belt, you will never distinguish a young woman from an old one.” .
8. Albert Einstein
The greatest mind of the 20th century, of course, most of all loved science and only science. Well, and after her - everything that moves, and what the skirt is wearing. He was married twice (once to his cousin), and honestly cheated on both wives. Although, it must be said in his defense, he presented his first wife with a list of rules, which included a clause stating that she should not expect “neither intimacy nor fidelity” from him. Before marrying his cousin Elsa, he almost tied the knot with her 22-year-old daughter. In addition, he had intimate relationships with almost all of his female relatives.
9. Marquis de Sade
The French aristocrat, writer and philosopher, became famous due to the fact that he was a preacher of absolute freedom, not limited by morality, religion, or law, but only by satisfying the aspirations of the individual. At a time when showing your knee covered in a stocking was considered the height of immorality, the Marquis de Sade (actually a count) wrote about things that would make even modern man hair stands on end. That's why he was imprisoned. True, immediately after leaving the gloomy dungeons, he organized a paradise for a pervert in his castle, settling sex slaves of both sexes there for his pleasure. Having spent a total of 32 years in prisons and psychiatric hospitals, the Marquis de Sade gave the world the term “sadism” and explained that you can give yourself pleasure by lashing someone with a whip.
10. Jean-Jacques Rousseau
To achieve sexual arousal, the great French writer had to be spanked, or better yet, whipped. “He who loves punishes well,” writes the inventor of direct democracy. He also admits that this strange feature was created by his own governess, who in childhood spanked the child for any offense.
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During the Great Patriotic War in one of the palaces of Tsarskoe Selo a group Soviet soldiers I came across rooms decorated in a completely crazy erotomaniac style. One of the walls was completely covered with phalluses carved from wood. different shapes, along the walls there were armchairs, bureaus, chairs, screens, decorated with pornographic images.
The soldiers - the oldest was only twenty-four years old - were amazed and clicked several films with their “watering cans”. The young guys didn’t loot or break furniture, they just took a couple of dozen photographs as souvenirs. Most of the tapes were lost in the fire of war, but a few photographs still fell into the hands of Peter Wodic, who lives in Belgium and is the author of several extremely interesting investigative films.
He came to Russia and tried to find out what happened to the furniture from those five rooms. Alas, he did not find out anything. Museum workers flatly refused to talk about this topic and stated that Catherine the Second did not have any “sex-secret offices.” Then they took us to Gatchina and showed fifteen scattered exhibits from the Hermitage collections. A snuff box, several figurines, a shield with erotic medallions. “Of course,” said one historian who does not work at the Hermitage coldly, “Catherine, being a person of impeccable taste, would not limit herself to such an eclectic selection, but you will never know where the rest of the exhibits are.” The Hermitage staff talked about paintings, engravings, and small curiosities, but they completely denied the existence of furniture. 
However, it is known that in the thirties a collection of erotic art belonging to the Romanov family was catalogued. This collection was shown to selected museum visitors, and evidence of this has been preserved. But there is no catalogue. It, like the entire collection, was allegedly destroyed in 1950. Judging by the stories, a significant part of the exhibits belonged to XVIII century, but who are these storytellers? What did they even understand about art? 
The Hermitage staff admit that Catherine designed a kind of boudoir for Platon Zubov, but immediately deny that anything from this office survived into the 20th century. 
However, it is not. There is a well-known story about how Andrei Ivanovich Somov, who worked at the Hermitage, showed St. Petersburg intellectuals an officially non-existent rarity - a wax copy of Potemkin’s penis, and Vasily Rozanov, by the way, damaged it with his sweaty fingers. And so, by chance and almost by accident, but individual people, whose names I would not like to name for certain reasons, came across a truly large-scale collection of erotica and pornography - the “secret cabinet”. 
Whether it will be possible to find the “erotic cabinet” or whether it will remain a legend, no one can now say with confidence. We talked with Vodich about all this for several hours in a row, considering different possibilities, but came to the conclusion that only chance could clarify the situation. 
This, alas, is the tradition of modern supermuseums - to hide and sometimes even destroy artifacts of erotic art. Yes, in times of rampant pornography and widespread libertianism, culture traders carefully preserve the traditions of bigotry and hypocrisy. And the National Gallery in London, the Louvre in Paris, the Pinakothek in Munich, the Hermitage in St. Petersburg, not to mention the Prado in Madrid and the Vatican in Rome, in the near foreseeable future will, like two hundred years ago, keep erotic art among the seven Swiss locks, away from the eyes of an immodestly curious public. 
Catherine the Great
The Empress loved this word very much. And not only did she love him, she rightfully deserved it. For “Greatness in everything” is the motto of this extraordinary woman! But we will not touch on her state deeds, this is not our task, although we, of course, know that she is both a great statesman and an excellent politician. We are more interested in the alcove side, especially since it has become overgrown with such myths, such legends that it is time to separate the “wheat and the chaff,” since there is plenty of fiction and rumors running around the world and memoirs. What kind of slander was raised against our mother empress, mistaking her excessive sensuality for nymphomania and sexual pathology! To this day, some believe that she actually lined up a company of soldiers and looked out among them for men with particularly large phalluses, for which purpose they wore special covers that emphasized the shape and beauty of the reproductive organ. You have wandered into the wrong century, dear gossips! This really happened among Europeans of the 14th–16th centuries, when it was fashionable for men to put so-called nets on their organs, sometimes of unimaginable sizes, because the cult of the phallus flourished. Well, maybe the men of Siberia still wear some kind of covers, but this is not out of fashion, only out of the desire to protect their male nature from the frosty climate.
D. G. Levitsky. Portrait of Catherine II as a legislator in the Temple of the Goddess of Justice. 1780
They whisper about some stallions that were allegedly not sought for riding for the queen. And the famous English writer and psychologist Diane Ackerman, in her new book “A Natural Love Story,” authoritatively states that such a fact took place in the life of Catherine the Great and that a special design was added to the stallion for safety.
