6 chosen
Even in strong relationships, problems sometimes arise: minor grievances and discontent accumulate, conflicts occur. To minimize them, you need to work on relationships: discuss problems, make compromises... or play games. There are psychological games for two that help achieve greater mutual understanding in a couple.
Top down
When communicating with people, we always choose one of the positions: communication as equals, top-down (managerial position, this is how parents often communicate with the child) or bottom-up (dependent position). This is expressed both in our position in space and in intonation. Moreover, we ourselves may not notice that we are talking from one of these positions. But the “bottom” in such a conversation usually closes himself off from the “top”, does not listen and does not hear him. A common example of such interaction is a mother lecturing a child, and he looks around with an absent look.
But often we communicate this way not only with children, but also with peers, including loved ones. A wife can reprimand something to her husband from the top position, and then be surprised that he completely ignored her fiery speech. To better understand this situation, you can play it. Chat on some neutral topic in this position: one sits on the floor, the other stands, as if hanging over him. Then change places, and at the end take an equal position opposite each other. Usually the “bottom” is uncomfortable discussing even the simplest issues. It’s much more pleasant to talk on the same level. So why not communicate like this in real life?
I look at you like in a mirror...
Another psychological game is called "Mirror". The husband and wife sit face to face and take turns “mirroring” each other: repeating facial expressions and gestures. You can record all these funny antics on a video camera and compare the results to see who did better. By playing such a game, spouses learn to focus on each other, to think first of all not about themselves, but about their partner. And this will be useful in any relationship.
Follow you - even to the ends of the world
Psychologists are very fond of trust games. They came up with the idea of falling with your back on your partner’s arms. A safer game in this series is Guide. One participant is blindfolded, and the other must guide him through the room with obstacles, guiding only with his voice. Then the spouses change roles. During the game, they find out for themselves how much they trust each other, and at the same time learn to listen to each other’s advice.
What are you thinking about?
A funny psychological game - "Telepathy". The rules are very simple: the spouses sit face to face and one tries to convey to the other some kind of mental image without words. The second watches the eyes and facial expression of the interlocutor and tries to “read” his thoughts. At the end of such a session, the readings are verified. Practice shows that it is often possible to guess, if not the hidden object itself, then the emotional background associated with it. What do thoughts about him evoke: joy or sadness, fear or calm? This game will teach you to be more attentive to each other and understand your partner’s emotions without words.
Only good
This is not even really a game, but rather a useful tradition for any couple. Arrange a positive session during which you tell him why you love your husband and what admires you about him. After all, we often voice complaints and negative emotions, but somehow we forget about the good. And, by the way, in vain! After all, when we talk about love, we feel it much more strongly. So get used to sessions of mutual love confessions more often.
Dear site visitors psychological assistance, today you will find out what it really is psychological games in the lives of adults.
Please note right away that these are not those psychological games, or in general games that delight children in the sandbox and adults in entertainment and pastime. These are socio-psychological, role-playing, mostly unconscious by the players themselves, often destructive, dramatic, and sometimes tragic games that adults play - often their entire lives.
Psychological games that adults play almost their entire lives
About Games People Play wrote, back in the last century, in his psychoanalytic bestseller of the same name, the famous Canadian-American psychotherapist and scientist, founder of transactional analysis and psychotherapy, Eric Berne.(see analysis of the psychological game in the fairy tale “Little Red Riding Hood” or “Cinderella”)
The essence psychological games played by adults in that the gaming, often dishonest and hidden process of communication and interpersonal interactions brings some, sometimes unconscious, social, emotional-psychological, and even biological benefits (a certain “winning”) to the participants in the game.
In other words, gaming relationships (psychological games in relationships) satisfy many innate human needs. Namely: psychological, emotional, biological and social.
Of course, a person, like any other highly developed animal, could satisfy his natural needs in a normal, honest, direct and natural way, without resorting to psychological games, various tricks and deceptions.
But man is a social being, and most of the laws of nature belittle and trample upon society: norms and rules of morality, ethics and public opinion, ways of survival, creating stereotypes of thinking and behavior.
Psychological games are learned in childhood
Pay attention to completely small child- he is natural, natural, real. He doesn’t yet need psychological games...he satisfies all his needs directly, simply and spontaneously...as nature intended.
If a child wants to eat, he asks (for example, he cries, and calms down when he receives food).
If a baby wants to communicate with his mother, he shows it with all his appearance.
If he is scared, hurt or sad, then you can easily notice this too...
If he feels good and has fun, he smiles and rejoices...
But as the child develops, is raised and socialized, he learns the rules of behavior in society, and at the same time psychological games. Most of these rules are unwritten, so the child is taught, mostly non-verbally (without words) and unconsciously, by the parents themselves.
The child simply “stupidly” (without realizing it) copies from his parents and absorbs all these rules of behavior and survival in society. He learns not to be himself, he learns to wear a social mask and play psychological games.