All this is wild nonsense, dear reader, there were some things, of course, but it never reached such a degree of perversity. Although, of course, we won’t argue, with her, love joys blossomed in full bloom, shining with golden scatterings for many and many years, leading all of humanity to amazement, for never before has the institution of favorites achieved such glory, splendor, power and greatness!
Empire of minions! Have you seen this?
And for starters, the pedigree: Princess Sophia Augusta Frederica was born on April 21, 1729 in the small German principality of Anhalt-Zerbst. Her parents are Prince Anhalt-Zerbst and Princess Goldstein. She arrived in Russia in 1744 during the coronation of Empress Elizabeth Petrovna, and in 1745 she married Grand Duke Peter III.
In 1762, after the death of Elizabeth Petrovna and the short reign of Peter III, she ascended the Russian throne. She died in February 1796 at the age of 67. She reigned for 34 years.
She loved order and moderation in everything, with the exception of love pleasures; there was no measure here. And so all my life I followed this “golden mean” of Confucius. Moderation in food, almost asceticism in alcoholic drinks, maximum amount hours at a desk, where government affairs are intertwined with literary activities. Connoisseurs did not rate the literary work of Catherine II very highly, we do not undertake to judge this, we will only say that its genre was quite diverse. There are plays here: the comedies “Oh, Time”, “Mrs. Vorchalkina’s Name Day”, “The Deceiver”, and fairy tales for children, written for educational purposes for her grandchildren, but intended for wide distribution: “The Tale of Tsarevich Chlor”, “The Tale of Tsarevich Fabia." Even the libretto for the opera was written by the queen, and the most famous “Fedul with Children”, the plot of which tells about the ups and downs of poor Fedul, who was left a widower with 15 children. Surprisingly, the opera was staged on the St. Petersburg stage, and the music for it was written by the court conductor V. Pashkevich.
Many believed that Catherine had remarkable talents and a subtle mind. This is how the French envoy Segur writes about her: “She had enormous talents and a subtle mind. She combines qualities that are rarely found in one person. Pleasure-minded and hardworking, easy to home life and secretive in matters of politics. Her ambition was boundless, but she knew how to direct it to prudent goals. Passionate in hobbies, but constant in friendship. Majestic before the people, kind and condescending in society. Her importance was always mixed with good nature, her gaiety was decent.” The French envoy Count Segur states: “She was a majestic monarch and an amiable lady.”
Catherine’s appearance, at least in her youth and years of maturity, is attractive: “She had an aquiline nose, a lovely mouth, blue eyes, black eyebrows, a pleasant look, a charming smile.”
The portrait of Catherine the Great, given by a man in love, is similar to the original, except... for the eyes. Some believed that Catherine the Great had gray eyes. Maybe that’s why indecisive historians, confused by conflicting assessments of the empress’s eye color, compromised and wrote: “She has blue eyes with a grayish rim.” That is, gray-blue or bluish-gray. Do not be surprised, dear reader, that it is not so easy to determine the eye color of reigning monarchs. Even mere mortals' eyes have the ability to change their color depending on the mental state of its owner. Let us remember that there are still contradictory assessments of the eye color of Grigory Rasputin. Green - some say, others - blue, others - gray, others - azure, and still others say: “Rasputin’s eyes are whitish with such deep sockets that the eyes themselves are not visible.”
Let us return, however, to Tsarina Catherine the Great.
She got up early, although somewhat later than the “early bird” Anna Ioannovna, who was usually already on her feet at six o’clock in the morning. Catherine got up at seven - seven thirty in the morning. She worked at her desk until nine o'clock.
At nine in the morning I returned to the bedroom and received reports. When the favorites appear, all officials bow out. Her Highness's doors are always open to her favorites. Then the queen goes to a small dressing room, where the palace hairdresser Kozlov combs her hair. Her hair is thick and long and does not at all correspond to the Russian proverb: “the hair is long, the mind is short.” When she sits down in front of the toilet, they fall to the ground. The queen’s personal apartments are magnificent and equipped with great taste: “It is impossible to imagine anything more elegant and magnificent than Her Majesty’s dressing room, bedroom and boudoir. The restroom is all furnished with mirrors decorated with gold frames. The bedroom is surrounded by small columns, covered from top to bottom with massive silver, half silver, half purple. The background of the speakers is formed by mirrors and a painted ceiling. All three chambers are luxuriously decorated with bronze and gilded garlands around all the columns.”
They finish dressing her in this small dressing room. Her costume is simple: a simple Moldovan dress with wide sleeves. There is no jewelry on the dress. She wears jewelry and a ribbon with the Order of Catherine only to ceremonial receptions. On ceremonial days, the simple suit will be replaced by a red velvet dress, which Catherine called the “Russian dress.” She generally loved to demonstrate everything Russian, even with some exaggeration. All her maids, unlike other queens, are only Russian. While she is performing her toilet, she is surrounded by four chamber-jungfers. Let us remember that at this time Elizaveta Petrovna was surrounded by up to forty ladies-in-waiting. All Kammer-Jungfers are old maids and, of course, ugly.
Staying in a small restroom is a time of great reception. And the room itself resembles a reception room. It is jam-packed with people: here are the grandchildren who came to greet their grandmother, several close friends, the court jester Naryshkin, Matryona Danilovna, who amuses the empress with her jokes, through whom the queen learns about St. Petersburg gossip, which she was by no means averse to.
Catherine's palaces are magnificent. Here is the Winter Palace, where her son Pavel especially loved to live, and Ekateringof, built by Peter I in honor of his wife Catherine, completed by Elizaveta Petrovna, who turned it from a one-story building into a two-story building with twenty rooms on each floor. Having kept the first floor modest and ascetic, as Peter loved, she turned the upper floor into luxurious salons with walls upholstered in white velvet with flowers and satin damask. Everywhere, as if in a museum, there are magnificent paintings in heavy gilded frames. This palace was especially close to Elizabeth Petrovna. This is where she died.