Then, already in adult life, this unnaturalness in relationships, these unconscious psychological games learned in childhood in people’s relationships will cause many problems for a person. Starting from intrapersonal conflicts, misunderstanding of oneself and internal psychological problems(neuroses, phobias...), and ending with problems in interpersonal relationships(in the family, in the team, in business...).
Of course, it’s different for everyone - who is “lucky” with their parents and educators; who has a programmed life scenario, precisely based on family psychological games.
A typical family psychological game, played by roles, according to the Karpman triangle, is described in the article Problems in People's Relationships.
Why do people play psychological games - read more
As mentioned above, people play psychological games to obtain benefits (relatively speaking, “winning”), i.e. to satisfy their needs, which they have forgotten how to satisfy naturally.
Psychological benefits of playing:
Everyone has a need for psychological safety and security. With the help of psychological games (similar to psychological defenses), a person tries to avoid stressful situations and maintain your mental stability.
However, such games usually lead to the opposite.
Emotional benefits from gaming:
Every person needs emotional exchange. And if he was taught as a child to exchange emotions through games, then he can become an emotional (energy) vampire. This will suck all the emotional energy out of you, if you are in the game, leading you to depression, neurosis or psychosis.
Biological benefits of play:
People need physical contacts to survive: hugs, caresses, kisses... stroking... if a person does not know how to exchange them naturally, then he resorts to games. And in the game, such contacts can also be negative, for example, beatings...kicks, etc. What is subconsciously perceived by some people, for example hidden or overt masochists, as satisfying the need for physical contact.
From here you can see people who seem to be asking for kicks (even verbal ones), for example, wives who subconsciously choose a tyrant husband who will beat and humiliate her. In fact, this is an unconscious game.
Social benefits of gaming:
A person needs to completely occupy his time, structure it, otherwise he will either go crazy or die of boredom (literally).
Also, people are social animals, and they need communication with their own kind.
Destructive psychological games
Most of the unconscious or partially conscious psychological games in relationships and interactions between people are destructive for all participants.
Eric Berne and his followers described many games that adults play. All of them are divided into categories. Briefly about them...
Games with yourself
For example, when a person deceives himself...promises himself something (quit smoking, start new life from Monday, etc.), but does not fulfill it, inventing a bunch of excuses for himself...
Family and matrimonial games
For example, when a wife plays the Victim, enduring beatings and bullying from her husband, and then switches to the Persecutor, turning her husband into a Victim - turning him over to the police...
Or, for example, when a mother plays the Savior, tying the child’s shoes until high school, while making him a helpless victim, and after a while the child switches from the Victim to the Persecutor, and terrorizes the mother, say, extorting her pension for alcohol or drugs...
Sex games
One of the popular sexual games is described in the example above (“Temptation” or “Dynamo”)...
Party games
This is mostly gossip and condemnation of third parties, as well as most popular game“Why don’t you... Yes, but...”, where one player seems to ask for advice and help... others at this time try and give them... but in the end he rejects everything, often leading to a dead end in the conversation...
Games for life
For example, playing alcoholic with codependency (complicity) of family members.
Or playing like a constant debtor who takes out loans and can’t repay them...
Games underworld
For example, theft, cheating and fraud...
Games in the therapist's office
For example, when a client at an appointment with a psychotherapist, having read Wikipedia and imagining himself as all-knowing, is subconsciously determined not to receive help. At the same time, he sabotages the work of the psychologist in every possible way, for example, by playing “psychotherapist”.
When he really doesn’t receive help, as he wanted, he can say: “I told you he wouldn’t help me...”...
Constructive psychological games
Games can only become constructive if they are understood and realized. Some of the destructive games listed above can be converted into constructive ones, and after that you can completely quit the games and begin natural relationships, this is especially necessary when interacting with loved ones.Constructive games also include healing, developmental and educational psychological games for adults and children.....
// Personnel service. – 2008. – No. 12.
No matter what Voltaire or Descartes interprets,
The world for me is a deck of cards,
Life is a bank: rock moves, I play
And I apply the rules of the game to people.
M.Yu. Lermontov
One of the goals of a corporate party is to change the ordinary monotonous office environment to a bright and unusual feeling of celebration. Why is such a “change of scenery” necessary? Because monotony in work and in relationships leads to decreased performance. Communication in a relaxed atmosphere gives employees the opportunity to get to know each other better. After having a heart-to-heart conversation, colleagues may be pleasantly surprised that they work in the same team interesting people(“Surprisingly, Marina is not at all as boring as she seems: she is witty and erudite”), better understand your opponents and - temporarily or forever - declare a truce with them. Another goal of holding corporate parties may be to establish connections with new partners, the right people. Among other things, corporate parties allow employees and management to strengthen their authority and the authority of the company, and improve. It is at such events that the best are rewarded, and minor mistakes are forgiven to the guilty.
It must be emphasized that the atmosphere at a corporate event should be relaxed. Under no circumstances should a person be forced to attend a corporate party, no matter what it is dedicated to. You should not threaten with deprivation of the bonus or offending management - otherwise, the person will be forced to come to the holiday to the detriment of his personal or family interests and will harbor a grudge.
Corporate parties should not be too frequent. Of course, in a small team (6-10 people) it is possible to celebrate the birthdays of each employee. However, in corporations with more than 100 employees, this is quite difficult, and most importantly, it is not necessary. An annual corporate New Year's meeting is quite enough for a large company. In such companies, it is better to organize small parties for departments.
Corporate parties can be of several types. The presentation is usually dedicated to the opening of a new branch, the development of a new type of product, or a demonstration of the production capacity of new equipment. It is necessary to attract the interest of potential customers, advertise a new brand and increase its awareness. However, its goal is not to establish intra-corporate relations. As a rule, such holidays pass without any special entertainment program. The mood of the audience is set by the host of the event, whose selection must be taken very seriously. The second version of the presentation is the presentation of some shopping center, store. Such a presentation is aimed at potential buyers whose interest needs to be attracted. For this purpose, an entertainment program is needed, including competitions, prize draws and all kinds of quizzes. To organize a presentation, it is best to contact specialists. They will help you choose entertainment and choose a presenter who can maintain the mood appropriate to the occasion.
Outdoor recreation is one of the most the best ways raise team spirit in the team. Typically such events are held in warm time of the year. These can be short trips to barbecues, or joint trips to a boarding house or holiday home for the weekend. As a rule, in such a relaxing environment, people feel calm, they are no longer in the mood for showdowns.
A banquet is the most traditional way to hold corporate events. It is usually held in restaurants or banquet halls. Traditionally, at a banquet, employees eat, drink, listen to a report on the work done and what remains to be done, have another drink and go home. You can diversify the banquet with the help of an entertainment program, fun quizzes, prizes, and employee incentives.
Home holidays are held directly at the enterprise. Families of employees are invited to attend. You can organize a short tour of the production or office and move on to entertainment. It is best to separate the program for children and adults (although at certain points they may overlap). Such events raise the prestige of the enterprise in the eyes of not only employees, but also their relatives.
So, one of the elements of a corporate holiday is entertainment. As a rule, these are games that lift the spirits, ignite employees with a sense of excitement, and raise team spirit. However, the range of corporate games is small. Apart from the traditional darts, sculpture competition and dancing on the newspaper, little comes to mind.
Meanwhile, according to A.S. Makarenko, " good game" is similar to "good job."
Their similarities are as follows:
In every “good game,” as in “good work,” there is first of all effort: physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual;
- “good game”, just like “ good job", brings joy - creativity, victory, quality;
- in a “good game”, as in a “good job”, there is the same great responsibility.
We propose to expand the range of entertainment at a corporate party through psychological games. This allows you to “kill two birds with one stone”: on the one hand, psychological games are fun and entertaining, on the other hand, they develop and, as they say, provide “food for thought.” Communication and development games are most suitable for a corporate party. creativity.
Communication games create a festive mood, promote the development of communicative competence, mutual understanding between participants and group cohesion.
You can start by getting to know each other. Even if you for a long time working together, this is not a guarantee that you know each other well - not professionally, but purely humanly.
An introduction allows you to get to know your colleagues better.
Each participant offers his own business card. This could be a song, poem, aphorism, motto, drawing, story about yourself, etc.
As an option for dating, the game “Name – Character Trait” can be used. Each participant names his name and the character trait that he expresses, starting with the letter of his name. For example, Olga is an optimist.
Rain.
This nice exercise can serve as a setting for some important event. Before performing it, we can talk about magic, which always has a place in our lives, but for this it is important to be sensitive and attentive. The magical rain that is about to fall can be heard if there is complete silence and attention.
All participants stand in a circle. The leader walks inside the circle, and when he looks into the eyes of each participant, he begins to repeat his movements until the leader comes up to him again, looks into the eyes and changes the movement. The leader walks in a circle and, looking one by one into the eyes of the participants, on the 1st circle he rubs his palm against each other, on the 2nd circle he snaps his fingers, on the 3rd circle he slaps his palms on his knees, on the 4th circle he knocks his palms on the knees and stomps his feet, on the 5th he slaps his palms on his knees, on the 6th he snaps his fingers, on the 7th he rubs his palm against his palm, on the 8th he simply lowers his hands.
So the rain ends and subsides. The purpose of this exercise is relaxation and a lyrical mood. We can say that the rain that just passed brought calm and reflection.
The wind blows…
It is known that in a group there may be different weather: sunny joy, lightning voltage, foggy inoperability, cool inattention. But it can also be quite windy. The forecasts in this case are good, because the wind that blows on the participants in this exercise contributes to the development of the territory, allows you to take a closer look at each other and even learn a lot new information.
Participants sit in a circle on chairs (there should be no empty chairs). The driver stands in the center and says: “The wind blows on those who...” and names some external sign, which participants have, for example, on those wearing black boots.
Participants in black boots change places with each other (you cannot change places with neighbors).
The driver's task is to take free place.