Catherine the Second preferred to stay in the Hermitage - Big and Small. The Hermitage amazed with the enormity of its halls and galleries, the richness of its furnishings, many mirrors and paintings by great masters, and its magnificent winter garden, where there was greenery, flowers and birdsong - at any time of the year. Here at the end of the palace there was a beautiful theater hall. It is semicircular, without boxes, with benches arranged in an amphitheater. Twice a month, ceremonial performances take place here, at which the entire diplomatic corps must be present. On other days, the number of spectators did not exceed 20 people, and the actors complained that they were playing almost without an audience.
In addition to the Russians, a troupe of French actors was discharged from France, who were constantly at a loss: how can they play in an empty hall? There was an intimate Small Hermitage here, into the apartments of which only the closest circle of people were allowed, and the intimacy of which was preserved by a well-trained footman and lady Perekusikhin, but there was an unhealthy rumor about it: they say, unbridled orgies take place there. So what? Kings and kings also need private life. It’s not all about living for show! This way and under nervous breakdown you can fall. Louis XV, who lost interest in his Pompadour to the point of purely physical disgust, when the great woman cried from the coldness of the king, who ran away from her bed at night onto an uncomfortable couch, supposedly from the heat, also had his own “Deer Park” - a small but magnificently furnished building in which young prostitutes grew up for him. Louis XIV, however, did not have a “Deer Park,” but his apartments were always connected by some secret corridors and secret staircases with the chambers of his mistresses. Henry II dug an underground corridor from his palace to the palace of Diana of Poitiers for unhindered communication with her.
In short, there is nothing new in these secret apartments. And there is nothing to be surprised by one foreign ambassador, who, after Catherine’s death, opened two small rooms in the Winter Palace, located behind the empress’s bedroom: the walls of one of them were hung from top to bottom with very valuable miniatures in gold frames depicting voluptuous scenes. The second room was an exact copy of the first, but all the miniatures were portraits of men whom the empress loved and knew.
In 1785, Catherine left the Hermitage and moved to live in Winter Palace. Her private quarters are on the ground floor and are very small. Having climbed a small staircase, you need to enter a room where almost all the space is occupied by a desk for secretaries. Nearby there is a restroom with windows overlooking Palace Square. Here Catherine makes the toilet. This is a place of small outlet. There are two doors in the restroom: one leads to the Diamond Hall, the other leads to Catherine’s bedroom. The bedroom communicates in the back with a small dressing room, where entry is prohibited to everyone, and to the left - with the queen’s study. Behind it comes the Hall of Mirrors and other reception rooms of the palace.
From here the queen goes to church for worship. On certain days, all foreign ambassadors had to take part in this. By the way, about ambassadors. There have long been foreign ambassadors in Russia. But at first they were isolated and their deeds were random. But already under Ivan the Terrible there was a permanent ambassador of the Queen of England in Russia, and under Peter I the institution of ambassadors increased. They represented strong powers seeking friendship with Russia. In St. Petersburg there were embassies of Denmark, Holland, Austria, Saxony, Brandenburg, Sweden, England and France.
The English Ambassador Cox describes the visit of Queen Catherine like this: Great Church in 1778: “After mass, a long row of courtiers of both sexes stretched out, the Empress walked alone, moving forward with a quiet and solemn step, with her head raised proudly and constantly bowing to both sides. At the entrance, she stopped for a few seconds and spoke friendly to the foreign ambassadors who touched her hand. The Empress was dressed in Russian attire: a light green silk dress with a short train and a bodice of gold brocade with long sleeves. She seemed heavily rouged. Her hair was combed low and lightly dusted with powder. The headdress is all studded with diamonds. Her person is very majestic, although her height is below average, her face is full of dignity and is especially attractive when she speaks.”
The empress allowed herself to rest only in the evening and after dinner. After lunch she worked on embroidery, while her secretary Betsky read aloud to her. In the evening - theater, balls and masquerades, as well as card game, to which there was a great hunt and which was subsequently banned by her son Paul, and the cheerful court of the queen became as boring as Versailles during the reign of the secret wife of Louis XIV, Madame Montenon.
This prude, the daughter of a counterfeiter, born in prison, raising the illegitimate children of the king, whom he at first hated, so insinuated himself into his confidence that she pretended to openly proclaim herself the French queen. But how boredom emanated from this “ cold snake"! There are such people, Catherine’s son Pavel is one of them, who have the ability to extinguish the spark of God in everything. Catherine, filled with life and fun, on the contrary, inflated it. Her balls and masquerades are very interesting and devoid of prim court etiquette. Subjects were even allowed not to stand in her presence. Thanks to such spontaneity, the atmosphere at her balls became relaxed, the fun was natural. Much attention was paid to masquerades. If there is one thing Catherine the Great learned from her aunt Elizaveta Petrovna, it was a passion for masquerades. That one had them regularly, twice a week, with great fanfare and a huge number of guests. There were up to 1000–1500 people invited. It was considered a great honor to receive an invitation ticket to Elizabeth Petrovna’s masquerades, which took place in the palace located on the corner of the Moika and Nevsky Prospekt. All the front chambers opened there, leading to a large hall. All wooden decorations and carvings have been painted green, and the panels on the wallpaper are gilded. On one side there were 12 large windows and the same number of mirrors, the largest that you can have. The size of the hall made a colossal impression. Countless masks in rich costumes moved along it. All the chambers were richly lit, with ten thousand candles. There were several rooms for dancing and playing cards. In one of the rooms the empress played “pharaoh” or “picket”, and at ten o’clock in the evening she retired and appeared in fancy dress, remained there until 5–6 o’clock in the morning. Catherine the Great limited the number of masquerades; they took place once a week, and their duration was only until two o'clock in the morning. As for costumes, Elizabeth, who has unusually slender legs, invariably appeared in a man's outfit, each time in a different one: once she was a page, another time a French musketeer, and then a Ukrainian hetman. Catherine, who did not have the graceful legs of Elizaveta Petrovna, wore men’s clothes not for masquerades, but out of necessity, for fishing or horse riding, and at masquerades she appeared in women’s dresses, but so filthy and poor that she always achieved the desired incognito, but brought the courtiers to funny incidents.