One of the participants who did not have time to take a seat becomes the driver.
Some employees find it difficult to shake off emotional stress and leave thoughts about work even at a party. The games below will help them and their colleagues relax.
Pig race
Before the start of the game, the host announces that a new Olympic sport has been opened, which is rapidly winning the sympathy of the participants. And now everyone present can try themselves in it. So, we got to the competition in a new Olympic sport - pig racing. In order to win, we need to pass the “grunt” around the circle as quickly as possible. First let's practice grunting.
Now let's start the game. The competition is held against time. “Grunt” is transmitted from one participant to another by turning the head. Try to achieve a record.
A group of 30 people usually manages it in two seconds. It looks like a single long “grunt” - a wave. This seemingly simple and frivolous exercise improves the emotional level, promotes group cohesion and encourages participants to interact.
Typewriter
All participants are given letters. The presenter commands: “Pay in alphabetical order!” Then some phrase is given, for example, a proverb or a line from a poem, and it is “printed” in this way: everyone taps off their letter, their punctuation mark. Everyone pauses. This game helps to establish relationships with partners.
My darling
Participants are asked to conduct an “audit” of the contents of their bags and pockets and find any item that they like, about which they could say: “My precious” (as Gollum, a character in Tolkien’s books, said about the One Ring). For a few minutes, participants reflect on the questions: Why do I like this subject? What does it symbolize for me, why do I carry it with me? How might this item appeal to others?
Then each of the participants in turn gets the floor to make a public presentation of “their charm” (1-2 minutes for each), which would present the answers to these questions. The form of presentation can be different - an oral story, a small pantomime, etc. The exercise promotes self-discovery, overcoming shyness and developing communicative competence.
Nonsense
Each participant receives a sheet of paper and writes on it the answer to the presenter’s question, after which he folds the sheet so that the answer is not visible and passes it to his right neighbor. He answers the presenter’s next question in writing, folds the sheet again, passes it on, etc. When the questions are over, the last participant unfolds the sheet in his hands and reads the answers written on it out loud, like a coherent text.
Sample list of questions.
Who?
Where?
With whom?
What did you do?
How did this happen?
What do you remember?
And what happened in the end?
Outwardly, the game resembles a joke, but the resulting texts sometimes turn out to be quite unexpected and make you think about the problems that are significant to the participants.
Guessing game + broken phone
The presenter makes a wish for an object and whispers its name to the first participant. This participant (and all subsequent ones) must tell the rest of the chain about this item in a whisper, not naming it, but describing its properties and areas of application. The listener can ask clarifying questions. The last participant in turn names the intended object. You can make the game more difficult by introducing a time limit and an element of competition.
K.U.B.O.U
The mysterious name of this game stands for “Karate Kid Killed the Bull with One Punch.” The game is very similar to “Broken Phone”, but requires precise recording of the evidence on paper. Both children and adults really like it, because it allows them to come to serious and important conclusions from the ease and excitement of participation.
Several participants (usually 7-8 people) go out the door, one of them remains in the room. The presenter says the phrase to the remaining participant: “The karateka killed the Bull with One Punch.” One participant enters, and the first one explains this phrase to him without the help of words; he writes it down on paper as he understood it, without voicing it. Then he shows the next person what he himself understood (written down on paper), etc. At the end of the exercise, all phrases are read out in reverse order their writing. This exercise helps develop participants' creativity and non-verbal communication skills.
Interview
The presenter gets the role. Sample roles: winner of a beauty contest; famous wit, merry fellow and chatterbox; a very serious, taciturn type who does not know how to laugh or joke; a lady academician who made an important discovery; mask man, without emotions; a sharp, direct person who does not hide his dissatisfaction with the world; an invariably friendly person, happy with the whole world and with himself. Everyone else plays the role of meticulous journalists who interview him at a press conference. Participants in the game must ask the presenter tricky questions, and he must try to answer them adequately. Time is limited. After the end of the game, it is interesting to ask the host which question caused the greatest difficulty in answering and why.
Newspaper dragging
Participants are divided into pairs (it is desirable that the partners are approximately equal in physical capabilities), receive a newspaper and roll it into a tube. Then they stand on one leg at a distance of about a meter from each other, bending the other and holding it with one hand. With their free hand, they take a tube from the newspaper and begin to pull it, trying to throw each other off balance, but dosing the force so that the newspaper does not tear.
The exercise illustrates the scenario in which interpersonal conflicts: partners “pull” each other, but at the same time cannot use force and are forced to act softly, relying more on cunning, otherwise this threatens to break the relationship.
Laurencia
Very good game motor activity, but before carrying it out, you need to assess the degree of physical readiness of the participants for this game. This is an old German game. Laurencia is a girl's name.
All participants stand in a circle and repeat the following words after the leader:
Laurencia, where are you?
Laurencia, we are waiting!
Well, when will we go dancing with you?
So when will Monday finally come?
And you and I will dance?
Laurencia!