A certain courtier wrote in his diary: “A woman’s mask, dressed very simply and not very neatly, comes up and stakes a silver ruble. The banker objected dryly: “You can’t bet less than a chervonets.” The mask, without saying a word, pointed to the image of the empress on the ruble. “There is every respect for her,” said Freigold, kissing the portrait, “but this is not enough for the bet.” The mask suddenly shouted: “All in.” The banker got angry, threw the deck of cards he was holding in his hands at her, and, handing him another ruble, said with annoyance: “Better buy yourself new gloves instead of these holey ones.” The mask laughed and walked away. The next day Freigold found out that it was Catherine. “Your lame major is good,” she said to one of the courtiers. “Almost beat me up.”
There is no doubt about the impunity of such an act. Ekaterina had an excellent sense of humor. Old General Shch. once introduced himself to Catherine. “I didn’t know you until now,” said the Empress. The confused general answered not entirely successfully: “Yes, and I, Mother Empress, did not know you until now.” “I believe,” Catherine objected with a smile. “Where can anyone know me, a poor widow!”
She would, of course, remain a widow for the entire thirty-four years of her reign, but by no means poor, and most importantly, not lonely. The rude word “lover” does not really suit the men whom Catherine allowed to approach her. She adored her favorites, of which there were enough over the three decades of her reign, from 12 to 26, but their qualitative significance was much higher than, say, that of her predecessor Elizaveta Petrovna. Under Elizabeth, they served exclusively for love pleasures; under Catherine, they served not only her, but also the state. Catherine's favorite is always rich, noble, and idolized. He is charged with the duty to have personal dignity.
And if some “little little bird” that caught the attention of the Empress, well, simply doesn’t have them, he should immediately acquire them: fall in love with literature, learn some foreign language, play the piano himself. musical instrument and adore music, as well as know palace etiquette and be able to express themselves gracefully. “We all learned a little, something and somehow” - these words of Pushkin are most suitable for Catherine’s favorites. She skillfully created from modest opportunities “magnificent”, “great” and even “brilliant” personalities with whom it would not be a sin to surround the empress.
However, Catherine bowed before true genius and talent without unnecessary praises and honored without idle colorful words, for she knew how to distinguish gold from glass. Such a favorite, after she lost her love for him, became for the rest of her life her sincere friend, buddy, adviser in all matters, from love to state affairs, and became her first assistant. This is what happened to Prince Potemkin.
Everyone praises Catherine's favorite to the skies, of course, more from a desire to please the queen than from sincere feeling. He gets a big position, and if he is also vain, then he will be allowed to run the state a little. But only a little! Catherine did not want to share power with anyone. This is not Anna of Austria, who, having fallen madly in love with Cardinal Mazarin and secretly married him, became almost his slave, without her own voice. Time for business, time for fun, as they say. And Catherine distinguished fun from business very significantly. “I rule the state, and you do what I deem possible to give or take” - as it was suggested to her favorites. But it cannot be said one hundred percent that the queen mother was always free in her feelings. There were times when her state affairs suffered greatly from her mood.
In 1772, Catherine II did not read anything for more than four months and almost did not touch papers, as she was busy with the affairs of the Orlov family.
“I received great sensuality from nature,” writes Catherine in her notes. Of course it is. Only in scientific medical terminology is this called either sexual hysteria or nymphomania. “Catherine was never a nymphomaniac,” says historian-researcher K. Valishevsky. Practice says something completely different. Whatever we call Catherine’s immoderate sensuality, there is only one conclusion - for her it is exaggerated, which means it is abnormal from the point of view of an ordinary person. Give your sensuality such gigantic size, nurture her with such cynicism, shamelessness, with complete absence elementary female modesty, which is already inherent in a woman’s very nature, isn’t this a pathology?
To trample on your gender, your great title, your mind, your genius, and finally, your high mission, satisfying animal instincts - isn’t this a crime against humanity? - say too jealous moralizers. From the scientist Forel we read about the pathological phenomenon of satyriasis in men and nymphomania in women, when they are in the grip of so-called lust and when they are unable and unable to do anything else but satisfy their scorching physical passion. Was this the case with Catherine? Yes, in last years life, during the period of aging, one could detect these traits of excess in her, when vile orgies were held in the secret room of the Hermitage, but basically her love fervor, outwardly at least, was quite decent.
Yes, the state treasury suffered greatly from the appetite of the favorites. And who will calculate the moral damage? After all, moral principles were overthrown. Many dignitaries of that time pointed to the negative phenomenon of “favoritism.” Thus, Prince Shcherbatov, in a letter to a friend, openly denounced this shameful phenomenon in Russian life, for the royal court, which legally cultivated adultery, contributed to the decline of morals in Russian society, since society took its example from the court.
Catherine not only did not hide her relationships with her lovers, but clearly preached them, raised them to a pedestal, and made them a kind of cult. Otherwise, why would she decorate all the walls of her small boudoir with magnificent miniature portraits depicting her long-term and short-term lovers, like a museum rarity, for everyone to see. Her cynicism in matters of morality and ethics is unparalleled, and this despite all the sanctimonious appearance of a champion of moral standards. Let us remember how sharply she spoke out against the free morals of French actresses or with what passion she fought against the traditional washing of women and men in the same bath.
The appointment of the favorite was carried out very quickly, although not without a certain ceremony. All young officers who actually had or believed that they had beautiful figure, and in particular, excuse us for the indecent frankness, the impressive phallus, which, given the then fashion for tight white leggings, was not difficult to detect, could count on special service in the palace apartments of the queen. She loved to go into her private rooms among two rows of handsome young men, proudly displaying their charms. The courtiers laughed: “The palace apartments were a place where the lower part of the torso was especially valued.” Many families based their hopes on some young relative who ended up in the empress's retinue, if, in their opinion, his build deserved the attention of the watchful eye of the empress.
At an evening reception, the courtiers suddenly noticed that the empress was staring at some lieutenant. The next day, a promotion awaited him - he was appointed aide-de-camp to the queen. The post of aide-de-camp is the road to the alcove of Catherine II. During the day young man a short note called to the palace. He undergoes a medical examination by the Empress's physician, the Englishman Rogerson - a precaution that is far from superfluous in caring for the health of the Empress.
After all, Catherine in no case could have made the mistakes of her predecessors - Ivan the Terrible and Peter I, who without special precautions indulged in love affairs, without thinking about its consequences. Historians and chroniclers, so as not to diminish the greatness of the genius, bashfully remained silent about the venereal disease of Peter I. Only two dared to break this taboo: emigrant Stepanov in 1903, yes modern writer Valentin Lavrov. The latter not only mentions this incident, but also goes into detail: with whom and when.
And other historical examples in this regard are far from reassuring. The royal courts of advanced European countries were infected with venereal diseases. King Louis XV's surgeon, Peyron, routinely treated court ladies for syphilis.
Louis XIV was sick with syphilis and had difficulty recovering in his early youth. And the court doctor treated him with everything for seven whole months: he washed his organ with formic alcohol, forced him to drink bull’s blood and some mysterious elixirs, the recipe of which was kept in great secrecy. He barely cured me, because there was no life-saving penicillin then.
Henry VII's physician treated him for syphilis for a very long time with a mercury-based medicine, the composition of which was kept in deep secret.
The great Frederick II, who was not specifically a Don Juan, managed to get a severe form of syphilis from a prostitute and remained infertile for the rest of his life.
Surgeons were forced to remove Cardinal Dubois's genitals altogether, since untreated, chronic syphilis gave him a dangerous ulcer on the bladder. The courtiers maliciously sneered: “ great person will go to the next world without his manhood.”
Queen Elizabeth fled Vienna because her husband infected her with gonorrhoea. An incorrigible Don Juan, the French king Henry IV, suffered from this disease an infinite number of times, in whose democratic alcove a variety of ladies visited: aristocrats, courtesans, actresses and many peasant girls, in total, as the not entirely objective chroniclers say, up to eleven thousand, for this one is overly sensual the king had a weakness for the female sex in all its diversity: from secular ladies and prostitutes to nuns inclusive. And he especially loved these “black” pious quiet people who served God: they brought the necessary spice to his sexual intercourse. Well, I received a “reward” from such a nun Katerina Verdun - severe syphilis. I recovered by force.
The father of Catherine de Medici suffered from a severe form of syphilis, who inherited this heredity not in its direct form, but in her frail offspring, including Queen Margot and her son Charles IX. Venereal diseases at court are the scourge of the Renaissance; it is not for nothing that King Francis I was so mortally afraid of contracting them that, being very eager for love pleasures, he forced his mistresses, regardless of their social status, even famous society ladies, before going to his bed , undergo a humiliating gynecological examination procedure from the court physician. Some husbands were absolutely afraid of sexually transmitted diseases that their wives could pick up in the king’s bed.
So, after a medical examination, Catherine’s favorite was entrusted to the care of Countess Bruce, whose task was to take care of the chosen one’s appropriate wardrobe. The next stage of testing he undergoes at the alcove lady Mrs. Protasova, and then he, checked, washed, dressed in the finest shirts and hastily trained in palace etiquette, is taken to the prepared apartments. Comfort, unprecedented luxury, and servants await him here. Opening his desk drawer, he discovers 100,000 rubles in it (the constant rate for sexual services to newly-made favorites).
Then he is solemnly escorted to the Empress's bedroom. In the evening, cheerful and contented, the empress appears before the assembled court, leaning on the hand of her favorite. By her mood, the courtiers will know whether he is retained in his position. If not, he will be released with God and even the 100,000 rubles reward will not be taken away. Let us remind dear readers that with this money he could have bought three thousand serf girls.
But now the favorite has been confirmed. Exactly at ten o'clock in the evening, having finished playing cards, the empress retires to her bedchamber, where her favorite slips in after her with a nimble mouse. From now on, his future depends only on himself. If the empress is satisfied with his services, he will remain in his “golden cage” for as long as the empress wishes, unless, of course, unforeseen circumstances arise for his somewhat premature resignation, which happened to the empress more than once.
From the moment of his confirmation to the position of favorite, he will accompany the queen everywhere, in all her departures and exits. When traveling, his apartment will be located next to the queen’s apartment, and the beds will be disguised with a huge mirror, which, with the help of a special spring, can move to the side - and now the double matrimonial bed is ready.
The position of favorite is very well paid. Much more than all other positions. Unheard of wealth and royal honors await the lover, and if he is ambitious, then fame. From now on, he no longer has to worry about his future. If after some time he is shown the door, he will not leave empty-handed. He will take with him donated estates, palaces, furniture, utensils, some thousands of peasant souls, he will be allowed to get married, go abroad, in a word, he will be made happy for the rest of his life. It is estimated that Catherine the Great distributed 800 thousand acres of land to her favorites, along with the peasants inhabiting them and 90 million in money. The position of favorite thus became an official government institution. What the first Russian queens began timidly, what Elizaveta Petrovna introduced with some courage, was brilliantly improved, elevated, and introduced to the rank of honorary titles by Catherine II. With what disarming simplicity and naturalness she accepts the services of her favorite, without making any secret of it, even in front of her grandchildren. Here in the evening a friendly family gathers in her apartment: son Pavel with his wife and children and the favorite. They drink tea, joke, talk about family matters, then the family delicately says goodbye, the grandchildren kiss their grandmother’s hand, she kisses them on the cheek, and leave, leaving the favorite alone with the queen.