Then next time Tuesday is added, then Wednesday, and so on all the days of the week. Participants do squats for each day of the week and name. The pace of the game is constantly increasing.
Bouquet
The participants of the game are 9 people, all the rest are observers who should not communicate with the participants. 9 chairs are placed in a circle in the center of the room. The presenter invites participants and invites them to sit on chairs in the center of the audience. All others (observers) are located at a distance of 1-1.5 m from the main participants.
At the first stage, a label with an image of a flower and the name of the role in the organization (director, sales manager, psychologist, personnel officer, technician, etc.) is glued to the forehead of each of the main participants using tape. All participants will see social roles each other, but no one will know their own role, since according to the rules of the game you cannot say their names out loud. All participants, by asking indirect questions and giving indirect clues, should help each other determine their role as soon as possible. The name is considered guessed if the participant himself names his role correctly. At the second stage, participants must make three flower compositions: sit next to each other and make a justification for combining these three social roles into a composition.
Pum-pum
Presenter: Now we will play the game “Pum-Pum”. “Pum-pum” is some characteristic that is present in some participants, and in others it is not. This will definitely be an objective characteristic. In order to confirm the presence or absence of this characteristic, it is not necessary to know each other well.
For example, I can wish for a simple “pum - pum” - shoelaces. Any person who accidentally enters the room will confirm that some have laces and others do not. The same “objective” will be the “pum-pum” that I will now wish for, but, of course, it will not be shoelaces.
Ask me open-ended questions. I will give honest answers. Based on my answers, you can guess what kind of pum-pum this is. Your questions might be: “What is this pum-pum for? How does it manifest itself in humans? Etc." You can’t ask just one question: “What is pum-pum?” The game promotes a better understanding of your partner and teaches you to ask open questions.
Games for the development of creative abilities are aimed at developing and activating creativity - the system of creative abilities. The purpose of these exercises is to teach a person to act productively in new and uncertain situations, relying on his creative potential, to navigate in rapidly changing circumstances, to make adequate decisions in rapidly changing circumstances, to make adequate decisions when information is incomplete.
Ads
Host: We all know well what advertising is. Every day we see commercials on TV screens and have an idea of how different the ways of presenting a particular product can be. Since we are all consumers of advertised goods, it would not be an exaggeration to consider us advertising specialists.
Let's imagine that we have gathered here to create our own commercial for some product. Our task is to present this product publicly in such a way as to highlight its best aspects and create interest in it. Everything is the same as in the usual activities of an advertising service.
One small nuance - the object of our advertising will be specific people sitting here. Each of you will draw a card with the name of one of those present written on it. It may turn out that you will receive a card with your own name. It's OK! This means you will have to advertise yourself. There will be one more condition in our advertising: you must not mention the name of the person you are advertising. Moreover, you are asked to imagine a person in the form of some product or service. Think about who your protégé could have turned out to be if he had not been born in human form. Maybe a refrigerator? Or a country house? Then what kind of refrigerator is this? And what is this Vacation home?
Name the category of population your advertisement will be aimed at. Of course, the advertising video should reflect the most important and true advantages of the advertised object.
The duration of each commercial is no more than one minute. The group then has to guess which of its members was featured in the advertisement. If necessary, you can use any objects as an entourage and ask other players to help you.
Make it more useful
Participants are asked to think about what things would be more useful if they were:
increase decrease);
raise (lower);
make it more expensive (cheaper);
change their geometric shape;
make edible (inedible).
The exercise is performed in teams of 4-5 people for 10-12 minutes. After this, representatives from each of the subgroups voice their options. In addition to training the ability to generate ideas, the exercise helps to unite the group and identify leaders.
Original use
This game involves coming up with as many different, fundamentally feasible ways of using ordinary objects in an original way as possible, for example:
paper sheets or old newspapers;
sports hoops, dumbbells;
bricks;
car tires;
bottle caps;
torn tights;
burnt out light bulbs;
plastic bottles;
aluminum beverage cans.
The task is performed in teams of 4-5 people for 10 minutes. The game is most visual and fun if it is possible to give the participants the items in question and ask them not only to name them, but also to show the proposed ways of using them. The team that proposed and showed wins greatest number original ways use of items.
Changing market
Group game for 10-15 people. Its conditions are as follows. There are a number of specific resources. Everyone’s task is to sell their resources at a high price and buy other people’s (needed) ones cheaply. Every five to ten minutes the presenter changes the resource cost rates (plus or minus, changes can be large or small). In addition, the players themselves can change or maintain the current course (this should cost a lot, but proper use should bring dividends, especially if it is not just one player who is spending, but a coalition). The game should have implicit coalitions - groups of people whose goals do not contradict each other.
What to do, if...
Participants are presented with difficult situations related to their work, from which they need to find an original way out. The participant who, in the opinion of the audience, will give the most resourceful answer receives a prize point.
Example situations:
What to do if you lost your employees' salaries or public money in a casino?
What to do if you are accidentally locked in the office late at night?
What should you do if your dog ate an important report that you have to submit to the director in the morning?