Everything is decent, like in a respectable family. No one ever expressed any censure at court about this. Only foreigners were indignant, believing that Catherine was compromising both her deeds and her great name. She herself sincerely did not see anything discrediting her in this.
Well, what’s wrong with this that Catherine raised the bed to the highest pedestal and created a cult of sensual love? She was not only sensual by nature, but also an educated, well-read woman, and also a German, where the cult of the bed had its own historical traditions. “When you go to bed, you will acquire your rights,” says an ancient German proverb. And sexual insatiability was one of the features of this era, serving three cults: food, drink and sexual pleasure. And if Catherine was extremely moderate in food and drink, she gave herself to love with all the passion of which she was capable.
The empress guards and is jealous of her favorites. Usually they are not allowed to leave the palace without her knowledge. There were exceptions, of course. Such an exception was Grigory Orlov, who openly cheated on the queen with his numerous mistresses and often left her for entire weeks. Such an exception was Prince Potemkin, the only one who retained his independence and, ceasing to be Catherine’s lover, became her friend, adviser, an absolutely necessary and valuable person. But other favorites were forced to reckon with their dependent position and not forget that they were supposed to be unobstinate and not offended. Thus, Mamonov only once received permission to go to the house of Ambassador Count Segur himself, but the Empress was so worried and jealous of her lover that her carriage flashed back and forth in front of the embassy windows, to the great bewilderment of the amazed guests.
It would be best for Catherine for the favorite to completely merge with her “I.” He followed the same interests, tastes and desires.
That is why she was so willing to educate them. And when other royal courts in Europe began to whisper about the immorality of Catherine the Great, Masson declared: “Her morals were refined and licentious, but she always maintained some external decency.”
What about other monarchs? At the Viennese court, a favorite was a common thing: he played the role of a servant, lover and friend. The mistress supports him and pays him a salary. He is always with her, during the toilet he replaces the maid, at dinner - a friend, on a walk - a companion, in bed - a husband. When we blame Catherine the Great, we forget that long before her, European queens introduced the position of favorite into common use. Neither Elizabeth of England, nor Mary of Scotland, nor Christina of Sweden made a secret of their relationships with their favorites.
From time immemorial, the king's mistress was higher than his legal wife. Madame Montespan, the mistress of King Louis XIV, had twenty rooms on the first floor at Versailles, and the queen only eleven, and then on the second floor. In front of the palace of the favorite of the Prussian King Frederick II, ballerina Barbarini, there was a guard of honor; maids of honor were at her service, as royal persons, and the honors given to her were truly royal. Excessive attentions were paid to the Marquise of Pompadour, the mistress of King Louis XV, and neither King Frederick II, nor Queen Maria Theresa, nor our Catherine the Great considered it shameful to correspond with her.
Henry IV had Gabrielle feel so much like queen that only her death prevented this official appointment. Henry II appears as a submissive slave before the all-powerful Diane of Poitiers, about whom his wife Catherine de Medici said: “This whore rules the state.”
Do we accuse Catherine the Great of irrepressible sensuality? But how many erotomaniac kings reigned in Europe, giving an example “worthy of imitation” to their subjects? The parade of favorites begins with Louis XIV. Under Frederick William II, the entire court was one great brothel. Everyone vied with each other to offer their wives and daughters to the king’s bed, and this was considered to be the highest favor on his part. Louis XV’s favorite “dish” were girls, and it was not difficult to seduce them simply because for his pleasure the girls were fattened up like geese to the slaughter.
And in general, the whole life of this king is a continuous chain of immorality and obscenity. It is difficult to instill morality in subjects. They tried their best, wanting to outdo each other in perversity and sadism. Count Gaufeld indulged in debauchery openly, in front of everyone, most unceremoniously in front of his own wife. In her presence, he caressed the women visiting the castle and forced his wife to witness his nightly adventures. Husbands had to test their sexual sadism on the patience of their wives. When Count Gaufeld's wife gave birth to a stillborn child and her life was in danger, her husband found nothing better to console her than to copulate with her right there, before her eyes. best friend Countess of Nesselrode.
He forced his wife to submit to all his lustful desires, all the disgusting depraved tricks he learned from prostitutes, and to top it all off he infected her with a venereal disease.
Watteau. French theater.
In France, a certain nobleman Becker maintained relations with children for seven years school age from eight years old. The judicial authorities became interested in him when a pregnant thirteen-year-old girl indicated her father's name. In prestigious brothels, clients demanded children as a special dessert - quite expensive, however.
It is known that Ivan the Terrible was madly in love with his first wife Anastasia. How many times did he cheat on her? The chroniclers discovered that after her burial, in the deepest grief, already on the eighth day after her death, he indulged in unbridled debauchery.
And so on for centuries. Here is the report of the board of trustees of the St. Petersburg House of Mercy Committee for 1908: “The twelve-year-old prostitute specialized in the unnatural satisfaction of the lust of erotomaniacs.” Unnatural meant oral contact. Less than ninety years have passed since in the most backward state in sexual development, which was considered the socialist USSR, where the sexual problem was taboo, there is now a program on television about the merits of oral sex as the highest degree of sexual pleasure. The program is called “About This” and is presented in such a way that people who engage in traditional sex should feel inferior.
Sexologist Ellis Gevlock, who studies the sexual issue in society, writes: “The libertine inevitably faces a complete moral decline; in his desire he reaches the very last sexual perversions.”
But what exactly is “sexual perversion”? Who determines the criteria of what is permitted and what is not permitted? And here we, dear reader, are completely perplexed: it turns out there is no such criterion. “One likes watermelon, the other likes pork cartilage.” What among Europeans was known as refined debauchery, among primitive tribes, due to their animal instinct, is considered the most natural and most natural. The theory of relativity makes itself felt here too.