What to do if you are stuck in an elevator with general director your company?
Secret line
One of the participants comes up with a line from famous song or a poem consisting of 6-7 words. Participants can ask the person who made the line 10 questions. In 6 or 7 answers (depending on how many words are in a line), he must include one word from this line.
Words cannot be changed by cases, tenses, or numbers. Prepositions are included along with the next word. In answers, words appear in any order.
Complete the poems
Add two lines:
Once upon a time, an eccentric
My head hit the attic...
My friend Valery Petrov
I've never been bitten by a mosquito...
The fly is drowning in sweets,
In a jar on the window...
Japanese haiku
It is proposed to add the ending in three lines (haiku) of the Japanese poet.
Willow is bent over and sleeping
And it seems to me
Nightingale on a branch
……………….
This is her soul.
The flowers have faded...
Seeds are scattering and falling
……………………………
It's like tears
Our life is a dewdrop
Let just a drop of dew
………………………
Our life - and yet
According to J. Huizinga, play decorates life, complements it, as a result of which it is vital for every person, regardless of his age and social status. It is necessary for the individual biological function, it is needed by society because of the human meaning contained in it, because of its expressive value, because of the social and spiritual connections it establishes. The game is on the border with the serious: it itself turns into serious, turning the serious into a game. She formalizes the holiday and at the same time is included in it as an integral part. Modern game allows you to go beyond the usual course of things, provides a person with the opportunity to create. The game gives you the opportunity to escape from the depths of your feelings, to turn away from yourself, overwhelmed with work and everyday worries, to other people, to feel unity with them. And where there is unity and cohesion, there are no destructive conflicts, no manipulations and intrigues. In a word, no to “wars” and infighting in the organization, yes to constructive play that promotes personal growth and expanding horizons.
"My life path» (25 min).
Participants are asked to draw their own “life map”, which depicts the main, memorable events of their lives. The date of birth is placed at the beginning of the card; everything else can be depicted with symbols or signed.
After finishing drawing (about 15 minutes), participants choose partners, sit in pairs and tell each other about their life events.
"Level of Happiness"(5 minutes).
Group members are asked to rate the level of happiness in their lives in general on a 100-point scale. This should be said out loud to the whole group and noted on your chart. As the game progresses, questions may be asked of each other. Talk - alternating: the first one speaks about positive qualities, the second - about negative ones, the third - again about positive ones, etc.
"Mother and Child"(10 min).
The presenter explains the role of physical touch in communication between people. Then the participants are divided into pairs in which they play the role of mother and child. “Mom” must express her feelings towards the “child” by touching parts of his body (from head to toe) and accompanying her actions kind words. After three minutes, the participants change roles.
Discussion: Who did you prefer being a child or a mother? Why?
"We are similar?.."(25 min).
First, the participants walk randomly around the room and say 2 phrases to everyone they meet, starting with the words:
You are like me in that...
I'm different from you in that...
Another option: In pairs, talk for 4 minutes on the topic “How we are alike”; then 4 minutes - on the topic “How we are different.” At the end of the game, a discussion is held, attention is drawn to what was easy and what was difficult to do, what discoveries were made. As a result, the conclusion is drawn that we are all essentially similar and at the same time different, but we have the right to these differences, and no one can force us to be different.
"Stories on the theme "Joys of Life""(60-90 min).
This block of exercises brings the joys of life to the forefront. Participants are encouraged to think about what brings or could bring them joy in their lives. At the same time, it is necessary to teach them to work together in a group, feel each other and achieve results in joint group activities.
The group is divided into small groups of 2-3 people. According to the number of small groups, pictures are laid out (they should touch on as many areas of life as possible, such as love, friendship, sexuality, free time, work, family). The group members begin to write a story based on their picture; they have about 5 minutes to do this. After this, each group moves to the next picture and continues the story started by the previous group. This continues until the first group returns to their first picture (no more than 5 transitions). After this, the stories are read and discussed in a large group.
“Sentences that begin with the words “What would happen if...”(90 min).
This method can also be used to encourage teenagers to discuss their feelings. Participants should be encouraged to reflect on their own behavior in relation to certain emotional states and to explore possible alternative behaviours.
Sheets with the beginning of sentences presented on them are laid out on the table or on the floor. Each participant chooses a theme and makes a collage based on it. You can also form small groups that will work together on one topic. The finished collages are presented to everyone and serve as a basis for conversation.
Option: another opportunity to work with proposals: invite participants to write a story on a given topic or show a pantomime. Another, simpler option is to give everyone an unfinished sentence and hear the continuation.
The sentence "What would happen if...".
Possible sentence starters:
If I'm angry then...
If I'm sad then...
If I'm afraid, then...
If I have no desire to do something, then...
If I can't stand someone, then...
If I'm proud of myself, then...
If I want to meet someone, then...
If I did something well, then...
If I have overcome something, then...
If such a misfortune happens to me that I can no longer live the way I am now...
If I realize that I am no longer doing well at school and, in fact, I should leave it...