So, in Australia, young boys and barely mature girls back in the 19th century, starting at the age of ten, cohabited completely freely. The act of sexual intercourse itself is not given any bad meaning here. Often parents copulated with their children, and the girls were obliged to spend the night with guests received by the tribe.
The northern peoples still have a custom, as a sign of special favor towards a guest, to give him his wife for the night. Almost from childhood, Polynesian girls behave, according to European standards, with unbridled licentiousness: they are constantly given away or sold with the consent of their parents. And when the navigator Cook, glorified by Vysotsky and eaten by the natives, arrived on one of the African islands, he was amazed at the sight of local men vying with each other to offer their wives, sisters and daughters to the navigators. While Europeans severely punish a newlywed if she turns out to be not a virgin.
In a word, everything is relative! And if we had our way, we would have given this Einstein not one, but a thousand Nobel awards just for one brilliant statement that EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD IS RELATIVE.
Thus, we will not be too strict towards Catherine the Great, but will try to calmly and without emotions deal with her lovers.
The most difficult and burdensome thing for Catherine II was her favorite Grigory Orlov. He was the second son of the remaining five (four sons died at an early age). His father, also Grigory, married at the age of 53 the sixteen-year-old girl Zinovieva. All sons lived in complete harmony and loved each other. With Grigory Orlov, the queen, then still Grand Duchess, brought the case together. And it happened like this: after one unpleasant scene with her husband Peter III, with whom, as we already know, Catherine’s life was worse than ever, she opens the window in order to cool down at least a little from the quarrel and breathe fresh air. And then her gaze falls on Grigory Orlov. And that moment decided everything: the reciprocal gaze of the handsome young man pierced her like an electric current. The historian talks about this event like this: “The thought of it alone filled the void in her heart that was created as a result of Count Poniatowski’s departure from St. Petersburg. Grigory Orlov very soon and not without pleasure noticed how strong impression he impressed the young princess. This is how an intrigue arose between Catherine and Orlov, which proceeded as usual. The darkness of the night covered forbidden meetings in Gregory’s rooms.”
In a word, a holy place is never empty. Poniatovsky drove away, Orlov appeared. We just can’t understand in any way what kind of rooms Grigory Orlov’s intimate meetings took place in? He then lived in an apartment on the corner of Nevsky and Moika. It was difficult for the princess to visit there under the watchful eye of Elizaveta Petrovna. In the palace, it’s also not painful to run away with love, eyes and ears are all around. But one way or another, Catherine and Grigory Orlov still found secluded places for love pleasures, and successfully, if she became pregnant from him soon. And since there had been no physical contact with her legal husband for a long time, the pregnancy had to be hidden, fortunately dresses were then worn wide. But God protects those who are protected. Catherine, in order to hide her pregnancy from Aunt Elizabeth, sat all the time, explaining this with a leg illness. My leg continued to hurt for several months until the time for childbirth came. And this was in 1762, already during the reign of Peter III, whom it was easy to deceive.
And Catherine the Great will give birth many more times, just a little bit short of breaking the record for illegitimate children of Elizabeth Petrovna.
In general, Catherine the Great, who gave birth to about nine illegitimate children, including those who died immediately at birth, gave the next child either to Mrs. Protasova, her trusted maid, or Mrs. Perekusikhina, her alcove lady, or to her trusted stoker Shkurin. He had to carry out great maneuvers so that the queen could give birth safely. It was later, when Peter III, her husband, forcibly died, the queen could not be embarrassed to walk around with a swollen tummy, but the fruits of love pleasures often appeared even in the presence of a husband. Then this same Shkurin came up with the following maneuver: as soon as the queen felt labor pains, Shkurin’s house would burn. Peter III - we know, we know such a passion of kings, Ivan the Terrible was overcome by it, and Peter I - retired to put out the fire. The owner himself set the house on fire. And while Peter III extinguished the fire, the queen was safely delivered from her burden.
Mother Catherine the Great always followed both the upbringing and future fate their kids. Each of them received an estate, money in the bank, education and... a surname. Well, of course, not the royal one, really. But quite worthy. Surnames arose either from the name of the estate, as was the case with the son of Catherine and Grigory Orlov - Bobrinsky. He received his surname from the Bobrino estate given to him, and one million money was deposited in the bank in his name. Parents will not be so generous to other children. This Bobrinsky spoiled a lot of blood for the empress. This son turned out to be an ungrateful scoundrel. Sent abroad, he boasted to foreigners of his illegally high origins, compromising the great queen, losing huge sums at cards, forcing his mother to pay. In general, he was a worthless son, although he was kept almost in a golden carriage; his father and mother secretly, in a closed carriage, often visited Shkurin. He didn’t take anything from his great mother, but from his father he had an immoderate rage and a hot temper. He was sent to Revel, to vegetate in the provinces, but the legitimate son of the Tsarina Pavel, who did everything to spite his mother, taking revenge for his disadvantaged youth, treated Bobrinsky kindly, called him to court, elevated him to count and even “for no reason at all” awarded him the Order of Saint Anna.
The second son's teacher was Ribas, a scientist husband. The child was sent to the cadet corps and his royal origin was not specifically advertised. But it was an open secret: everyone knew where he came from and paid him much more attention than the other children in this same cadet corps.
The next son, Galaktion, remained in the palace for a long time, and was often seen running around the rooms of the queen’s apartments. Then, when he grew up, he was made an officer and sent to England to receive his education. But Galaktion did not want to be educated, but began, like his older brother, to drink and party and died at a young age. The fourth son, Ospin, modest and quiet, who, as we already told you, received his surname for the smallpox serum given to Pavel, was a page, but also died early.
All the sons of the Tsarina and Orlov were losers and good-for-nothings. But daughter Natalya was a great success. Natalya Alekseevna Alekseeva, she bore such a surname, like Natasha Rostova, had no vain claims, was a beautiful blonde, a good mother and the wife of a Russian general. She believed that her life, although modest and quiet, was very calm and happy, which is, in fact, what a person needs.