If I ever get seriously ill...
If I suddenly get disappointed...
If I lose my best friend/ your best friend...
If I'm desperate...
If I'm stressed...
If I feel excluded from the group...
If I'm lonely...
If I'm jealous...
If I'm bored...
If I'm not confident...
If I'm jealous...
If someone admires me...
"Kingdom"(60 min).
Participants are asked to imagine themselves as residents of the kingdom. As in any kingdom, there is a king, a queen, their courtiers and subjects.
Then the roles are distributed: the one who wants to be the king is chosen to play the role of king. The king chooses his queen. After this, the king and queen each choose two courtiers or subjects, naming their functions at court.
They, in turn, also choose their assistants, one at a time, and so on until all members of the group receive their roles in the kingdom. As roles are distributed, spatial movements of the participants are also made. A throne is built for the king and queen, and the rest of the court is placed near the throne next to those who have chosen them.
At the next stage, the game itself begins, where all its participants take turns, starting with the king and further in order of subordination, making one change in the kingdom so that life in it is better. (Option: the king and queen, after 2-3 moves, other participants have the right to make additional changes.)
The game can be played in one or several circles. During the pauses, the question is discussed - what is happening in our kingdom?
Discussion ( sample topics): “I realized that today / now...”; “I was surprised...”; "I felt..."; "I guess, that..."; “Today I was annoyed...”; “I really liked/didn’t like...”
"Metaphors"(20 minutes).
One goes out the door, the rest make a wish for someone present. The person who returns must guess who the mystery is. To do this, he must ask 5 metaphor questions. For example, if it were a plant (flower, dish, color, etc.), then what kind of plant it would be.
The game is repeated alternately with all participants.
"Farewell Ritual"(10 min).
Leading. We need to preserve what happened in the group today: preserve this trust, sincerity, the feelings that we experienced today. Therefore, there is no need to discuss all this with other people outside the circle. What you want to say, what may not have been said today, you can say at our next meetings. And this will help us maintain the energy of the group, the mood of our life during these classes. The moment of farewell is always an exciting moment and therefore we will always say goodbye in a special way, in the form of a kind of ritual.
Everyone stands in a circle, and each one in turn says goodbye to the others with some gesture. They repeat everything, trying to fully convey the mood of the gesture.
Option: participants are invited to choose their own farewell ritual.
3. Leader's suitcase.
Among organizational skills, facial expressions, gestures, and speech techniques occupy an important place. The complex we have developed will help you master these skills.
Exercise 1. Read any text, at least the weather forecast: in a whisper; with maximum volume; as if you were frozen; as if there was hot porridge in the mouth.
Exercise 2. The same thing, in combination with all of the above, but as if it reads: alien; a person who has just learned to speak; robot; five year old child; as if all of humanity is listening to you, and with this text you must explain how important it is to strive to do good to each other, but you have no other words; as if with this text you are declaring your love, and there will be no other opportunity.
Exercise 3. Without leaving your chair, sit as you sit: Chairman State Duma; bee on a flower; cashier at the workplace; punished Pinocchio; bride at a wedding; Hamlet; criminal in the dock. Improvise.
Exercise 4. Draw the following: how the baby walks; a lion; ballet dancer; French king; Indian chief.
Exercise 5. Smile like a very polite Japanese smiles; a dog to its owner; cat in the sun; a young man in love with his girlfriend; wolf to hare.
Exercise 6. Frown like: King Lear; a child whose toy was taken away; Napoleon; a person who wants to hide a smile; angry parrot.
Why these exercises? To “be all kinds of things,” to train, regulate your internal state, and learn to manage it. Attention and imagination will help create internal “piggy banks” of intonations, movements, gestures, ways of expressing feelings, demonstrating thoughts that are so necessary for a leader in the process of influencing people.
Exercises 7 and 8. We offer two special exercises that will help leaders correct some of the physical deficiencies that create certain obstacles in their work. For example, the guys vertically challenged There are small, inexpressive movements, while for tall ones, on the contrary, they are sweeping and clumsy.
For leaders with small movements. Individual training consists of a person playing a game at home while performing some physical activity. For example: all the furniture in the house is lead, that is, very heavy. “Heaviness” requires larger movements, larger, more significant.
For leaders with sweeping movements. A similar exercise with the only difference that all the furniture, all objects in the house are glass. Glass requires more careful, delicate handling.
One of the necessary skills of a leader is his ability to understand the psychological state of his partner, “high sensitivity,” and the ability to understand the motives of actions. The exercises proposed below contribute to the development of observation and attention - important qualities of a leader’s personality.
Exercise 9. Do you know well the appearance of your classmates or members of your organization (association)? Find in each of them something that you have not noticed until now. What kind of eyes, hair, chin shape? Describe it from memory, and then check it when you meet.
Exercise 10. “Like the back of our hand” - we say this about what is familiar to us. However, take a close look at your five fingers. Are they familiar to you? Look at your palms. Close your eyes, imagine them, then describe them.