One daughter, they said, from Potemkin, was raised by him, imitating his sixth niece.
Among historians, dear reader, there was a rumor that Catherine II also had a son from Grigory Orlov’s brother, Alexei. But there is no exact data on this topic, just vague assumptions. Actually, in the variety of Catherine’s illegitimate children, this does not matter significantly: one more, one less, what’s the difference! They will raise everyone, bring them out into the world, give them estates and a family name.
Grigory Orlov, quick for love pleasures, will become the father of several more children from the empress's ladies-in-waiting. There are known two of his illegitimate daughters from ladies-in-waiting, about whom their father did not care at all, so one of them, outraged by her father’s attitude towards her person, decided to seek justice from the empress herself. One day she waylaid her in the garden and threw herself at her feet, complaining about her father, from whom she did not know any kindness in infancy, and when she became a girl, she did not receive a dowry and was almost dying of hunger. Catherine the Great, in accordance with her kind nature, of course, provided this girl, who was taken in by Orlov with her maid of honor, with a dowry, but, frightened by such scenes (all the illegitimate children of her favorites would begin to watch for her in the garden and demand a dowry), she forbade allowing strangers into the park, when she walks the dogs there. So our Masha Mironova was lucky that she had waylaid the queen in the park before this order; if this had happened a little later, her beloved Grinev would have rotted in prison dungeons.
And Grigory Orlov was downright insolent in his love affairs, he didn’t even give married women peace, always getting into incidents. So, one day Senator Muromtsev found his wife in bed with Grigory Orlov and made a loud noise, demanding a divorce. Catherine was again forced to intervene in the matter and shut up her horned husband, giving him a beautiful estate in Livonia.
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The story of the “secret cabinet of Catherine the Great” has not yet been told.
Peter Wodic, who now lives in Belgium and is the author of several extremely interesting investigative films, heard this story from his father and did some real detective work. His father told him that during the war, friends who visited Tsarskoe Selo showed him very strange photographs of very strange furniture.
He came to Russia and tried to find out what happened to the furniture from those five rooms. Alas, he did not find out anything. Museum workers flatly refused to talk about this topic and stated that Catherine the Second did not have any “secret offices.” Then they took us to Gatchina and showed fifteen scattered exhibits from the Hermitage collections. A snuff box, several figurines, a shield with erotic medallions. “Of course,” said one historian who does not work at the Hermitage coldly, “Catherine, being a person of impeccable taste, would not limit herself to such an eclectic selection, but you will never know where the rest of the exhibits are.” The Hermitage staff talked about paintings, engravings, and small curiosities, but they completely denied the existence of furniture.
However, it is known that in the thirties a collection of erotic art belonging to the Romanov family was cataloged. This collection was shown to selected museum visitors, and evidence of this has been preserved. But there is no catalogue. It, like the entire collection, was allegedly destroyed in 1950, when the Stalinists cleared the memory of the Romanovs from “Bolshevik slander.” Judging by the stories, a significant part of the exhibits belonged to the 18th century, but who are these storytellers? What did they even understand about art?
The Hermitage staff admit that Catherine designed a kind of boudoir for Platon Zubov, but immediately deny that anything from this office survived into the 20th century.
However, it is not. There is a well-known story about how Alexander Benois, who worked at the Hermitage, showed St. Petersburg intellectuals an officially non-existent rarity - a wax copy of Potemkin’s penis, and Vasily Rozanov, by the way, damaged it with his sweaty fingers.
Whether it will be possible to find the “erotic cabinet” or whether it will remain a legend, no one can now say with confidence. We talked with Vodich about all this for several hours in a row, evaluating different possibilities, but came to the conclusion that only chance could clarify the situation.
This, alas, is the tradition of modern supermuseums - to hide and sometimes even destroy artifacts of erotic art. Yes, in times of rampant pornography and widespread libertianism, culture traders carefully preserve the traditions of bigotry and hypocrisy. And the National Gallery in London, the Louvre in Paris, the Pinakothek in Munich, the Hermitage in St. Petersburg, not to mention the Prado in Madrid and the Vatican in Rome, in the near foreseeable future will, like two hundred years ago, keep erotic art among the seven Swiss locks, away from the eyes of an immodestly curious public.
Catherine II is known for her great love. The official favorites of the Empress alone number more than 20 people. Of course, such behavior of the ruling person could not but entail various gossip and legends. Some of them have nothing to do with reality. Others seem more fact than fiction...
Many historians say that Catherine had a special intimate room in which she had fun with her last favorite Platon Zubov. Presumably this place was located in the Gatchina Palace or in Tsarskoe Selo. By the way, at that time the empress was 60 years old, and her favorite was only 22 years old.
Of course, the furnishings in the room corresponded to its name. For example, an original table was installed there, the legs of which were penises growing from women’s breasts.
The table came complete with an armchair, the decoration of which is also not very modest.
The same table was recently put up for sale at the world-famous Sotheby's auction. However, there is no evidence that this is the original.
Belgian director Peter Vodich even made a film about Catherine's intimate room at one time. He said that his father had seen strange photographs taken by soldiers during the war.
Allegedly, one of the rooms was completely decorated in an erotomaniac style. When Peter himself later came to Russia and started asking about this place, the museum workers flatly refused to comment on anything...
Among other legends about the empress, I would like to highlight the story about the intimate circle of Catherine II, which met in the Hermitage. In addition to the men, there were also several women. What this company did remains a mystery.
Well, in the end, we’ll tell you another story that circulated after the death of the empress. They say that they came up with it in Poland, whose inhabitants, after the divisions of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth, were very “grateful” to Catherine. But the story was especially popular at the French court.
Allegedly, shortly before her death, Catherine wanted to enter into an intimate relationship with a horse. The animal was piled on top of the empress and tied. The undertaking allegedly ended with the empress dying from rupture of internal organs...
Personally, it’s hard for me to imagine that last story could actually happen. Be sure to share your thoughts on this matter in the comments below!