Exercise 11. Individual training that develops visual memory and observation skills. When walking down the street, practice instantly “photographing” people you come across, houses, store windows, etc. The eye should instantly capture the image in all its details. Your eyes can do this, you just haven’t done it before, and therefore haven’t trained your eyes. To remember and be aware of captured images, you need to carefully train. The order is approximately the same as in photography: shoot - look; we manifest - we remember; we print - we remember; We look at the prints.
Exercise 12. Observation, visual memory, efficiency. In 30 seconds, find and remember all the objects in the room whose names begin with the letter C: table, chair, photograph, napkin, etc. The more, the better.
Exercise 13. What does it look like? (Exercise by Leonardo da Vinci). Looking at stains of ink and ink on paper, cracks on a wall or stone, you can see the similarity of images to different battles, animals, clothes, facial expressions, infinite set of things. Peering into the shadows on the ceiling, the folds in the curtains, you will see different pictures. This exercise develops fantasy, imagination, creative thinking, visual memory.
Exercise 14. What's new? Every day, when entering the classroom or headquarters of your organization, look for what changes have occurred here, what’s new in the clothes of your comrades, etc. And so on every day!
Exercise 15. Biography according to views. Look closely at people's eyes. Notice how many “ways to look” there are, so to speak. When classifying views, think each time: why one person looks at the same object, at the same event in one way, and another differently. When studying people’s views, you will have to think about the uniqueness of their characters, about how the particularities of a person’s connections with other people develop as a result of their life’s journey. The ability to quickly carry out this kind of analysis is necessary for a leader.
Exercise 15. Living things. In previous exercises to develop imagination, it was suggested to determine what a spot, shadow, crack looks like... Having mastered the inner vision, it is proposed to fantasize about what will happen if the chair comes to life. What would he do? How old is he? What is his character? What does he love and what does he dream about? The exercise develops the ability to connect observations with fantasy.
The effectiveness of any business largely depends on how skillfully the leader builds his communication with his comrades, whether he has the skills to build an individual conversation.
Exercise 17. Modeling a conversation, “probing the soul of an object.” (K. S. Stanislavsky.) One of the fairy tales by J. Rodari tells about three types of people: glass ones broke from a careless touch, wooden ones were deaf even to strong influences, the straw ones caught fire even in mild disturbances.
Situation. You want your friend to give up watching an interesting movie or going to a disco (which he is already in the mood for) and help you prepare a case for all members of the organization. Imagine a friend made of glass, wood, straw. Play out different options for a conversation with him. Having determined the type of one of your friends, have a real conversation with him. Compare the playback results with the real ones.
Exercise 18. Creation psychological compatibility at the initial stage of the conversation.
Situation: You need to find out your friend’s opinion on an issue that is important to you, but unpleasant to him. Imagine this situation. Keep in mind that in the dialogue, each partner can occupy one of 4 role positions.
We will call the first “position of non-participation.” You were not noticed or heard. More precisely, they pretended not to notice or hear.
The second position - “an extension from above” - is an independent, non-subordinate position, and even vice versa - subordinating, taking responsibility upon itself.
The third position is “an extension from below” - a dependent, subordinate position.
The fourth position - “an extension nearby” - expresses the ability and desire to take into account the situation, understand the interests of others and distribute responsibility between oneself and another person.
The position of one person in a dialogue is very informative for another, and the nature of the dialogue and its results largely depend on it. People's positions in dialogue are not always consistent.
Exercise. Play out conversation options using 4 role positions. Develop recommendations for behavior in each situation.
Exercise 19. Organization of direct conversation.
Depending on the circumstances, a person may be in one of the “weight categories” (meaning the state of mind):
. « a light weight“- lightness of soul, you want to do everything, everything works out;
. “the back of the English queen” - the very figure of a person means that now he will bring the truth to all questions;
. “all reluctantly” - this is exactly what you don’t want to do, your thoughts are occupied with other things;
. “heavy weight” - I’m very tired of everything, something hurts a lot, I have no strength to do anything.
Suggest 4 situations in which one of the proposed states would be appropriate. Play it and analyze it.
Exercise 20. Initiative management. Imagine that you are having a conversation with someone. Its initiator is your interlocutor. You are still a passive participant in the conversation - you assent, make remarks, etc. Try to seize the initiative, take leadership into your own hands. And, conversely, try to force your partner (interlocutor) to become the leader of the contact. Think about how to do this. Apply the method in a real situation.
Exercise 21. Managing the conversation.
Situation. Meeting acquaintances. Task: reduce the conversation to a given topic. The topic is communicated into the ear of any member of the audience so that the partner does not hear. Rude techniques are prohibited, for example: “Let’s talk about...”, “And I want to talk about...”. Analyze the course of the conversation: how the goal was realized, the internal state of the partners, mistakes.
Exercise 22. Analysis of individual conversation. Analyze one of the individual conversations. Analysis scheme: purpose of the conversation, structure, result, positions, state of partners. Your version of the conversation.